Is my toddler suffering from anxiety?

amother

OP ↓

Tue, Sep 03 2024, 11:59 pm

I'm utterly perplexed.

Until a couple of months ago, my 2.5 year old was a docile, sweet natured, uncomplicated baby. In my head, I dubbed him 'low maintenance '.

Something happened. He is a completely different child now.

I'm pretty sure that this change is related to a bad playgroup experience. It took a few months for me to realize that he was in a neglectful, overcrowded , poorly run group.

(Some examples: I signed him up as 1 of 12 participants in a brand new group. . Each week I realized that more kids were in the group. At one point, I stood outside at dismissal to check, and counted 19 toddlers being picked up. This, with only 1 part-time assistant. Also, after a month or so, the place started to reek.. I could go on,, but just picture every type of neglect, and you probably on target. )

I pulled him out immediately .

Since then, he is soooo clingy. Since May, I've kept him home.. he panics if he doesn't see me.. he worries when I'm away.. He often wraps his arms around my knees and insists that I hold him.. he wakes up several times every. Single.. night.. and spends the remainder of each night in our bed.

I'm crumbling. I am a busy mother of a large family bh, and I cannot sustain this. But more importantly, I am so concerned! My baby is scared, and all the love and attention we lavish on him don't seem to be helping much.

I would appreciate advice!

amother

DarkOrange ↓

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 12:19 am

My son is similar. Low maintenance baby, sent him to a babysitter where there was major neglect and pulled him out... He's 5 now and he has anxiety. Idk what to do about it tho

amother

↑ OP ↓

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 12:24 am

That's awful!

How old was he then?

amother

Aqua

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 12:27 am

I wonder if sleep training would work here? Maybe some play therapy too?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 12:36 am

Is play therapy even a thing for a toddler?

Ok. I did a quick search, and it seems it's not recommended for children under 3.
I wonder if his comprehension skills are up for it yet.

Does anyone know?

amother

↑ DarkOrange

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 12:54 am

amother OP wrote:

That's awful!

How old was he then?

Little over a year
He was there for 4 days. They pretty much forgot about him bcz there were too many kids. He didn't nap while he was there and they forgot to feed him. I'll never forget when she told me "I'm so sorry I forgot to give him lunch"

He became very anxious to try new things and go to new places but I don't think he really suffers from anxiety bh. Once I push him to do something and he sees it's not so bad then he's ok

singleagain

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 6:05 am

I just want to say anxiety absolutely can kick in young. I don't know what to do, but maybe stay with speaking to your pediatrician to get recommendations for next steps?

amother

DarkCyan

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 6:40 am

Personally I'd try some craniosacral therapy, homeopathy and EFT tapping. These all work on a nervous system level where the trauma is stuck. No talking or cognition needed.

amother

Crocus ↓

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 8:57 am

Put your hand on your child gently with intention to send love, care, support to the child. You can do it anywhere. See what happens.

Be confident in yourself because your child can pick up YOUR anxiety. Don't worry about the toddler's anxiety. Have faith in their ability to heal.

Deal with your own guilt and anxiety. This will help your child.

Be safe, be secure but you don't need to hold your kid and soothe them all day. Be happy. Be positive. Set out toys. Have fun.

Teach him animal noises, pretend to be animals. Let him get out his anger. Make a tower and let him break it. Let him run around and be a kid!

Hatzlocha!

amother

↑ OP

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 10:25 am

amother Crocus wrote:

This is so interesting.

Are you basing this on a specific approach?

amother

Gray

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 10:30 am

This sounds normal for the situation but it can turn into anxiety. I have a child with anxiety which started when her sibling was born and was very needy at first. You can have assessed for anxiety and get ideas on how to help him. He is still so little.

tichellady

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 10:37 am

Have you spoken with him about playgroup and reassured him he isn’t going back there?

amother

↑ Crocus

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 11:41 am

amother OP wrote:

This is so interesting.

Are you basing this on a specific approach?

Yes. From a somatic course I took by Irene Lyon. She culls from different sources, mentors, and techniques.

amother

Jasmine

Wed, Sep 04 2024, 11:56 am

This is normal after being in neglectful place. Give him time. In the meantime be super positive and show him he’s safe. Don’t run to save him from his uncomfortable feelings because then it makes it worse. Say you are ok I’m here come sit next to me because my hands are busy and I can’t pick you up right now. Be very encouraging let him know he’s ok.