Who wears a gown? | Imamother

amother

Fri, Aug 30 2024, 5:05 pm

Mazel Tov! The first grandchild in the family is a Kallah! It’s very exciting. Does her mother’s sister, who is married with children, typically wear a gown? How about the sister’s daughters, little girls who are the kallah’s first cousins? Do they wear gowns?

amother

Tangerine

Fri, Aug 30 2024, 5:17 pm

I think it depends on the family. Will you be in a lot of pictures? Are you close knit? How fancy will the wedding be? Also many aunts wear dressy long now which is similar to the gowns.

amother

Aquamarine

Fri, Aug 30 2024, 5:57 pm

In my Lakewood side of the family, aunts wear gowns. On the modern side of the family, aunts wear gowns/long evening dresses

Nieces under the age of 6-10 usually wear gowns, over that it’s just dressy dresses

keym

Fri, Aug 30 2024, 6:12 pm

In my family, aunts wear long or extra dressy.
First cousins wear extra nice but not gowns.
Bh we have a large family and we agreed that the cost would become exorbitant if we started with gowns for cousins and aunts.

The only gowns are siblings, mother, grandmother and nieces of the chasuna and kalla.

ittsamother

Sat, Aug 31 2024, 10:02 pm

keym wrote:

The only gowns are siblings, mother, grandmother and nieces of the chasuna and kalla.

Yeah, I agree with this. We never had any rules about anyone else, everyone else can wear what they want as far as levels of fanciness but usually the people listed above are the only ones I see in actual gowns.

simcha12plus

Sat, Aug 31 2024, 10:08 pm

in our family (both mine and my husbands), the girls, unless they are very close to the kallah, do NOT wear gowns. Gowns are expensive. We also don’t want the cousins to be fancier than the siblings. Adults will wear a gown/long dress if they already own it and want to get use out of it

B'Syata D'Shmya

Sat, Aug 31 2024, 11:16 pm

Whatever the Kallah says. I wouldnt get upset if someone comes in a gown, or doesnt, unexpectedly, lets keep the simcha part in the simcha.

amother

Royalblue

Sat, Aug 31 2024, 11:31 pm

No rules.
When my niece who I'm very close with got engaged, I was going to wear a nice dress and buy my elementary school girls new fancier shabbos dresses. She requested we wear gowns. It meant a lot to her, so we did. Her younger sister who is currently in shidduchim already told me she wants us in gowns whenever.

That said a different niece and also a nephew recently got married. We wore gowns because we thought the family would appreciate it. Some siblings of the parents wore gowns and some didn't.

That said I would not buy expensive. I found really good deals on gowns one at a non jewish wedding store and one an Aliexpress (some sellers will customize, so for a few dollars more, I had it filled in to be tzinius--gown + customization was under $40 and I was told it looked like it was purchased for a few hundred dollars).For my girls I found on amazon and aliexpress. Under $25 each time. Otherwise I would have gone to the gmach.