Compare seminary prices now vs 10 years ago.

↑ Bnei Berak 10

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:19 pm

PinkFridge wrote:

Are we talking sem or sem in EY?
As some say, if a girl is going to go on to a more sophisticated level of general learning, she should invest some time in seminary to learn on a more sophisticated level.

Sem in EY

↑ chestnut ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:23 pm

Chayalle wrote:

I mean no offense. How does a family with a seminary age daughter, and presumably other children as well, live on an income that qualifies for FAFSA? I'm one of 12, and I didn't qualify back in the day. And my parents most definitely were not wealthy.
I'm glad you were able to get financial aid. I apologize for wondering that the auditorium full of girls all fully qualified, with total reporting of income, etc....as I too live in Lakewood, and have heard much while living here.

The same way as a family eligible for Medicaid (adults, not Obama Care) can survive on that income.

amother

↑ Plum ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:24 pm

Cheiny wrote:

This is nothing short of a complete lack of emunah and beyond foolish.
And anyone who thinks they can point to not going to seminary as being the cause of someone getting married later, as if they can make the connection and know the reason, is ridiculous. There are plenty of girls who went to seminary and didn’t get married early too, so should I similarly conclude girls who DO go to seminary don’t get married early?

It’s not the only reason.
Many times it’s the parents who are making everyone crazy. Like no one is good enough for their precious child. Or the kid isn’t mature enough.
Shidduchim come from HaShem. But you have to be open to suggestions. It’s easier to suggest if you know what seminary you went to-typically a girl who went to MMY won’t be looking for the same person as a girl who went to Hadar. Coming from out of town, girls from where I am go to all types of seminaries and if you hear that there’s a girl from my city you might not know where she is hashkafically so asking where she went to seminary is a good way to find out.

↑ chestnut ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:25 pm

amother Pumpkin wrote:

Yes, of course
- Our community is very small, there are an average of 12 kids in a class so our kids have a limited social life. Often they are friends with their friends by default. Many of our daughters need to spread their wings and develop friendships with peers who are more like minded.
- The level of education isn't the highest, especially in Kodesh. Seminary gives them an opportunity to learn on a much higher level and to be exposed to teachers on a completely different caliber.
- For various reasons many of us (and this is not only for BY girls) would like our children to settle in EY and not come back to live here. This is their opportunity to see the land, the life, and hopefully choose to live there.

Last reason aside (and the life they see thru their idealistic 18 y old seminary girl eyes isn't the same as real life), the first two can be done in American in-town seminaries

↑ chestnut ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:27 pm

amother Plum wrote:

Or asking about her now, where she's holding and what she's looking for (her values) are even better predictors of where she's hashkafically than which sem she went to.

amother

↑ Plum ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:01 pm

chestnut wrote:

Or asking about her now, where she's holding and what she's looking for (her values) are even better predictors of where she's hashkafically than which sem she went to.

That’s more helpful for an older single. If you’re looking for the same thing at 23 that you were at 19, that could be a problem

↑ Cheiny

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 7:02 pm

amother Plum wrote:

Seminary isn’t an indication of anything and many times it’s just the parents falling into the trap of not wanting their child to be labeled “different.”

amother

↑ Plum ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 7:21 pm

Cheiny wrote:

Seminary isn’t an indication of anything and many times it’s just the parents falling into the trap of not wanting their child to be labeled “different.”

Disagree. Girls choose seminaries based on where they want to go.

amother

↑ Pumpkin ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 8:51 pm

chestnut wrote:

Last reason aside (and the life they see thru their idealistic 18 y old seminary girl eyes isn't the same as real life), the first two can be done in American in-town seminaries

You're assuming I live in America, which I don't.
I was stating facts, happens to be that all the educators and parents in our community are in agreement. So the opinions of random imamothers aren't needed.
But thanks anyway.

amother

Snow

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 10:34 pm

slushiemom wrote:

This is painful to read - how do parents afford this every couple of years for multiple kids?!

I went 20 years ago, but it was $12K and I remember it was a big jump from HS tuition (Bruriah) which was $8K

Interestingly enough, Bruriah is now about 25k a year which makes the price jump from your tuition then to now about the same difference in seminary prices from then to now

amother

↑ Linen ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 10:51 pm

amother Snow wrote:

Interestingly enough, Bruriah is now about 25k a year which makes the price jump from your tuition then to now about the same difference in seminary prices from then to now

I remember Bruriah increased to $2K about 35 years ago.

amother

↑ Linen ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 10:56 pm

amother Brass wrote:

People should stop sending and then the prices would go down. But everyone is scared to tell their daughter no.

Maybe in some circles. I went but my daughter did not. BH she is married and it made no difference to her husband.

Some girls are as much to blame as the boys. My ds mentioned a girl who would only date a guy who went to two particular Israeli yeshivot. I guess they dont study Torah in the other ones. Rolling Eyes

amother

↑ Linen ↓

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 10:58 pm

amother Brass wrote:

It's up to the child if the parents will spend 30k on them?

You can learn independence living at home too. And many girls in sem aren't really independent swiping daddy's credit card and calling mommy every 5 minutes.

Precisely. When cell phones became ubiquitous, independence went way down.

amother

↑ Linen

Thu, Aug 22 2024, 11:02 pm

amother Brass wrote:

Re the bolded: the poster said her dd had been on trips there a few times, so I think money no object for her family.

↑ B'Syata D'Shmya

Fri, Aug 23 2024, 12:40 am

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

Could you shout it out loud so that everyone will hear it loud and clear?
Could someone please tell me why sem would be such a huge deal breaker?

No need to shout, anyone with a sliver of Bitachon, knows Hashem runs the world. If you are rejected because of something so silly and shallow as how you chose to spend your year after HS, then the boy isnt for you. Hashem is doing you a favor by weeding them out.

amother

↑ Glitter ↓

Fri, Aug 23 2024, 12:48 am

amother Linen wrote:

Precisely. When cell phones became ubiquitous, independence went way down.

So true. I remember the good ol days standing at a phone booth in the street in middle of the night, trying to get an overseas operator to make the call home, most of the time it didnt go through. The calls were short as they were expensive. If you were a needy, immature individual you didnt go to sem in those years. Who came with a credit card? If you had a working camera, you were well-off. If you had relatives, you were lucky.