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Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
Is it embarrassing not to tip??
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amother
Tuberose


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 12:40 pm
Molly Weasley wrote:
You can’t change the world.
As a parent it’s up to you to show appreciation for the people who worked with your daughter. The fact that the camp is shrinking from their obligations doesn’t diminish yours.

I don't tip. I/my kids show appreciation by writing a thank you card & giving it with a chocolate bar.
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  Molly Weasley  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 1:01 pm
amother Tuberose wrote:
I don't tip. I/my kids show appreciation by writing a thank you card & giving it with a chocolate bar.


That's beautiful!

Im sure it was appreciated.
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amother
Hotpink


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 1:15 pm
I agree the tipping is out of hand.
I never used to, but now that my children are older they tell me that they see it differently. They work very hard and very much appreciate the tips when they put in so much effort as counselors, so I give the suggested amounts. Yes, its crazy. Yes, I do it. Yes, its a financial strain. I don't have answers only questions. I don't know why a rebbe has to get $40 for 4 weeks of summer when they are there for such a short time. I don't know why an 8th grade JC needs $20 from every parent for one half. But I give it and I write a nice note. I just complain here to get it out of my system Smile
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amother
Babypink  


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 4:44 pm
I don't tip. Tipping has gotten out of hand. Every single helper, assistant and staff member expects tips. Not just camp but at schools and everywhere else too. OTs and SLPs want YT tips now too. And I pay them directly!!
I can't afford it.
If teens stop agreeing to work for nothing then places will actually have to pay them.

In terms of adults- I don't expect or get given any tips at my workplace. I make a massive difference in my clients lives. I get paid peanuts but I agreed to accept that salary when I accepted the job. I don't like it? I find a better job.

It has gotten out of hand completely.
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flowerpower




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 4:48 pm
My mother instilled in us a few strong things and one thing is tipping. I tipped first half and tipped this week again. You don’t have to give a lot. Any amount is fine. I know how much it means to those interacting with my child
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GLUE  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:00 pm
Lakewood two kids was JC this summer

My son was in a big camp and got $80
My daughter was in a backyard camp and got lots of Chocolate and Sour sticks.
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amother
NeonBlue  


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:03 pm
GLUE wrote:
Lakewood two kids was JC this summer

My son was in a big camp and got $80
My daughter was in a backyard camp and got lots of Chocolate and Sour sticks.


I don't understand why ppl give chocolate and sour sticks. Give $5 it will be more appreciated. The kids want cash not junk food.
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amother
Geranium


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:16 pm
Are you embarrassed not to tip because you don’t want to look cheap/poor or like you have a lack of hakarat hatov?

B”H I have never been in the position that I couldn’t find the money to do something, even if that meant I myself was eating cereal for dinner or forgoing something for myself (not on my kids chesbon).
I would be perfectly happy sending a note and a chocolate bar, showing hakarat hatov. To me, being poor is from Hashem and not an embarrassment, but having bad middot is.
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amother
Starflower  


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:38 pm
I agree that it's on the daycamp to offer the counselors a normal wage out of the huge amount they're charging us. "Counselors get paid so little, they're counting on tips" is not a valid reasoning. If my doctor pays his receptionist too little, I should not have to tip to make up for that. She should insist on a normal salary.

Tips should be only as a mark of appreciation. In which case money is but one valid way to show appreciation and if you want to do other ways, you can. We should all show appreciation to anyone who earned it.
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amother
Midnight


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 5:57 pm
amother Starflower wrote:
I agree that it's on the daycamp to offer the counselors a normal wage out of the huge amount they're charging us. "Counselors get paid so little, they're counting on tips" is not a valid reasoning. If my doctor pays his receptionist too little, I should not have to tip to make up for that. She should insist on a normal salary.

Tips should be only as a mark of appreciation. In which case money is but one valid way to show appreciation and if you want to do other ways, you can. We should all show appreciation to anyone who earned it.


Do you tip the manicurist?
The waiter?
The instacart delivery person?
The mover?
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amother
Bisque  


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:27 pm
I would have loved to tip but really don’t have the means to this summer…


Instead, I got each a treat (drink & danish) the day after Tisha b’av and wrote a personal thank you.
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amother
Eggshell  


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:31 pm
Yes I tip because Bh I can afford to and think its nice to show hakaras hatov and want to be a good role model for my children.
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amother
  Eggshell


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:33 pm
Our camps had suggested amounts and I did that. Think if you can its the right thing to do. If you can't thats another story. If you can afford to just don't because you don't want to I don't think that is right.
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amother
  NeonBlue  


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:33 pm
amother Bisque wrote:
I would have loved to tip but really don’t have the means to this summer…


Instead, I got each a treat (drink & danish) the day after Tisha b’av and wrote a personal thank you.


A treat costs $5 why don't you just give $5 instead?
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amother
Strawberry


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:35 pm
amother Midnight wrote:
Do you tip the manicurist?
The waiter?
The instacart delivery person?
The mover?


These are all luxuries. I don't get manicures, never go to restaurants, don't use instacart, and when we moved dh rented a Uhaul and we did it ourselves. If you can afford these luxuries then you can afford to tip

Day camp is not a luxury for full time working parents. Many parents cannot afford it but have no choice and certainly don't have a penny for extras like tips
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amother
Yolk


 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:38 pm
It should be illegal to tip.
I’m one who can afford generous tips and usually do so. I clearly see a difference in how my child gets treated accordingly. It makes me extremely uncomfortable. It should be against the law.
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Cheiny  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:43 pm
amother OP wrote:
I always tipped and lately I just don't want to.
It's not just the $ amount per counselor, madrich, bus driver, bus teacher, etc. Even if I'm not too generous it still adds up to a few hundred per tipping season. And this is after paying for daycamp.

First half I didn't tip but now I'm feeling uncomfortable.
My dd also yelled at me that she's embarrassed not to tip her counselors.
So I guess I just gotta shell out a few hundred dollars now when I have a ton of expenses right now.

So my question is-is it embarrassing not to tip?


Forget about embarrasing, it’s not mentshlich to not tip. These people work hard, many rely on the tips because the salaries are small, and they deserve it as well as a show of gratitude.
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  Cheiny  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:44 pm
amother OP wrote:
I rather not tip than tip small amounts. I'm embarrassed.


I disagree, it’s much better to give $5 and a nice note than just to ignore them.
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  Cheiny  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:46 pm
amother Mistyrose wrote:
I send my kids (young) to backyard camps for 8 weeks. It’s a little frustrating to me that the most of the counselors only stay for one half so I end up needing to tip twice even though it’s the same camp. …


You’re not paying twice as much, you just give the ones who only work for half the summer half the amount you’d give those who stay for the whole.
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  Cheiny  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 22 2024, 6:48 pm
amother Babypink wrote:
I don't tip. Tipping has gotten out of hand. Every single helper, assistant and staff member expects tips.
If teens stop agreeing to work for nothing then places will actually have to pay them.
.


That’s a very poor justification.
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