S\O one sided double take

GLUE ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 1:50 am

Double take has been running for a few years, which ones do you think are one sided?

-I think the one where a group of young mothers build a playground on the land that Mesivta boys used as their playground and then tried to ban the boys from playing there.
I love the comment,"We will build a place that all ages can enjoy" and then forgot to build anything for Mesivta boys.

amother

Nemesia ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 7:45 am

The pool one - the lady who was allowing her neighbor to use the pool did absolutely nothing wrong.

The recent therapist one- the therapist was blameless as well.

singleagain ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 7:53 am

The one where the rabbi randomly bc he didn't like recent wedding DJ decided to outlaw DJs right after someone in his community had just signed a contract with a DJ... And if I remember most the site thought that was wrong

ETA. I was thinking of the lady who didn't want internet in her house but used her neighbor's internet almost every day . That's the one most of the site was on the lady with internet.

amother

↑ Petunia ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:05 am

The one that jumps out as the least one sided was the Shavous program story, where there was another program happening in a shul right under the noses of the Rav and old timers who felt it was ruining their YT.

amother

Opal

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:07 am

amother Petunia wrote:

The crazy amount of food being served at the young Shavuous party did slant it toward one side.

amother

↑ Nemesia ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:19 am

The one where the rich brother invited his parents and his sisters to come for Pesach, including the married sister and her family who came from EY. He was totally blameless and the sisters were acting like selfish brats.

↑ singleagain ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:22 am

amother Nemesia wrote:

No way ... He could have at least let the sisters know the plan before hand instead of springing it on them.

amother

↑ Aqua ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:22 am

amother Opal wrote:

The crazy amount of food being served at the young Shavuous party did slant it toward one side.

It was one-sided: the older generation was wrong

amother

↑ Aqua ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:23 am

singleagain wrote:

No way ... He could have at least let the sisters know the plan before hand instead of springing it on them.

He didn’t make the plan, he just invited everyone and their parents made the arrangements without discussing it. The only people wrong in that situation were the parents for not handling any of it correctly

He was being a good son though and did nothing wrong

mha3484 ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:24 am

amother Petunia wrote:

The cousin's club was fairly one sided. The aunts and younger cousins did nothing wrong other then asking the absent parents to be more present.

I disagree. I think the sisters and sisters in law were not nice to her. If she did everything right to keep her boys fully entertained all shabbos they likely would not have interacted with her at all.

amother

↑ Petunia ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:25 am

amother Aqua wrote:

It was one-sided: the older generation was wrong

I hear both sides and I don't think the older generation was so wrong. This was an established shul that they built up with an older Rav. They felt that the younger ones were disrespectful. I can understand that.

amother

↑ Aqua ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:26 am

chanatron1000 wrote:

Of Two Minds

I think Yonah was absolutely in the wrong to unilaterally make the decision for his mother (Kayla's grandmother) not to attend the wedding.

He doesn’t own the mother, he gave his opinion and nobody thought to offer an alternative. Instead everybody let it happen then sulk afterwards

The kallahs mother should have suggested instead someone take the grandmother to the before the wedding for pictures, when it’s fairly calm and empty, then have her leave before the wedding started

But if it was just her going to the wedding vs not going- no she should not have gone

amother

↑ Aqua

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:28 am

amother Petunia wrote:

They were stubborn and if they had their way the shul would die with them. I know of more than a few shuls going through this now. Used to have hundreds of members and are down to the last 30, because the original members are too stubborn to make any changes or appeal to the younger crowd so the younger crowd finds somewhere else

At the end of the day, even if it’s frustrating or disappointing that things are changing, a group of younger guys having their version of a nice shavuos are not being “disrespectful” just because the older generation doesn’t agree with it

amother

↑ Nemesia ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:31 am

singleagain wrote:

No way ... He could have at least let the sisters know the plan before hand instead of springing it on them.

It was the mothers job to do that. Or maybe he thought the mother told them.

amother

↑ Nemesia ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:36 am

amother Aqua wrote:

As the wife of a rav in a similar situation, I see this differently.
There will always be a younger generation of more serious guys who will gravitate to the serious rav and the shul that has a more serious vibe. The shul that does not tolerate talking while davening and doesn't lower itself to allow anything to go, who maintains a high level of shiurim and decorum.
The other guys will leave and form their own minyan or join like minded guys looking for a different experience.

↑ singleagain ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:37 am

amother Nemesia wrote:

It was the mothers job to do that. Or maybe he thought the mother told them.

He was doing everything else, he should have have said something.

sequoia ↓

Tue, Aug 20 2024, 8:49 am

To be honest most of them are one-sided.

The most egregious was the therapist whose mother died, that was just beyond the pale. I think the writer meant for it to be extremely one-sided because the patient said something like “big deal, she was probably old, everyone dies.” That level of narcissism and self-absorption isn’t meant to be okay.