Can’t afford fancy shabbos foods

agreer

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 9:22 am

It LITERALLY says in Pirkei Avos, "Aseh Shabbosos Kevah"... Make your Shabbos simple, and don't rely on handouts.

YOU OP are doing the right thing.

amother

Impatiens

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 9:26 am

amother Linen wrote:

I’m having
Challah and homemade sourdough
Chummus and sautéed eggplant
Chicken soup
Brownies

Chulent
Deli roll
Turkey salad
Brownies and fruit

Am I a nebach? Idk my kids 1-11 are very happy

Sounds like very delicious and plentiful meals!

amother

Sienna

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 9:32 am

Hashem decides how much money you'll have. He also doesn't charge for food l'kavod shabbos. I'm far from rich but I go shopping as if things are free when it comes to shabbos. I'm still sensible, I don't get things that I know won't get eaten or something I can easily make myself.

amother

Bottlebrush

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 9:33 am

OP
I'm in the same boat.
We only have meat yt.
Here's what I do, make my own dips....I buy the produce when on sale and make a lot and freeze ex mushroom dip, eggplant dip, matbucha, garlic confit so I'm not making it wkly which is a hastle.
I make hummus wkly (costs v little).
and we have 1 or 2 dips total a wk (sometimes 3 if guests).

regarding buying something lekovod shabbos, when my kids were little I bought a pack of candy and a pack of nuts for the shabbos table to make it special .
now they are older I get nice snacks for shbabos afternoon while we reading and sitting around. doesn't have to be a fortune like this and is still lekovod shabbos.

hope this helps.

also to add the shabbos flavour is more in the atmosphere at the shabbos table than the food, songs, divrei Torah, games, etc.

amother

Gold

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 9:35 am

mfb wrote:

Also remember everyone prioritizes different things to spend on.
One on better clothing
Another on better shoes
More food
Cleaning help
Car
Ubers……
So the person spending on these foods might be saving on something else you do spend on

This!
We love going on fun family vacations, and giving our kids private skating lessons.
But we dont use a cleaning lady.
See? You can be jealous that we do vacations, or you can be happy that you have a cleaning lady. (Im not saying you do, im just saying often you only see one aspect, not the whole picture)

amother

Daffodil

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 9:39 am

I don’t know if this is helpful
But I make my own dips

Matbucha -
Tomato paste
Onion
Garlic
canned diced tomato with juice
Chili flakes - optional
Cayane - optional
Salt
Pepper

Hummus
Chickpeas
Chick pea water from the can
Oil
Cumin
Salt

Others cost more, but still much more economical then buying it
I can’t understand how ppl can spend $7/$8/$10 for a small tub which costs 1/5(or even less)
And it’s not so hard to make

As far as meat- I do splurge and buy meat.
I make sure to make 2 cheaper meals during the week to afford meat for Shabbos.

amother

↑ Linen

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 10:34 am

amother Linen wrote:

I’m having
Challah and homemade sourdough
Chummus and sautéed eggplant
Chicken soup
Brownies

Chulent
Deli roll
Turkey salad
Brownies and fruit

Am I a nebach? Idk my kids 1-11 are very happy

lol on the two hugs! We are ll quite fine Ty.
Truthfully if I ever make anything past the soup no one is able to eat it bec we are too full. And we all don’t like fish and it’s not our minhag that h have to have.

amother

↑ Whitesmoke

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 10:35 am

amother Gold wrote:

same! we take vacations and clean our own home

amother

Catmint

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 10:45 am

We don’t have food stamps are middle class and have a plain Shabbos. Didn’t even know this is a thing. And I live in Lakewood. Never seen anyone I knew serve all of that nor have I seen carts full of it.

amother

Mintgreen

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 10:52 am

amother Linen wrote:

I didn't hug you but I don't think it's because they feel sorry for your kids, but because this is by all measures a completely normal meal, likely even larger than average and definitely larger than what OP is talking about.

amother

Tanzanite

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 10:53 am

We actually splurge on Shabbos because my husband’s Rav says that’s the right thing to do. We are not on food stamps and are just barely making it financially. We have many guests, so we buy a variety of things, I’ll make schnitzel and also a brisket or roast for example. And then we eat leftovers for 2-3 nights afterwards.

Everyone does things differently, it doesn’t mean there’s no cheshbon or thought going into it.

HKBH pays for Shabbos and Yom tov expenses - it’s on His cheshbon, and we have seen this somehow work out for us. Obviously it’s still within reason - not spending thousands or buying every single thing we see. But we do spend more than we would for almost anything else. We live frugally otherwise.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 11:06 am

Bh I can afford- Sorry if I gave the wrong impression! Just not all the dips and finger foods and fancy meats I see ppl around me are buying that are ready made
But bh I can afford to make my shabbos special! I bought a small pack of ground beef for $9 (we’re only 2 ppl eating) and used it for meatballs for the cholent and added eggs, potatos, chickpeas and mushrooms.
For tonight I did honey roasted carrots, homemade lachmagine, rice, and chicken.
and there’s leftover meat for next week;)

amother

Tealblue ↓

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 11:53 am

I get you.
I buy sales and watch what I spend.

I see the takeout stores sell and cannot figure out who is buying all of it.

I see people loading up the carts with so much really expensive food. And really can’t figure it out.

amother

↑ Tealblue

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 11:55 am

cnc wrote:

For all those posting that they make and freeze their own dips - can you post recipes?

I don’t freeze - but this is super fancy.

Roast eggplant halves. Slightly mash but keep eggplant shape.
Serve drizzled with lots of home made techina.
Spice with zatar, cumin, smoke paprika, salt
Sprinkle with toppings. Like seeds (whatever you have, pumpkin, sunflower, sesame) , roasted chickpeas, nuts, etc.
serve on a platter. Looks so fancy and delicious.

amother

Periwinkle

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 12:00 pm

The fact is, we aren't fancy people. We don't like those tastes. If I bought it, no one would eat it anyway.

amother

cornflower

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 12:16 pm

The fact is that I have food stamps. For a family of 10 I get very little money. I can't afford to buy these things either. I make my dips at home and don't buy any expensive meats or dips or nosh.
What does food stamps have to do with people loading up their carts?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 12:21 pm

amother cornflower wrote:

Idk a lot of the ppl I see doing that are kollel or don’t look like they have money for it. So I’m assuming they have food stamps obv I don’t know for sure

Snickers18

Fri, Aug 16 2024, 1:08 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thanks everyone
I feel a little better
You’re right I can make a lot of these things at home. I just didn’t think about it until I was in the store, and I felt bad
I just started making shabbos myself so it’s a learning curve
Thanks for all these great ideas

Once you start making yourself, you will see how homemade dips are a fraction of the cost of store bought ones. We have several dips but I never balked at the price because they’re all homemade.