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Forum
-> Working Women
amother
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 Fri, Aug 16 2024, 12:24 am
To thank me for joining the company and tell me how appreciated I am etc.
I have done a lot of extra work for her on the side (paid assignments, but it was still a big burden off her shoulders and not part of my job description at all) but I don’t honestly feel that different from any other employee. Perhaps she sends to us all?
Anyway, twas very sweet.
She’s a bit old fashioned, I feel like I’m not from her generation and don’t know how to react.
What is my response meant to be?
Do I text her - thanks for the nice note?
Do I call her?
Do I just appreciate it quietly and move on?
A face to face verbal thanks is not an option- she’s away for two weeks, so I’d feel weird acknowledging it so late.
I’m at a loss, can anyone older help me out?
In general, if someone sends a thank you card in the mail - am I meant to acknowledge it?
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amother
Ecru
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 1:05 am
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I think the polite thing would be to give some kind of acknowledgement of receiving it. So if she's away, makes sense to send a short text thanking her for the lovely note.
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abbie
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 1:24 am
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I would definitely acknowledge it. A text to say thank you would be the polite way to go.
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amother
Puce
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 5:53 am
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So nice. I wish my boss would appreciate me
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tweety1
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 6:21 am
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Usually we read on here about this terrible boss and about that terrible boss. Here you have coming on and saying just the opposite. It's so nice to read something different and something positive for a change.
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amother
Firethorn
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 6:52 am
A thank you for a thank you?!
I never respond to thank you cards. Never heard of your welcome cards
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giftedmom
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 7:05 am
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If she’s old fashioned she will appreciate a call. So sweet from the title I was afraid this would be about a male boss crossing boundaries.
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amother
Jasmine
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 7:08 am
| giftedmom wrote: | | If she’s old fashioned she will appreciate a call. So sweet from the title I was afraid this would be about a male boss crossing boundaries. |
Omg Me too!
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amother
Hawthorn
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 7:09 am
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I would send a text, I got your note. It was so nice and appreciated. I'm enjoying the position and look forward to getting to know everyone better/a nice working relationship/whatever else is appropriate.
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amother
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 8:59 am
So the thing is that now that that I think about it, I wonder if she feels guilty because she sort of led me to believe I’ll be getting a quasi promotion (being able to take on some of the extra assignments in a more official capacity), and then she gave it to someone else.
I am not yet ready to be upfront with her (like please don’t lead me on next time), but a part of me is wondering if that’s why she sent it - maybe she feels guilty?
It’s hard for me to say “thank you for the nice note” if I feel that it may be a way for her to ensure that I don’t up and leave.
I don’t plan to go anywhere, the pay is decent and I’m not experienced enough yet to get a similar position elsewhere.
But I don’t like feeling played with. I’d much rather straight communication (I’m sorry that we couldn’t promote you as I had intimated earlier in the year, with thought I realized we’d prefer someone more experienced…or something like that) than a flowery note gushing about my worth and her appreciation.
And I’m just trying to understand what her expectations are regarding the note. Is she expecting a call or text? Or is it just a nice gesture to acknowledge it? (Uchh, I hate etiquette so much!)
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amother
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 9:03 am
| tweety1 wrote: | | Usually we read on here about this terrible boss and about that terrible boss. Here you have coming on and saying just the opposite. It's so nice to read something different and something positive for a change. |
She is very sweet BH! Really a quality person.
I just think she tries to avoid anything sticky and instead tries to overcompensate with gifts, notes and the like. And I’m maybe just more straightforward than that.
Not complaining, she really is pleasant to work for and I’m very lucky! And I’m sure there are many more like her out there, people only come on here to resolve a problem.
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amother
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 9:05 am
| giftedmom wrote: | | If she’s old fashioned she will appreciate a call. So sweet from the title I was afraid this would be about a male boss crossing boundaries. |
I see what you mean about the title, lol.
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tichellady
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 9:15 am
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I would email her thanking her for the note and saying you have learned a lot from working with her.
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amother
Camellia
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 10:19 am
| amother OP wrote: | So the thing is that now that that I think about it, I wonder if she feels guilty because she sort of led me to believe I’ll be getting a quasi promotion (being able to take on some of the extra assignments in a more official capacity), and then she gave it to someone else.
I am not yet ready to be upfront with her (like please don’t lead me on next time), but a part of me is wondering if that’s why she sent it - maybe she feels guilty?
It’s hard for me to say “thank you for the nice note” if I feel that it may be a way for her to ensure that I don’t up and leave.
I don’t plan to go anywhere, the pay is decent and I’m not experienced enough yet to get a similar position elsewhere.
But I don’t like feeling played with. I’d much rather straight communication (I’m sorry that we couldn’t promote you as I had intimated earlier in the year, with thought I realized we’d prefer someone more experienced…or something like that) than a flowery note gushing about my worth and her appreciation.
And I’m just trying to understand what her expectations are regarding the note. Is she expecting a call or text? Or is it just a nice gesture to acknowledge it? (Uchh, I hate etiquette so much!) |
Any colleague you can shmooze with and see between the lines if this is typical for her to do?
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amother
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 11:01 am
| amother Camellia wrote: | | Any colleague you can shmooze with and see between the lines if this is typical for her to do? |
That’s a good suggestion. I’ve been trying to decide if/who to ask. I don’t know anyone that well yet, and I don’t want to bring this up with the wrong person.
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tichellady
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Fri, Aug 16 2024, 11:11 am
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If you want to talk about the lack of promotion set up a meeting with her. The response to this card is not meant to be about that. Just email her a polite response and separate the two things in your head
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