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-> Parenting our children
amother
Mintgreen
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Tue, Aug 06 2024, 12:40 pm
Are any of you actually fasting đđđ I don't think any of these activities would work for me because it's too much while fasting. Except for screen time.
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amother
Firethorn
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Tue, Aug 06 2024, 1:51 pm
Ahhh I remember those day, three little boys those same ages, one with ADHD, two who always fought...
The only fast days I ever felt were successful from my end were the ones where I got together with a friend who had kids similar ages for most of it. The kids kept each other entertained, and there was another adult so we could tag team each other when we wanted to. Best to be a mom friend who is on the same page as you, so if you want to have Tisha-B'Av-related talk, she should too. And if you want to shmooze about nothing to keep yourself "entertained" so time doesn't go as slowly, she should be on the same page.
Of course, most of the time I didn't have someone like that, whose kids matched up perfectly with mine. The one time I did was when were working in a different city for the summer near where my SIL lived. But boy was that Tisha B'Av worthwhile.
Other thoughts: I found incentives just for Tisha B'av to be helpful. THings like filling up a jar with objects, one at a time, each time that the boys did something positive. And I'd really search for positive, even something like sitting on the couch together for two minutes without fighting over space was a win. And if they got the prize quickly (ha!), I'd have a secondary prize lined up for afterwards.
I also spoke with my husband beforehand about what the afternoon would look like. As in, he'd been at shul all morning and when he came home he wanted a break, but I'd been with the kids all morning and felt the same way. If we'd tried to discuss it that day when we were both hungry and tired and worn out, it would have ended badly. So we discussed it ahead of time, obviously understanding that if someone was really struggling we'd both be flexible, but making sure that both of us should ideally have some time to relax, and that I should have some time to either listen to a shiur on tisha b'av or read through a kinnos, something like that so I felt that it was actually Tisha B'Av and not just a looong day of childcare with a nap thrown in and no food.
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amother
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Tue, Aug 06 2024, 3:49 pm
amother Mintgreen wrote: | Are any of you actually fasting đđđ I don't think any of these activities would work for me because it's too much while fasting. Except for screen time. |
I make myself a nest on the playroom floor with my box of new activities. They know on the hour every hour they get to have a snack and then pick an activity from the box or screen time. After the activity/screen time is done they have to go play with something they have until the next time the big hand goes straight up.
(No, they donât actually choose a snack every hour, yes I do actually buy 12 new things, but some are things like mini slinkyâs Or a light up ball from the dollar store or a new accessory for an existent toy)
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amother
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Tue, Aug 06 2024, 8:28 pm
You donât like anything suggested?
Itâs basically a day for lots of arts n crafts, appropriate videos, outdoor play if not too hot.
I try to stay out of the kitchen. I tell the kids what theyâll be eating for breakfast, lunch and supper before the fast starts so they donât expect much. (Crackers, yogurt, leben, sandwiches, noodle soup, cereal, grilled cheese⌠no cooking for me)
Itâs one day and it will pass⌠it always does
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amother
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Tue, Aug 06 2024, 9:19 pm
amother Calendula wrote: | I make myself a nest on the playroom floor with my box of new activities. They know on the hour every hour they get to have a snack and then pick an activity from the box or screen time. After the activity/screen time is done they have to go play with something they have until the next time the big hand goes straight up.
(No, they donât actually choose a snack every hour, yes I do actually buy 12 new things, but some are things like mini slinkyâs Or a light up ball from the dollar store or a new accessory for an existent toy) |
In case it helps anyone, our 12 new activities: (note, my kids are more into arts and crafts than OPs, so this may not be for her)
1) mini slinkyâs.
2) sticker by number
3) slime (on porch or plastic table cloth)
4) kinetic sand (porch or plastic table cloth)
5) a bag of paper towel and toilet paper rolls (idk why my kids love these, but they do, so I save them for a few months and it keeps them busy)
6) mondo llama craft kit
7) make your own bouncy ball kit (this one needs a bit more help from me but keeps them busy playing for so long)
8) those electronic pop it games
9) a new Lego set
10) some cool new pieces to go with their magnatiles- this year is a few cars)
11) a set of age appropriate puzzles
12) model magic
They also can choose screen time for half an hour instead of a new activity a few times a day, but they only do about twice.
I also only give out snacks at the hour mark before a new game, not when theyâre just bored because they finished the cool new activity- then theyâre expected to go find something to play that they have already
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amother
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Tue, Aug 06 2024, 9:36 pm
For older kids, some families do a large puzzle in the afternoon and glue it to hang up.
Many people like to bake and spend the day in the kitchen. I donât like being in the kitchen on fast days until right before the fast is over but many people do enjoy baking all afternoon.
I used to buy a new expensive toy like playmobil to keep my kids busy on Yom Kippur. For Tisha BâAv itâs more arts n crafts and play dough- things that are muktza.
Walk up and down the aisles of amazing savings or dollar tree and stock up on some fun things to keep everyone busy.
If you can take them outside itâs the best.
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amother
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Tue, Aug 06 2024, 9:42 pm
Beautiful wrote: | I'm not a fan of parking kids in front of screens, but on Tisha bAv we watch the virtual Tisha bav camp. It's produced by Chabad affiliated people but fairly parve | was going to post this as well. My kids loved it and I thought it was very well done. We are not Chabad. I got an email that is it going to be 2:00-6:00 EST this year.
LINK:
https://kidschitas.org/kidschitas/camp/
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amother
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Tue, Aug 06 2024, 9:48 pm
Boys 7 and 10 are probably the right age for the Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation Childrenâs video- usually about middos. In the past, they have only been shown live and not online. I think itâs worth calling and finding out if itâs online this year or if it is being shown in your area. Would get them out a little
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amother
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Wed, Aug 07 2024, 9:43 am
A lot of people gave you good ideas already. It would be nice to say âthank you so much. Iâll implement xyz. Abc wouldnât work, because of ____. Anyone have any more ideas?â
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amother
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Wed, Aug 07 2024, 9:54 am
Iâm so glad you posted this I was looking for this and I only found last yearâs.
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HakarasHatov
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Wed, Aug 07 2024, 2:38 pm
amother Ballota wrote: | Boys 7 and 10 are probably the right age for the Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation Childrenâs video- usually about middos. In the past, they have only been shown live and not online. I think itâs worth calling and finding out if itâs online this year or if it is being shown in your area. Would get them out a little | I found the videos on mostlymusic.com does anyone know how long each one typically is?
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amother
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Thu, Aug 08 2024, 8:14 pm
Im not OP. Just to explain myself, I wanted to bump it one more time to get more ideas (which some did add) before I thanked everyone. Not sure why the passive aggressive critism. There are hundreds of people who visit the site and each person has their own experience of what works for their family I.e. arts n crafts can mean creating a beis hamildash vs buying the target activities or baking can mean frozen pizza dough and creating creative easy lunch vs making a complicated dessert đ¤ˇââď¸
post easily make it to page 3-4 depending how polpular and I wanted to get more ideas hours later so thats why I bumped it.
Im a terrible faster and have anxiety from it and have a couple of young kids. Dh helps a lot but he is fasting too and we dont plan on sending them to a Tisha Bav day camp. Please dont knock me down. Any ideas are helpful.
For the person who included links of toys, that was very much appreciated! And for those that listed various activities, it definitely gives me ideas of what may work for my family
Personally, I was thinking taking out books (including ones with cd so they could follow along) and family friendly DVDs from the library (saves on cost), baking (maybe pizza dough or cake box mixes...). From these ideas, I will likely buy playmobile or lego and maybe a target arts n crafts.
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