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Why do we have deep urges to BUY BUY BUY?
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thegiver  




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 7:16 pm
I feel like spending all my free time shopping. It must be a form of avodah Zara distracting from avodas Hashem. What is this mad consumerism?

Any good explanations?
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write4right




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 7:21 pm
Because we're in this world to acquire more and more spiritual possessions, but we often express that in buying stuff.

ETA: I think I heard this from Rav Avigdor Miller


Last edited by write4right on Sun, Jun 30 2024, 7:34 pm; edited 1 time in total
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pinkpeonies




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 7:32 pm
write4right wrote:
Because we're in this world to acquire more and more spiritual possessions, but we often express that in buying stuff.


Wow!!!
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allthingsblue  




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 7:35 pm
Read the second perek of Yeshaya

Hint: materialism is the nisayon of the generation before the geulah comes
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Goldengoose




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 7:51 pm
allthingsblue wrote:
Read the second perek of Yeshaya

Hint: materialism is the nisayon of the generation before the geulah comes


that brings me comfort. thank you.
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steak4me




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 8:00 pm
thegiver wrote:
I feel like spending all my free time shopping. It must be a form of avodah Zara distracting from avodas Hashem. What is this mad consumerism?

Any good explanations?


Ahhh that’s where the name Zara comes from. I was wondering
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mom2mysouls  




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 8:01 pm
My neighbor claims that buying something gives you a quick high, and people that are generally not so happy, are the ones shopping daily.

IMO I think today's stuff are so junky that a pair of shoes that once lasted almost a full year doesn't last anymore. Same for clothing. Everything is cheap quality.

But it's also possible that there are so many items/ideas (seen on social media) easily acquired through Amazon etc. Shopping is easy, and everyone is upgrading with more modern and cool stuff. People just feel like going along with the trend.
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TheCoolMom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 8:13 pm
Such beautiful explanations!
Now I need to check out all the carts on my browsing tabs. See you in $7000 from now.
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  allthingsblue




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 8:24 pm
Goldengoose wrote:
that brings me comfort. thank you.


Read the perek before you take comfort.

It was musar from a Navi.
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advocate




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 30 2024, 9:42 pm
I think another idea I've heard is that women have the power of newness, and that desire is (mis)channeled into shopping.
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zaq  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 01 2024, 11:02 am
My thoughts:
1. Because you look at stuff. Velo taturu acharei levavchem veacharei EINEICHEM. The eye sees, the heart desires.

2. Because you read or listen to advertisements designed to seduce you into believing that if only you had that vacation home in Sudan/Wives Scent LowRent rattlesnake skin toothbrush holder/Squid ink skin cream / James Bond 007 escape vehicle/platinum necklace with genuine moon rock pendant and matching bracelet with a chunk of the Berlin Wall, you would look, feel, and be beautiful, rich, s*xy, brilliant, popular and successful.

3. Because you don't think before you buy or are so disorganized that you don't remember what you have and therefore always buy more.

4. Because you lack self-esteem and secretly believe that having stuff buys you respect.

5. Because you lack values and openly believe that having stuff makes you respectable.

6. Because there is something lacking in your life, and the temporary joy you feel when you acquire stuff is your unconscious attempt to make up for that lack.

7. Because you were truly poor in your early life and are trying to make up for it now.

8. Because you have terminal FOMO and live in terror of not having precisely the right thing when you want it.


Last edited by zaq on Mon, Jul 01 2024, 3:54 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Bnei Berak 10  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 01 2024, 11:19 am
mom2mysouls wrote:
My neighbor claims that buying something gives you a quick high, and people that are generally not so happy, are the ones shopping daily.

IMO I think today's stuff are so junky that a pair of shoes that once lasted almost a full year doesn't last anymore. Same for clothing. Everything is cheap quality.

But it's also possible that there are so many items/ideas (seen on social media) easily acquired through Amazon etc. Shopping is easy, and everyone is upgrading with more modern and cool stuff. People just feel like going along with the trend.

Your neighbour is correct. There are scientific studies.
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  Bnei Berak 10  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 01 2024, 11:24 am
zaq wrote:
My thoughts:
1. Because you look at stuff. Velo taturu acharei levavchem veacharei EINEICHEM. The eye sees, the heart desires.

2. Because you read or listen to advertisements designed to seduce you into believing that if only you had that vacation home in Sudan/Wives Scent LowRent rattlesnake skin toothbrush holder/Squid ink skin cream / James Bond 007 escape vehicle/platinum necklace with genuine moon rock pendant and matching bracelet with a chunk of the Berlin Wall, you would look, feel, and be beautiful, rich, s*xy, brilliant, popular and successful.

3. Because you don't think before you buy or are so disorganized that you remember what you have and therefore always buy more.

4. Because you lack self-esteem and secretly believe that having stuff buys you respect.

5. Because you lack values and openly believe that having stuff makes you respectable.

6. Because there is something lacking in your life, and the temporary joy you feel when you acquire stuff is your unconscious attempt to make up for that lack.

7. Because you were truly poor in your early life and are trying to make up for it now.

8. Because you have terminal FOMO and live in terror of not having precisely the right thing when you want it.

THIS
May I add: The 'Why not?' mindsetting. A frugal person needs a good reason why an item needs to be bought.
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  Bnei Berak 10  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 01 2024, 11:27 am
thegiver wrote:
I feel like spending all my free time shopping. It must be a form of avodah Zara distracting from avodas Hashem. What is this mad consumerism?

Any good explanations?

Kudos for being so brutally honest!
What are you shopping?
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  thegiver  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 01 2024, 8:04 pm
advocate wrote:
I think another idea I've heard is that women have the power of newness, and that desire is (mis)channeled into shopping.


Please explain
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penguin




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 02 2024, 3:32 am
Rabbanit Yemima says if you're sad, pick yourself up and go shopping! Of course I am sure she means within your budget, otherwise you'll end up sadder...
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  mom2mysouls




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 02 2024, 11:02 am
Bnei Berak 10 wrote:
Your neighbour is correct. There are scientific studies.


Agree.
But even though I'm a content person, those containers that fit my shelf perfectly make me happier every day. Things look neat and organized.
Like everything in life, shopping needs a balance.
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  zaq  




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 02 2024, 12:23 pm
Speak for yourself. Not everyone is cursed with a yetzer hara for this.
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  Bnei Berak 10




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 02 2024, 12:55 pm
mom2mysouls wrote:
Agree.
But even though I'm a content person, those containers that fit my shelf perfectly make me happier every day. Things look neat and organized.
Like everything in life, shopping needs a balance.

Balance is the key word.
I'm trying to implement "if it will have a purpose and a use it's existence is justified.
I get a small thin rubber mat as a gift to facilitate opening difficult lids. It's *bright orange*. I absolutely hate orange with all my heart and soul. It survives and thrives in my drawer only because it's useful.
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Cheiny




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 02 2024, 1:18 pm
mom2mysouls wrote:
My neighbor claims that buying something gives you a quick high, and people that are generally not so happy, are the ones shopping daily.

IMO I think today's stuff are so junky that a pair of shoes that once lasted almost a full year doesn't last anymore. Same for clothing. Everything is cheap quality.

But it's also possible that there are so many items/ideas (seen on social media) easily acquired through Amazon etc. Shopping is easy, and everyone is upgrading with more modern and cool stuff. People just feel like going along with the trend.


Shopping can also be an addiction for some people. It’s usually to try to fill a void inside. But of course it will only feel good for a short while and then the emptiness and need are back. That need can never be filled with things.
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