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-> Fashion and Beauty
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amother
Mintgreen
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 Mon, Jun 17 2024, 5:18 pm
This thread made me laugh 
Trying to add color to the chassidishe garb in subtle and not so subtle ways.
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amother
NeonGreen
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 5:32 pm
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Does he wear glasses. Lots to customize their. Socks are fun to look at when you see a bunch of chassidim with different colored socks sticking out. I have also seen colored shoe bottoms,cufflinks. Men.are wearing tish bekeshe to shul these days. All black but some have bolder design and glittery.
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amother
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 5:34 pm
| amother Valerian wrote: | It feels like you’re borderline harassing him about something he’s not interested in. Why are you insisting on finding ways when it seems he’s totally not into it?
Curious what your background is that you’re even thinking these things might make sense.
Side note those that do wear ties with a shtreimel cuz of their minhag are not quite wearing one with a pop of color |
Ok. I'm not sure why this is called for. I'm asking a genuine question. No need to tell me I'm harassing my husband.
I can just as easily say no to the shtreimel. DH has been wearing a short suit and tie (NO hat or shtreimel) ever since we got married (years ago). I am from a yeshivish background and we got married under no pretenses of being chassidish in levush.
He only decided recently that he wants to wear a bekeshe and shtreimel and be more chassidish. Maybe you could be a little kinder.
A pop of color is fine I assure you.
This is the internet. You don't know me (although maybe now I outed myself because it's a pretty unique situation), it would be nice if you/people can be a little gentler.
Normally I'd ignore these kinds of comments but the fact that you got a few likes seemed like a nice opportunity to share a little bit of perspective so maybe you can be kinder on the next post.
You have no idea what's behind peoples post and it's so interesting to see the posts about Israel and the hostages and people desperate for these people to be freed....but can't seem to be kind to people in their day to day.
I know I came here and set myself up for this, I'm ok with that. I'm sharing perspective for the next persons post that maybe feels "off" to you. You really want to make a difference for the Jewish people? Feel free to do some mitzvos and practice a bit more compassion bein adam l'chaveiro. Idk. Maybe the zchusim will help elsewhere.
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amother
Tealblue
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 5:41 pm
| amother OP wrote: | He used to have shirts with colors on the collar but they either got ruined with time or he outgrew them. Totally forgot about those!!!
I think I will bring that up to him and see why he stopped getting them.
I imagine he's going to say because they're way more expensive....I can't imagine why else he would stop  |
Maybe he didn't enjoy wearing them? It soundsnlike you're trying to dress him like a doll and he's not comfortable.
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amother
Papaya
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 5:45 pm
| amother OP wrote: | He used to have shirts with colors on the collar but they either got ruined with time or he outgrew them. Totally forgot about those!!!
I think I will bring that up to him and see why he stopped getting them.
I imagine he's going to say because they're way more expensive....I can't imagine why else he would stop |
You can get shirts with colored buttons (almost like a tie  ) and collar
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amother
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 5:55 pm
Just want to say I appreciate all the women on here that are giving helpful suggestions (and even gentle feedback!).
I do see you and your comments and appreciate them and you for answering my question!
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amother
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:04 pm
[quote="amother OP"]Right. That's what I've been told. I like the pop of color that a tie brings but my husband insists he will look like Purim and will lose respect if he tries to combine it. Deep within I know he is right but I'm hoping someone out there will say it's fine lolol
How else can we bring color into the chassidish levush?[/quote]
How about a red feather in his Shtreimel?
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amother
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:10 pm
[quote="amother Honeydew"] | amother OP wrote: | Right. That's what I've been told. I like the pop of color that a tie brings but my husband insists he will look like Purim and will lose respect if he tries to combine it. Deep within I know he is right but I'm hoping someone out there will say it's fine lolol
How else can we bring color into the chassidish levush?[/quote]
How about a red feather in his Shtreimel? |
He did mention a feather but I've never seen that. To me that sounds like Purim. Is it not and totally an acceptable thing? What kind of feather is this? Do you buy it in a shtreimel/hat store? I imagine it's not a craft feather I can find in the playgroup...
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amother
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:11 pm
| NechaMom wrote: | https://www.boropark24.com/news/beyond-the-regular-how-hatty-purim-uses-color-and-talent-to-transform-purim-headgear
How about this? |
Nooooo. Definitely not what either of us are looking for at all. But appreciate the laugh!
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amother
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:16 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | He did mention a feather but I've never seen that. To me that sounds like Purim. Is it not and totally an acceptable thing? What kind of feather is this? Do you buy it in a shtreimel/hat store? I imagine it's not a craft feather I can find in the playgroup... |
I was kind of kidding, but they do look really cool on black fedoras, I see some young (semi) yeshivish guys wearing them, but I've never seen one in a shtreimel
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amother
Cyclamen
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:16 pm
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My husband wears that, in his 20s -Stolin.
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amother
Bottlebrush
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:17 pm
That levush really doesn’t go together.
The select few who do wear it, get lots of comments and have a good explanation
Your husband will get lots of questions, and what will his response be?
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NechaMom
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:22 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | Nooooo. Definitely not what either of us are looking for at all. But appreciate the laugh! |
You do seem like a very caring supportive wife. Wishing you lots of luck and color in your life! 🩷❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜🖤🩶🤍🤎
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amother
Starflower
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:24 pm
Yup, my family Boyaner chasidim
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amother
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:28 pm
| amother Bottlebrush wrote: | That levush really doesn’t go together.
The select few who do wear it, get lots of comments and have a good explanation
Your husband will get lots of questions, and what will his response be? |
Shalom Bayis? It was the requirement to put on a shtreimel that the tie stays in some version even if only every other week?
I think everyone can get the "Shalom Bayis when you're married to a litvak, you know how it is when the wife says something..." comment in a sense.
It's not like it's a deal breaker to me and it's not a deal breaker to him to not wear it. More just sharing that I imagine that kind of comment is used quite often when people don't want to launch into a whole thing and it's acceptable enough. Maybe they'll chuckle, my DH will chuckle along, and maybe they'll share a comment of something they did for shalom bayis and they'll bond for a few moments in humor and move along.
But didn't experience it in reality so don't know how it would actually turn out hence why I'm asking questions first
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tweek
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:36 pm
Op I just want to give you a little encouragement here. You sound like a great wife! There is nothing I admire more than someone who tries to help themselves. I admire it much more than someone who stubbornly sticks up for themselves without taking the other person into account or someone who quietly gives in and is resentfully a martyr.
Kudos to you!
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amother
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Mon, Jun 17 2024, 6:38 pm
| amother OP wrote: | Ok. I'm not sure why this is called for. I'm asking a genuine question. No need to tell me I'm harassing my husband.
I can just as easily say no to the shtreimel. DH has been wearing a short suit and tie (NO hat or shtreimel) ever since we got married (years ago). I am from a yeshivish background and we got married under no pretenses of being chassidish in levush.
He only decided recently that he wants to wear a bekeshe and shtreimel and be more chassidish. Maybe you could be a little kinder.
A pop of color is fine I assure you.
This is the internet. You don't know me (although maybe now I outed myself because it's a pretty unique situation), it would be nice if you/people can be a little gentler.
Normally I'd ignore these kinds of comments but the fact that you got a few likes seemed like a nice opportunity to share a little bit of perspective so maybe you can be kinder on the next post.
You have no idea what's behind peoples post and it's so interesting to see the posts about Israel and the hostages and people desperate for these people to be freed....but can't seem to be kind to people in their day to day.
I know I came here and set myself up for this, I'm ok with that. I'm sharing perspective for the next persons post that maybe feels "off" to you. You really want to make a difference for the Jewish people? Feel free to do some mitzvos and practice a bit more compassion bein adam l'chaveiro. Idk. Maybe the zchusim will help elsewhere. |
This is a different ballgame. Your dh is changing and while you respect his wishes, you want to be heard and understood.
So- as some mentioned- the shtreimel bekitche/ tie look exists but slowly disappearing. My father’s generation (mid 70’s & dh and freinds-mid 50’s early sixties). Israelis and European)wore this. As children grew up many removed the tie look.
My boys wear short suits, uphats, and ties and gartel on shabbos.
My bil and nephews wear bekitche, tie and bend down on shabbos.
Perhaps your husband cab transition slowly. Bekitche and tie first and then later switch to shtreimel and decide about the tie. That way you have time to acclimate and get used to it.
My dh is a actually the last of his friends who wears a short single breasted suit with bend down hat during the week, and shtreimel beketche on shabbos. His friends switched to uphats and double breasted or lange rekyl.
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