5 year olds outside alone together

↑ Cheiny ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 6:57 pm

giftedmom wrote:

You know cars can snatch anyone, five, ten, or 15 years old. Even if the mother is standing two feet away. We can’t live our entire lives in fear of what if.

So the same Moms who feel their five-year olds are responsible enough to be left outside on their own, should also feel free to leave them home alone while Mom goes out, no? If not, why not? Isn’t your home safer than the street?

But guess what. If anything should happen to the child while the Mom was out and the authorities found out, the Mom would be arrested because it’s illegal to leave a child of that age alone. There’s a reason for that.

↑ Cheiny ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 6:58 pm

giftedmom wrote:

How so? In terms of a car coming by and snatching them?

Are you really asking how a child of 5 is different than a child of 14? Seriously?

↑ Cheiny ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:00 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

Nope, not at all. My 16 year old goes on the bus to jerusalem, walks to friends..
Im not going to continue this. I see a young 5 year old differently than a 15 year old, out by themselves. Im sorry you dont.

I’m with you… shaking my head and wondering where the common sense is…

↑ Cheiny ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:01 pm

amother Quince wrote:

I let my 2&5 year old play outside alone all the time as long as the window or door is open. They both know the rules and scream loudly.

G-d help and watch over them…

↑ Cheiny ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:03 pm

amother Quince wrote:

I don't leave either out alone, theyre always together and it's an almost 3 year old. She's proven herself trustworthy bH and I'm always in earshot. Interestingly the non Jewish families on the block give their kids even more freedom that I do.

Ohhhhh! It’s an almost 3 yr old! And she’s proven herself trustworthy, the almost 3 yr old has! Well then that makes all the difference in the world to you? Would you also leave her alone at home?
Can't Believe It

↑ Cheiny ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:07 pm

amother Clover wrote:

So much fear on this thread.

You call it fear, responsible parents call it properly watching and protecting our kids.

amother

Fern

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:11 pm

I feel like many people in more suburban neighborhoods are under the impression that they are safe. Nowhere is safe. I am not so much worried about her walking into the street. More worried about any creep that is smart enough to go into a suburban neighborhood because people there are more unassuming and it only takes a second. I used to watch these documentaries and there was a girl who was kidnapped just feet away from her stepfather in a suburban neighborhood, 9 year old girl who was snatched. She was found after 18 years. Not trying to instill crazy fear. I just come from a higher crime rate area so I have my guard up more than others but you clearly feel unsettled about it so just giving perspective.

amother

Sage

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:13 pm

giftedmom wrote:

So give me a better reason than “a car can come by and snatch them”

a helpless 5 year old is obv an easier target than a 15 year old. at least a 15 year old will do everything in their power to not get kidnapped, kick scream etc. a 5 year old can possibly just be easily persuaded to go in the car with the stranger

amother

Marigold

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:18 pm

I don’t know,
Where I live I see too much helicopter parenting. (I’m guilty of being one). Looking back, my friends and o were raised with more independence, albeit the risks, I think there are a ton of benefits to that.

To the amother that wrote that at a certain age you will stop worrying and know if the right time, I disagree. Personally I still imagine worst case scenarios even when my 11 year old is outside, and yes even my husband. The world is a scary place, but we need to exert a balance on keeping our kids perfectly safe, while also giving them health independence.

That said, my frum area is loaded with little kids of all ages all summer long.
There are also survillience cameras all over. I know people who put a tracker in their kids trousers.

amother

Buttercup

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:21 pm

I don't worry about kidnapping as much as a child going into the street. I see little children running after balls, walking into the street because they don't know better, biking in the street as if they own the road...

Last week I saw a little boy, probably around 4, in the street no adult in sight. I told him he shouldn't be in the street and he put his hands over his ears and stuck out his tongue. If anything would've happened to him I'm sure his parents would be devastated, but they were no where in sight!
A different time there was a crawling baby in the street, 3 year old boy by the curb screaming "come back! come back!" It's a huge nes there were no cars coming. I got the baby and looked around, there was no adult in sight! Finally the mother came and she wasn't frantic at all, didn't even say thank you when I said I got her baby from the street.

amother

Cerise

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:21 pm

amother Mintgreen wrote:

Just curious if all of you who are answering no live in the suburbs? My five year old would not run into the street. And if god forbid his friend would, there’s rarely traffic here and the speed limit is 20mph so it’s not a concern…. When people come from other busier areas they’re always amazed at the difference…

My student was hit while waiting to cross a quiet street in lakewood.
Five year olds do not belong outside alone. Even a cul-de-sac can be dangerous.

↑ giftedmom ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:42 pm

Cheiny wrote:

1. If I leave him home alone then I’m not accessible to him vs when he’s outside he can come in when he needs something.
2. When he’s outside he’s always around many other people, including adults that would help him if he’s in trouble.

↑ Cheiny ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:45 pm

amother Buttercup wrote:

Shomer p’sayim Hashem…

amother

↑ Quince ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:47 pm

I think we're all envisioning our own kids and our own neighborhoods in this conversation. Not all kids play with balls. Not all streets have a lot of cars. Not all streets is "being alone" actually mean there's no other adults out there.

↑ Cheiny ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:48 pm

giftedmom wrote:

1. So if a stranger tried to grab him, c”v, he “can come in when he needs something?” And what about if a ball rolls in the street?

2. Newsflash: if a Mom is busy watching her own child/children, her priority will not be and won’t be able to be keeping a close eye on yours at the same time….

Last edited by Cheiny on Sun, Jun 02 2024, 10:18 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

↑ Jade ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:50 pm

Just saying I do not appreciate the people who don’t come out and think I’m just going to assist their kids too. My hands are full and you just make my life hard. And half the adults will be too annoyed to look out for your kid or help them. That’s just rude on your part.

↑ Cheiny ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:51 pm

amother Quince wrote:

None of that is relevant. No parent should allow their very young children to be outside alone, even if there’s one other parent out there watching hers (and supposedly others)… she only has 2 eyes, and your kids won’t be her priority. Your children are your responsibility. Not someone else’s.

↑ giftedmom ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:51 pm

amother Jade wrote:

I’m talking about an emergency. Anything else they just come inside and ask me. I’ve helped plenty little kids while sitting outside and wasn’t annoyed. Maybe we just have bigger hearts over here.

amother

↑ Jade ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 7:53 pm

giftedmom wrote:

How big is your heart if you can’t sit outside with your kids…