5 year olds outside alone together

amother

OP ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:22 pm

I let my 5 year old play with our next door neighbor in front of our 2 houses. (Not beyond our two houses.).
I trust my 5 year old not to go further.
We live on a suburban street.
I felt pretty comfortable with this.

But, on friday night I started having second thoughts. And being afraid because anyone in the world could drive down our block and - stranger danger.

Not sure what to do.

Thoughts?

amother

Mintgreen ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:28 pm

In my suburban neighborhood I would allow my five year old outside with a friend as long as my windows were open (so I could hear someone crying etc) and would check on them every few minutes…

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:34 pm

amother Mintgreen wrote:

In my suburban neighborhood I would allow my five year old outside with a friend as long as my windows were open (so I could hear someone crying etc) and would check on them every few minutes…

Even with your windows open, what if your kid goes into the street or a car comes past and snatches a kid because davka there are NO adults out there?

amother

↑ Mintgreen ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:34 pm

LovesHashem wrote:

No! What if their toy or ball falls into the street? You really think a five year old won't think I'll just get it really quickly?
?

Just curious if all of you who are answering no live in the suburbs? My five year old would not run into the street. And if god forbid his friend would, there’s rarely traffic here and the speed limit is 20mph so it’s not a concern…. When people come from other busier areas they’re always amazed at the difference…

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:37 pm

amother Mintgreen wrote:

I live in a yishuv and I still would not let 2 five year olds play with no supervision. You nrver know what could happen.

giftedmom ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:39 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

Even with your windows open, what if your kid goes into the street or a car comes past and snatches a kid because davka there are NO adults out there?

You know cars can snatch anyone, five, ten, or 15 years old. Even if the mother is standing two feet away. We can’t live our entire lives in fear of what if.

amother

Butterscotch ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:41 pm

It depends on so many things.
In my area there are lots of 5 yos playing outside unsupervised. Jewish and nonjewish.
My son rides his bike down the road not to far (he knows the limit) with a whole bunch of other 4, 5, 6 and 7 year olds.

It's a quiet suburban neighborhood. One house per 1/2 acres and houses mostly close to the road with large backyards. The road is straight here and now winding and little trees out front. So that means there is great visibility pretty far down both ways.
There is also always someone out supervising their younger children. (And oftentimes it's me too) and we all look out for each other.

Ironically, when I lived in a large condo development I didn't let my kid out of my sight. There were too many basements and random placed for a kid to disappear to.
My cousin watched her son being squished by a delivery truck delivering her son's goody bag for his upshern. She was just a couple yards away but wasn't close enough to grav him r"l. Things could happen anywhere. Hashem should keep his right hand on all his children.

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:41 pm

giftedmom wrote:

You know cars can snatch anyone, five, ten, or 15 years old. Even if the mother is standing two feet away. We can’t live our entire lives in fear of what if.

I d9nt live in fear of what if. But a 5 year old is VERY different than a 10 or 15 year old.

↑ giftedmom ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:42 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

I d9nt live in fear of what if. But a 5 year old is VERY different than a 10 or 15 year old.

How so? In terms of a car coming by and snatching them?

amother

↑ Mintgreen

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:43 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

Even with your windows open, what if your kid goes into the street or a car comes past and snatches a kid because davka there are NO adults out there?

I have a huge front lawn and the kids play close to the house and my property is fenced in… you can barely see the kids from the street… you all do you, I’m not op but as a mostly safe responsible parent replying to OP my answer would be yes I’d let…

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:44 pm

giftedmom wrote:

How so? In terms of a car coming by and snatching them?

Are you really asking this?
How is a 5 year old the same as a 15 year old?
But ok, to your logic, no kids should play outside, ok then.

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:45 pm

amother Mintgreen wrote:

Fenced in is a completely different thing.

↑ giftedmom ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:45 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

Are you really asking this?
How is a 5 year old the same as a 15 year old?
But ok, to your logic, no kids should play outside, ok then.

Actually according to your logic no one should be venturing outside because anything can happen

↑ shabbatiscoming

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:47 pm

giftedmom wrote:

Actually according to your logic no one should be venturing outside because anything can happen

Nope, not at all. My 16 year old goes on the bus to jerusalem, walks to friends..
Im not going to continue this. I see a young 5 year old differently than a 15 year old, out by themselves. Im sorry you dont.

↑ giftedmom ↓

Sun, Jun 02 2024, 12:49 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

So give me a better reason than “a car can come by and snatch them”