S/o stuff you misunderstood as a little kid

amother

↑ Cherry ↓

Wed, May 15 2024, 8:35 am

My toddler boys are convinced my baby girl will turn into a boy when she turns 3 and has upsherin
One of them told me "dont worry mommy you will get upsherin soon, Totty will cut your hair, and you will also be a boy and get koppel and tzitzis just like me"

amother

↑ Cherry

Wed, May 15 2024, 8:38 am

I thought my morah had real eyes in the back of her head. She said she knows what were doing even if she turns around

amother

↑ RosePink ↓

Wed, May 15 2024, 8:40 am

peace2 wrote:

Here’s an embarrassing one: I used to imagine Hashem looked like the face on the cover of the taboo box- like it was His face and He looked down at us from the sky like that

I used to imagine him half girl half boy.

Pony on one side with half a girl shirt and skirt.
And boy shirt and pants on the other side with a yarmulka.

I also used to imagine him the way the alter rebbe looked in the drawing of him with all the words from Tanya.

momlife

Wed, May 15 2024, 8:42 am

amother Cherry wrote:

Theres actually a movie where everyone lived in a bubble and in a real life movie for the rest of the world out of the bubble. There were eyes all over videoing everything and everyone had little pieces in their ears following instructions. One baby born was never told hes in a movie so he grew up in a fake world with a pre arranged marriage and he never knew until he was much older and he went to the end of the world and touched the bubble.

The Truman Show

amother

↑ RosePink ↓

Wed, May 15 2024, 8:43 am

When my mother told me about periods I asked her if non jews get them too.

amother

Aconite

Wed, May 15 2024, 8:50 am

sushilover wrote:

I could not figure out how drug stores got away with advertising their illegal activities. Like why wouldn't they try to hide the fact that they sell drugs?

Haha and I was freaked out by the (auto) body shop that we used to pass on the way to school!

theoneandonly

Wed, May 15 2024, 9:02 am

peace2 wrote:

Here’s an embarrassing one: I used to imagine Hashem looked like the face on the cover of the taboo box- like it was His face and He looked down at us from the sky like that

I had such a vivid image in my head of what Hashem looked like: He had a green cloak and matching green pointy hat, and red curly hair. Where that came from I have no idea What

geuzunt

Wed, May 15 2024, 9:12 am

I heard my Dad talk about getting fired and I was terrified! Had nightmares for weeks.

↑ SuperWify ↓

Wed, May 15 2024, 9:38 am

geuzunt wrote:

I heard my Dad talk about getting fired and I was terrified! Had nightmares for weeks.

Haha yes. When I heard my parents “fired” our housekeeper for stealing from us I thought that a bit harsh. I was picturing a big bonfire type of thing and I wondered when and where and exactly how that happened.

baked ziti

Wed, May 15 2024, 9:46 am

When I was really young, I thought that the steam coming up from the manholes in Manhattan was J2 frying their French fries in an underground kitchen.
I also used to think that a stomach ache was due to a cake growing in my stomach (stomach-cake).
When I was a bit older(preteen) I worried that if I was in a quiet public place, like a city bus, others can hear my thoughts. They just pretended not to out of kindness.

amother

Winterberry

Wed, May 15 2024, 10:21 am

I thought babies come out of the belly button until my kallah teacher told me otherwise.

I thought Hashem made the greatest miracle and made that married women should get pregnant when they got married. I didn't know about relations or that unmarried people could be pregnant.

amother

↑ RosePink ↓

Wed, May 15 2024, 10:21 am

amother Winterberry wrote:

I was about to say the same thing!

amother

DarkYellow

Wed, May 15 2024, 10:23 am

I thought only non Jews had s*x
I was quite shocked finding out that that’s how you make babies Banging head

amother

Mintcream

Wed, May 15 2024, 10:27 am

SuperWify wrote:

I used to think there was no color in the olden days because all the pictures were black and white and that color was only invented when my grandparents were little. Lucky them!

I also thought people “in the olden days” were all depressed and miserable that they lived in such old times because they never smiled in the pictures.

My 7 yr old just asked me if the world was colored when I was a kid in the olden days lol! I’m 39 btw

↑ imthatawesome ↓

Wed, May 15 2024, 10:39 am

Peersupport wrote:

I thought Goldy Lox was Jewish.

my father didn’t grow up with these stories and never listened when my mother read them to us. Once, when my father was taking care of us himself, we asked him to tell us the Goldilocks story. He proceeded to tell us a story about a girl called Goldy who got into a fight with some bears over the last piece of lox

It was still a great story LOL

bigsis144

Wed, May 15 2024, 11:05 am

Some adults at the Shabbos table were discussing the quality and designs of various expensive brands of furniture.

I thought I was so worldly when I piped up “like IKEA!”

I had once seen a catalog and thought they were foreign and Swedish and minimalist-chic, they MUST be fancy designer furniture 😂

amother

↑ Linen ↓

Wed, May 15 2024, 11:13 am

You know those tags attached to furniture and mattresses that said “do not detach under penalty of law”? My mother told me that when she was a kid she thought that if you cut or ripped one off the police would come and arrest you!

amother

Holly

Wed, May 15 2024, 11:29 am

We lived down the road from a big brick church building
I thought Mashiach lived in that building. Every time we walked past I would try to look inside to see him.

↑ #BestBubby ↓

Wed, May 15 2024, 12:30 pm

When Morah told the story about how the brothers threw Yosef in a pit,

I didn't understand how Yosef could fit into a tiny pit. It must have been a nes.