Color schemes | Imamother

amother

OP ↓

Tue, May 07 2024, 10:35 pm

My husbands nephew is engaged. My sil would like as all to wear gowns which has been the trend with the last few weddings on DH side. There are only a few married nieces and nephews so far ..
I come from a very different background where aunts and cousins were dressy dresses. No gowns, no rentals, no professional hair and makeup.
I was happy to go along with the color as long as it worked for me. (The hair and makeup I’m def not doing but that no one will give me a hard time about)
The kallah sent out a “mood board” of the colors she wants everyone in, maybe I’m cruel but it made me roll my eyes.. I was able to find something cheap that works for my kids in the color the kallah wants. For myself however and my limited out of town options I was trying to just be open minded. I found something on asos on sale for $45 but it’s not wrong color. She wants pale light tones and this is the right color but dark. WWYD?

amother

Red

Wed, May 08 2024, 12:00 am

You mentioned limited OOT options but you are planning on ordering online anyways- are you able to find a dress in the right shade? Being in a dark gown with everyone in pastels will stick out like a sore thumb. If you aren’t being in pictures, I wouldn’t worry about it too much and go with the darker dress. If you are being in pictures I’d try to get the right shade so it all matches.

If you post the color and your budget, maybe we can help you find something

ETA I see it’s your nephew who’s getting married- why are you going according to kallahs colors? Usually each side picks their own color scheme, unless the boys side specifically chose the same colors to coordinate?

amother

Blueberry

Wed, May 08 2024, 12:16 am

I don’t follow the color scheme when it’s my nieces and nephews. It’s insane to expect people to keep buying gowns of different colors that they will wear once.

amother

Garnet

Wed, May 08 2024, 12:20 am

My mother bought herself a nice black gown and wears it to all nieces and nephews weddings. I don't think the extended family needs to buy new gowns for each wedding. That adds up very quickly when weddings are frequent

amother

↑ OP

Wed, May 08 2024, 11:09 am

Yes it’s my nephew. The kallah requested everyone be in the same color. I obviously don’t want to intentionally upset a kallah but I feel she’s very young and naive in her request to have extended family all the in the same color .. I think I’m just gonna go with my gut and order this. I will likely not be in photos, maybe one large family pic with everyone in it but I don’t think I’ll stick out in that with all the men in black and all the busyness in a pic where I’ll be 90% blocked anyway ..

zaq

Wed, May 08 2024, 11:13 am

Color schemes are for the wedding party, I.e. immediate family of the chosson and kallah and bridesmaids, if any. Aunts, uncles, cousins? Nope. Get together with the other aunts and cousins and agree that you will all wear whatever you like. Unless the baalei haimcha are paying for your garments, they have no right to dictate what you wear.

amother

Jade

Wed, May 08 2024, 11:21 am

Color scheme is for siblings, mothers and grandmother's.
I don't think cousins and aunts need to match color scheme!!
How many pictures will you be on anyway?
The whole point of color scheme is to get nice pictures! LOL

At the wedding itself anyone wearing a gown is a relative. That's enough of a distinction!