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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Pesach
Do you enjoy the Seder?
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LovesHashem




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:15 am
No. Hate Matzah, hate that's it's long loud and boring. I spend half of it usually reading so much its not so bad, but I dread Matzah
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readreread




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:36 am
I love the seder but I also make pesach at home so I do an abbreviated version. Helps that I have an 18 month old and I myself have ADHD, so attention spans are loooow. I also love the Hillel sandwich (don't ask me why, I don't know either) and it's the one time a year I get to eat like five of them without people looking at me like I'm a weirdo. Plus just in general there are dinner foods at Pesach that I love that I never eat other times of year, like potato kugel and gefilte fish and chopped liver.

It's my favorite holiday, can you tell?
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amother
Darkblue  


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:56 am
I love the seder! And yes, korech sandwich is the best!
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amother
  Darkblue


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:57 am
amother Mayflower wrote:
Genuinely love it, but only because we make it ALL about the kids! We speed read through Maggid, then spend easily over an hour acting out all the plagues- EVERYONE is involved- I’m usually Pharoah😂

Love this!
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amother
Linen


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:58 am
No, not at all. I hate every second of it. I tell my husband that this is the one night of the year I wish I wasnt frum and wouldnt have to do this. I hate it that much.
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kermit  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 11:13 am
I undertand. I used to hate it too. But now I LOVE it.

As I grew up, life was hard and it was hard for me to live 'in the moment' ever. to just BE and enjoy.

Growing up in chaos and a miserable childhood. Waiting 4 years for my child. Losing my first husband to a long and difficult illness very young. Struggling financially etc...my life has been a journey.

To survive, I learned to escape and live in my head. read books, distract, relax, escape, eat my feelings, go somewhere else in my brain. it's a trauma response that many people have, even those who go through low level but chronic stress.

But I have been actively working on taking a deep breath when my mind and patience want to leave and and just BEING there, wherever I am.

BEING has been absolutely TRANSFORMATIVE.

The last couple years, I sit by the table, and try to just BE. In the moment, with my husband and my child and just ENJOY ENJOY ENJOY.

Being grateful for what I have -- even though so much is missing, even though parts of life are still so so incredibly painful for me.

To tune in and listen and playfully banter and sing. hwo LUCKY I am for my husband and my child and to have a home and a table with food.

Real life doesn't have to be boring. if you're life is chaotic or you're feeling uncomfortable being in the present for any other reason, being at the seder can be tortous.

but this is what we're living for, no?

When I'm old and wrinkled, I'll be so grateful I pushed myself to enjoy these moments for what they were. and hug all these memories I'm building.
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amother
Violet


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 12:12 pm
I like it, but I find Maggid to be convoluted and I dislike drinking so much wine/grape juice.
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amother
Powderblue


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 12:22 pm
Not really. It's better when I'm a guest and not worrying about serving the meal and cleaning up after it, but I, too, find it overlong, and I come into it exhausted from the Pesach preps. But probably not as exhausted as our ancestors were during the original Exodus. .

But is the point of the seder to enjoy it? I think not. I think the point is a. vehigadeta levincha and b. to be marbeh lesaper beytziyat mitzrayim. If you enjoy the process, more power to you, but enjoyment is not an obligation.
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Machel




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 12:27 pm
My husbands take which I agree with is that the seder(s) would be so much more enjoyable if they were at the end of pesach, when you have had time to recover from the stress of cleaning and can spend the chag learning and preparing. But alas, that's not how Hashem wants it.
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amother
Teal


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 1:13 pm
I love the seder! It's one of my favorite nights of the year. It feels so magical and majestic. We go through the hagaddah together and somehow we end up with a bunch of questions and we argue them out, trying to find answers. There are amazing moments to daven and so many moments of incredible amazement of Hashem. It gives me a feeling of such joy to be a Jew!
I very much second what Kermit wrote. Learning to be present, living the moment I'm in, has been literally life changing. I used to hate the seder. It was too long, too boring, too much grape juice, too much having to listen to divrei Torah my tired brain couldn't understand or didn't care for. Now that I have learned to live in the moment (well, I'm not perfect at it, but a lot better than I used to be) Pesach brings so much pure joy.
I hope all of you who have such a tough time with Pesach will somehow find this year's seder very different than the past ones, and very uplifting and pleasant!
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amother
Antiquewhite


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 1:25 pm
I know I’ll get flak for this- but yes I do!
I love the Seder! Always have always will.
It’s so special and meaningful to me, I connect with the words of the hagada, and I feel the mesorah very deeply on that night. I feel really really special by the Seder and beyond grateful to Hashem for making me a yid
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amother
Clover


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 1:36 pm
I love the Seder when we do it at home. We all squeeze onto the couch (yes even me) we sing songs, give the kids attention, laugh and giggle and say the serious parts while the kids are entertaining themselves with books. We finish really fast and sometimes we are still early enough to take a walk outside before going to bed. It’s nice to hear all the singing coming from windows.

I also like the Seder at our parents, although it’s a little harder to keep the kids from becoming overtired. We socialize with family, the kids get lots of attention. It’s nice, but yes tiring.
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 2:21 pm
I don’t love it but I try to be in the moment and appreciate it each year. I am not a night person so staying up late is hard for me and I hate feeling tired. I wish it started earlier
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amother
Green  


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 2:22 pm
Love it b"h. We are all excited for it.
I'm doing seder as no dh around and dc are getting older so has different flavour. More depth etc and we all enjoy it.

1st time having a son in law around, so no singing for me and dds 😔. Boys will have to manage 😉

Any other mums leading the seder?
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amother
Midnight


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 2:40 pm
ugh this post is making me get antsy for seder.

kids crying my fil shlepping away like crazy... then we still have a long walk home
whatever I should really just enjoy it right?
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amother
Opal


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 3:18 pm
[
To survive, I learned to escape and live in my head. read books, distract, relax, escape, eat my feelings, go somewhere else in my brain. it's a trauma response that many people have, even those who go through low level but chronic stress.

But I have been actively working on taking a deep breath when my mind and patience want to leave and and just BEING there, wherever I am.

BEING has been absolutely TRANSFORMATIVE.)

Please tell me how you worked on being present. I'm always looking for an escape and find it so hard to be present.
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amother
Lemonlime


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 4:50 pm
amother OP wrote:
I find the seders really hard. I'm tired and exhausted and I don't want to sit on a chair for 5 hours. I can read a novel or shmooze but sitting at a table and just listening and reading the hagada and listening some more, to all the kids and dh divrei torah is challenging for me.
I feel guilty about this but it doesn't change anything.
am I the only one?


I dont
I hate staying up late
I get bored
I get tired
havent stayed up for a full seder since having kids. bc said kids wake up at 7 am no matter what.
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amother
Tangerine


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 4:59 pm
I wish I can but it's too drawn out by my in laws and they finish 3 am. I don't always end up eating matza ,maror, and having all 4 cups because I'm such a mess from not sleeping the night before due to travelling. When we had the sedorim at home during covid, we finished before 12:30 and I was able to have everything.
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amother
Pansy


 

Post Fri, Apr 12 2024, 1:52 am
No, I do not. Not at all.
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amother
Snowdrop


 

Post Fri, Apr 12 2024, 2:22 am
I love love love it!

First, we have a short seder. We end around 11:30- 12:30. I'm usually in bed by 9, so this is still a stretch for me, but I try to nap the day before and that helps a lot.

I love watching my husband run the seder. Every year he creates an interactive show with props and prizes. I keep waiting for our kids to grow out of it, but my two oldest are teenagers and still look forward to it every year. It's goofy and silly, but we have so much fun with it.

I love hearing my kids (sometimes rambling and incomprehensible) divre Torah. They're so passionate, and so proud of themselves.

I love the question and answer format of the seder. I love that after many years of lovely chaos at a Shabbos or yomtov table (I had my children very close in age), we now have such interesting and intelligent conversations. My children are so interesting! They're minds are full of fresh and original thoughts and insights!

I love matzo.

I don't normally drink anything alcoholic, but I do drink wine at the seder. My husband likes to pick out different wines for me to try for each of the four cups, which is really fun. I tend to end the seder night a drop tipsy.
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