This came from my 9 year old..

miriamnechama ↓

Sat, Aug 09 2008, 9:09 pm

I was pretty surprised.

I was sitting talkingto my future sil, (my brother's kalla) who spent shabbos with us.

we were looking at my wedding albums, and my 9 year old ds pipes up and says...

"so you how long were you alone ie just me and dh before I was born".. I said um a little over 2 years.. I think he said 3 years.

he said oh so it was such fun for you before I came.... shock

yeah really I almost started IF.... though I never told him that.

then he siad to me... "so from the chasuna it takes 6 months till the baby is born shock

me and my sil were in fits of laughter, and he couldn't understand what was so funny... LOL

and this is coming from a 9 yera old who is learing chumash in depth and mishna and claims he knows more than me!!!

Mitzvahmom ↓

Sat, Aug 09 2008, 9:33 pm

The night of my chasuna (3 weeks ago second marriage for both of us)

My 9 year old pulled me aside, with big blue puppy dog eyes...and tears ready to pour out..

I said sweetie what's the problem??
He said, "now you have to go to the hospital."
I was a bit shocked and said "why?"
He said, "because now your going to have a baby!!"
I said, "um sweetie that might not happen right away calm down.."
He calmed down abit and said, "well how long do I have? a month? a year? I need a timeline here mommy"
I laughed and hugged him and said do not worry about such things.. Just come and dance with me.

B"H he calmed down and seems ok..

↑ Mitzvahmom

Sat, Aug 09 2008, 9:45 pm

miriamnechama wrote:

that's so sweet...

btw since when do children go to a parents wedding??

they are allowed at the reception and for pictures..

They were not there for the chuppah, this is what the Rav told us was acceptable.. If I told you would else came it would throw this discussion WAY off topic!! LOL

freidasima

Sun, Aug 10 2008, 6:09 am

Just FYI children are allowed at a parent's wedding al pi din. The reason that a custom started not to do it was that most weddings were because a parent had lost a husband or a wife. As it was customary to marry after two regalim, meaning within the first year, sometimes even only after six months, particularly for a man not to be alone, then if there were children from the first marriage, the widow was no longer in ovel, she only keeps 30 days, but her children would be in aveilus all year. Hence they couldn't go to the festivities.

That's the only halachic reason that children could not go to a parent's wedding. Lots of groups try to say that it is kabbalistic, but halachawise, there is no reason why not if it is as a result of a divorce, and even if the result of widowhood et. when no longer in the period of the year.

There have been many weddings of people in their 80s after long years of being a widow or widower or divorced, where their own children held the chuppa for them, or were given sheva brochos. I have been to several chasuneh's like that, where the "children" are in their sixties! It was very moving...