My Tefila Was Answered

amother

Aqua

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 11:17 am

amother Cyclamen wrote:

Now I"m hyperventilating! someone please calm me down...My daughter spilled her heart out on a message zos chanuka and placed it under the menorah...one of her bakoshes was that I should merit a baby (I happened to have had a second trimester loss that I found out about zos chanuka the year before, though I dont think she knew about my loss...but was itching for another sibling) I dont know what I did with that paper (I never heard about the specifics surrounding this segulah, such as placing with the Menorah for the entire year...) Well I was due December 22 this year (on Chanuka) but unfortunately lost the pregnancy at 21 weeks...Did I inadvertently cause this by not saving the paper? Crying

amother

↑ DarkGreen ↓

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 1:28 pm

amother Cyclamen wrote:

Please Cyclamen, don't even think of going there.
These segulah stories are terrible.
There are some segulahs that have a real source but these aren't magical spells. We're not living in Harry Potter or in a fairy tale. The way some people look at these things can literally be avoda zara.
It's nice people have good news to share and we're very happy they got their yeshua but I know someone personally who did this and nothing happened. I'm sure she's not the only one. The people who did it and didn't get their wish aren't here that's all.
Don't cry Cyclamen and stop hyperventilating. I'm so sorry for your loss but you have to know there was nothing you did that caused it. Sit in front of the candles this year and daven and may all your tefillos be answered in the best possible way.

amother

RosePink

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 1:36 pm

amother DarkGreen wrote:

Exactly this. I was inspired last year by this thread to ask Hashem for a baby. I got pregnant and thought hey this works! I lost it in February. We've been trying every month since. I'm pregnant again but so far no heartbeat is seen. It might just be too early or maybe this pregnancy isn't meant to be. I definitely won't be putting any weight into this zos chanuka mishegas.

farmom ↓

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 1:39 pm

amother Blush wrote:

Chanukah is only time we're allowed to ask for miracles!! Time of miracles!!....

Just wanted to note, and not to knock the segula, while Chanukah is a time of miracles, of course we may ask for miracles at any time. Hashem can do anything, anytime.

amother

↑ Seablue

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 1:47 pm

amother RosePink wrote:

I’m sorry for your loss. However the inyan of the power of Zos Chanukah is no “mishegas” and any one specific person’s “results” from their tefillos or “lack thereof” are no indication of the strength of the power. The AriZal and many other sources teach us about its special koach. Just one among them is the well known teaching from Rabbi Yisrael of Rozhin who said that what the greatest tzaddikim cannot do in their prayers at Neila at the end of Yom Kippur – even the simplest Jew can do on Zos Chanukah. Additionally there is a special koach for women who are waiting for children.
I don’t know the source for this specific segulah with the paper on the menorah, but the underlying power of tefillah on this special day is well-known and sourced.

amother

↑ DarkGreen ↓

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 1:59 pm

farmom wrote:

Just wanted to note, and not to knock the segula, while Chanukah is a time of miracles, of course we may ask for miracles at any time. Hashem can do anything, anytime.

There actually is a difference in the way we can ask. Hashem can do anything and we can ask for whatever our hearts desire, but as a general rule we don't ask for a miracle.
If we're asking for a baby we ask it should happen in a natural way, either the way babies are usually conceived or through medical intervention, but not as an actual neiss. If we're davening for a sick person we ask for a doctor, medical procedure or medicine to help, or if there's no known cure we ask Hashem to help a scientist in a lab make a new discovery. If we need a shidduch for someone we ask for the right person to find their way to the right match. Chanuka is a special time when we're allowed to ask for a miracle.
There isn't a huge practical difference. We're asking for what we need and we hope Hashem, who can do anything, sends us what we want. It's a little nuanced but it does tell us that Chanuka is an extra special time to daven.
The reason we're allowed to ask for open miracles on Chanuka unlike the rest of the days of the year is a question you can take to your lor.

amother

↑ Blush

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 2:08 pm

Yes exactly. Of course we always shld be davening all time time! But chanukah is a time we're ALLOWED and SHLD daven for miracles, things that we want or need and seem impossible or so out of reach , so difficult...chanukah davening by menorah can change that! Yes and there r other times of yr that r special powers, purim too..yes nillah Yom kippur..few times a yr of when there's that extra power, Of course hashem always hears our teffilos and just because it's not answered in way we want it, our tefillos NEVER go unanswered. That's why I said in my earlier post, I've davened for few yrs for child. Didn't happen till few yrs later, had a child and now pregnant bh with more then one:) Whether it had to do or not, no tefillos go to waste ever !!!

↑ farmom ↓

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 2:10 pm

amother DarkGreen wrote:

I've never heard this. Do you have a source I could look up?

amother

↑ Whitesmoke

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 2:43 pm

amother RosePink wrote:

I'm sorry for your losses.
Mishegas?! Please use a different word.

↑ PinkFridge ↓

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 2:50 pm

amother Whitesmoke wrote:

I'm sorry for your losses.
Mishegas?! Please use a different word.

Frenzy. Gesheft.
I think there's a middle ground. Use the time the candles are lit to do something profoundly spiritual. Tefilla might just be the greatest connection.
But don't obsess over getting it "right." It's not some complicated recipe that we have to get every detail right or the meringue will fall flat.
It's all bedei Shamayim. Only. Always was, is, and will be.

amother

↑ DarkGreen ↓

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 3:38 pm

farmom wrote:

I've never heard this. Do you have a source I could look up?

No, I'm sorry I don't. That's why I ended by suggesting you consult your lor for details.
I think the origin is in a gemara discussing davening for the gender of a child where it says not to daven for that after 40 days because by then the gender is decided. (I know that's not exactly how we understand the science behind it.)
The Shulchan Aruch discusses the halachos involved in asking for something that's out of the realm of teva. I don't know where you look it up. Somewhere in Orach Chaim because that's where tefilla is, but those are pretty big volumes to search on your own.
There are sefarim of responsa (sheylos utshuvos) of recent poskim where they were asked about davening for people who needed a refuah but doctors said it's over and nothing can be done. You'd need someone learned to look it up for you if you want exact sources.
The general rule is we don't daven for a neiss. Hashem makes our lives unfold according to the laws of teva He set into the world and we daven for him to make things happen for us within those parameters.
Chanuka is different. You can see that in the words of the harachaman you say if you forgot al hanissim in bentshing where you straight out ask Hashem to perform miracles for us. Different people ask why that's allowed and what it means. If you find someone to help you research it you'll find the answers interesting, but sorry, I'm not the one for the job.

↑ PinkFridge ↓

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 3:41 pm

amother DarkGreen wrote:

No, I'm sorry I don't. That's why I ended by suggesting you consult your lor for details.
Chanuka is different. You can see that in the words of the harachaman you say if you forgot al hanissim in bentshing where you straight out ask Hashem to perform miracles for us. Different people ask why that's allowed and what it means. If you find someone to help you research it you'll find the answers interesting, but sorry, I'm not the one for the job.

This was a beautiful post.
But again, we shouldn't feel that we "blew" it if we didn't say the right perakim of Tehillim at the right time, or didn't dot all the I's and cross all the t's on the kvitel we leave on the menorah.

amother

Impatiens ↓

Sun, Dec 11 2022, 3:56 pm

amother DarkGreen wrote:

so on chanukah I can ask for gender to be changed.?

I can ask for stone to turn to water? obviously I wont ask but can I? and hashem will make it happen?