A Potato Kugel Lady's thoughts on Mishloach Manos

amother

OP ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 11:04 am

Every year around this time there is a Great Debate: Homemade or Store Bought Mishloach Manos? There are ardent zealots on either side of this, each with their own arguments.

Far be it for me to enter into the fray. Truthfully, I respect both sides, and firmly believe each side should keep doing whatever they've been doing.

I'm just here to share my thoughts and my experience, and yes, I know no one asked me, so if this doesn't interest you, you can scoot right on by. I will never know the difference.

Also, apologies in advance for my long-windedness. As you may have already noticed, brevity is not my strong suit. So if you suffer from ADD or dislike long megillas masquerading as posts (no pun intended-really!), once again, feel free to skip right along.

OK, now that I got that disclaimer out of the way...

So, when I grew up, Mishloach manos only came in one form: The yeshiva's fundraiser baskets. Every year, a day or two before Purim, we would receive a delivery of about 15 -20 baskets which would go into a side room until Purim. They came in 3 sizes; large, medium and small. We always got like 2 really big ones, and then the rest were medium or small. On Purim, when someone came to bring us Mishloach manos, my mother would instruct me, in an undertone, to bring a medium or small basket, depending on the size basket the other person brought. (Not that I couldn't figure it out myself.) We saved the biggest ones for the Rav of the shul and my grandparents.

The contents never varied from year to year. They always consisted of a bottle of wine or grape juice, a shiny red apple, assorted nuts, Torino chocolate, hamantashen and wafer rolls- always wafer rolls. Shalach manos without wafer rolls could not be considered authentic shalach manos.

They were wrapped in cellophane paper and tied with ribbons in two contrasting colors that were curled like payos. When you tried to take them apart, you had to struggle with all of the packing tape, and you realized that the basket that looked like it had so much food was mostly filled with confetti or fake grass on the bottom.

But we rarely got to open any of the Mishloach manos we received. My mother had us recycle those.

So as I said, this is what my parent did each year. I thought everyone did the same. In fact, I never knew there was such a thing as homemade mishloach manos.

Once, a friend asked me if I wanted to come to her house to help her mother prepare shalach manos along with all of her sisters. (She was one of 7 girls.) I was mystified, having never heard of anyone making their own shalach manos.

I came to the house and saw a table filled with all sorts of candies. It was like a candy wonderland. We formed an assembly line where we put different types of candies into small boxes and those into a bigger box. It was the first time I heard of anyone preparing their own arrangements. But still, the food could not be considered "homemade".

I remember walking home from her house that night with a small clear box filled with gumballs that her mother let me take home as thanks for helping them pack. I was floating.

Honestly, I don't remember ever receiving any homemade food for shalach manos. Except for once. And my mother threw it straight into the trash.

As a teen, I did prepare my own mishloach manos for my friends. Every year, on Taanis Esther, I would go to the grocery and fill the shopping cart with every nosh I ever desired, and stuffed those little shiny bags with nosh.

And then I got married. In the early years, we lived in Yerushalayim. And that's when I was introduced to a whole new concept of Mishloach manos.

Came Purim morning and, one by one, my American neighbors brought over their adorable kids and the most stunning, delicious homemade mishloach manos. Cakes, kugels, salads etc. Each one was lovingly and painstakingly prepared. And the themes! I had never heard of themes! I was fascinated by the idea that the costumes matched the mishloach manos.

But I loved them. It's been so many years, but I still remember some of the themes my neighbors did. My friend Rivky dressed her kids up as bakers with big white poofy hats, and they delivered yummy homemade chocolate babka in a white bakery box, tied with a red and white string. This sounds pretty passe today, but for me this was the height of creativity. My other friend, whose last name is Frank, delivered potato knishes and franks-in-blanks, with mini packs of ketchup and mustard. It included an adorable poem connecting all the food to Purim, and they signed it, from the Franks (in blanks).

In return, I gave her a colorful wicker basket with assorted junk that I picked up at the makolet the day before. I didn't know any better.

Today it's all about themes and poems. People start thinking about their themes months in advance. But at the time, for me, this was a totally new experience.

At the end of that Purim, I decided that, come the following year, I would do something homemade as well.

A few days later, I came across a letter to the editor in the Hamodia or Yated (the English Mishpacha didn't exist at the time). Someone wrote how she always receives tons of nosh, which she doesn't really appreciate. But the one thing she appreciated was that every year, a certain neighbor delivers a lukshin kugel. She puts it straight into the freezer, and is able to pull it out erev Pesach when she is too busy to cook for Shabbos. It was such a chessed.

This resonated with me. What a great idea! And I decided right then and there, this would be my THING. I stored it in the back of my mind until the following Purim.

So, a few days before the next Purim, I went out to get small tins, and ingredients to make my lukshin kugels.

The first batch of kugels were sitting and cooling on the counter when my sister, who was in seminary at the time, walked in. She immediately dug into one of the kugels. (Seminary girls are always starving.)

When she was halfway through the pan, she asked me what these are for and I told her they were for Mishloach manos. She gave me a LOOK.

"You serious?" I nodded.
She said, "OMG! (or the equivalent. OMG had not been invented yet. ) That is SOOO nerdy! Please don't tell me you're giving out lukshin kugels!"

I started to get defensive and told her that there's nothing nerdy about it, and people will appreciate having a yummy lukshin kugel in the weeks leading up to Pesach.

She looked at me like I lost my marbles and said, "No one will eat them. They are going to go straight into the garbage!" (Remember, she grew up in the same home as me.)

"Do yourself a favor," she continued, "Go to the store. Buy some bottles of wine and a couple of nice boxes of chocolates, tie them with a fancy ribbon, and you're good to go!"

I told her she has no idea what she's talking about, and that - on the contrary- giving boxes of CHOCOLATES was nerdy, and I am sticking to my lukshin kugels. But suddenly my kugels started to look a little pathetic to me.

Later, I was talking to a friend. This friend is uber-yeshivish and, to me, was the ultimate in good sense. I was sure she would appreciate my idea. I told her that I was planning to give out homemade sweet lukshin kugels.

She said, "What? Are you for real??"
"Yes," said I, "what's wrong with that?"
"I don't know how to tell you this," she said, "but you can't give out lukshin kugels."
I was seriously surprised. I totally expected her to like my idea.

"What's wrong with kugels?"
"It's just so nerdy! Look, I have an idea for you. Why don't you get those fancy boxes of chocolates, add a nice bottle of wine, and tie it together with a red ribbon. It nice, it's classy, and it's so much more appreciated. "

I couldn't believe my ears. It was as if my friend and my sister were both reading from the same script. Were they in cahoots with each other?

I felt defeated. I looked at my nerdy lukshin kugels wistfully, and... put them into the freezer so that I can pull them out before Pesach.

When my husband came home, I asked him if he could please buy some boxes of chocolates and wine for shalach manos. Oh, and a roll of ribbon.

"I thought you said you were giving out lukshin kugels."
"I changed my mind."

I had completely lost my excitement for shalach manos. I made my sister come on erev Purim to assemble the "classy" shalach manos and tie the ribbons.

That year on Purim, once again, I was amazed at the creative, delicious mishloach manos all my friends gave out. I loved reading the poems and marveled at the funny puns. And I was "classy" with my fancy boxes of chocolates.

Since then, I studied this subject a bit and learned that the optimal way to fulfill this mitzva is to give foods that are real. So Laffy taffies and candy corn are out. One can debate whether fancy chocolates are "real." But since then, every year I try to give food that could be eaten as a meal. If people throw out my food, well, they don't tell me about it.

I've given out deli sub sandwiches, tuna bagels, cut up veggies and a dip, vegetable soup with Melba toast...and I always get feedback that people really appreciate having some normal food to put into their systems while running around on empty all day.

So I have strayed far from my roots. My shalach manos look nothing like those that I grew up with. But I don't think my mother is disappointed in me. She has come a long way as well.

I have more to say on this subject but I will end this here. For now.

Hope you all have a wonderful day!

ShishKabob ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 11:15 am

Why wouldn't the potato kugel lady give potato kugel? And you get extra brownie points if it comes piping hot. Trust me people will love it. (especially the guys) You can also wrap it really nice and add a chocolate and a bottle of wine if you want!

dena613

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 11:26 am

Agreed!
Forget the piping hot part, though.

Make it in mini tin pans, like little rectangular3x5... But what goes with potato kugel? A soda can? A pickle?
Not sure.

grace413

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 11:33 am

I would be happy thrilled to receive a lukshen kugel for MM. Or a potato kugel, I don't discriminate.

amother

NeonPurple ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 11:34 am

Kugel and cole slaw

TravelHearter

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 11:36 am

The problem with fresh is that you have to make sure it freezes well/ it has to be packaged right before. People also are traveling around with the MM as they go delivering and the food can go bad and go to waste. I would hate working on something so hard for it to go to waste.

BH Yom Yom

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 11:37 am

I would love to receive a potato kugel for shalach manos!

amother

Valerian

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 11:39 am

I've given out potato kugel.

amother

NeonGreen

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:15 pm

OP- loved your post! We do candy and chips in Amazing savings bag kinda shalach manos and the kids dress up to whatever they've been talking about all year. (This changes multiple times so I wait until about two weeks before purim to order). But I always am super impressed by the themes and creativity....and happy to leave it to others.

↑ ShishKabob ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:21 pm

TravelHearter wrote:

Don't you think the queen of potato kugel has this figured out? lol
You can use a hot and cold fancy bag for this type of thing. Potato kugel usually lasts a while even while not in the oven or refridgerated.

rainbow dash ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:26 pm

Great read. I'm making this year a shabbos theme. My husbands fish, (smoke salmon), potato kugel, tomato dip, garlic knots, bottle of wine, fake kiddish cup, pack of chicken soup in a cup and a cake.

↑ ShishKabob ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:28 pm

rainbow dash wrote:

Great read. I'm making this year a shabbos theme. My husbands fish, (smoke salmon), potato kugel, tomato dip, garlic knots, bottle of wine, fake kiddish cup, pack of chicken soup in a cup and a cake.

That sounds huge! How big is your thing?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:31 pm

ShishKabob wrote:

The answer to your question is found in the question itself
Potato kugels must be given fresh. They are not freezable.
To start making kugels on Purim morning is a huge patchke.
Lukshin kugel, on the other hand, freezes nicely.

↑ rainbow dash

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:33 pm

ShishKabob wrote:

That sounds huge! How big is your thing?

I'm making the cake and kugel in a small aluminium. I have plates from a few years ago that I never used and it doesn't matter what theme I make, dh always adds his fish and a bottle of wine.

↑ ShishKabob ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:38 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Can I disagree with you here? Why can't it be frozen in advance and rewarmed overnight like an overnight kugel?

WitchKitty ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:41 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

So what's this about?

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Next time I go to England I'll let you know, and I'll make you a kugel, bli neder.

Alternatively, you can fly me over and I'll fill your freezer with kugel. (I have a method to bake them so they taste fresh.)
I am available first week in March, if that works for you. But you will have to have your cleaning lady peel the potatoes.

↑ ShishKabob ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:42 pm

WitchKitty wrote:

gotcha!!!

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:42 pm

ShishKabob wrote:

Can I disagree with you here? Why can't it be frozen in advance and rewarmed overnight like an overnight kugel?

I have tried it. It doesn't taste as good.
The only time I would use a frozen kugel (toserve others) is in the cholent. For my family I would be less makpid.

Plus, even if it was good, if you are making just a few kugels, fine. But if you are making a lot (and we give out over 50) it becomes too much of a hassle. And I only have one oven.

↑ ShishKabob

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:44 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I have tried it. It doesn't taste good.
The only time I would use a frozen kugel is in the cholent.
Plus, even if it was good, if you are making just a few kugels, fine. But if you are making a lot (and we give out over 50) ot becomes too much of a hassle. And I only have one oven.

I guess you're not just giving these small 4 x 4 pans. You think big like 5x8..... I hear you! No issues with me! I'll take whatever you make or wrap! Smile

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Feb 17 2022, 12:46 pm

ShishKabob wrote:

gotcha!!!

I explained that in a later post.
You can freeze RAW potato kugel batter. And then when you bake it, it tastes fresh. But not rewarming already baked kugels.
Ain Afia Achar afia.

So why, you may ask, don't I freeze a bunch of raw potato kugels and bake on the morning of Purim? It takes a very long time to bake and I need the oven for other things.

Stay tuned for part 2. I will explain more.