Help! Buffet for 150!

DVOM ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:25 am

Well, this is an interesting turn of events. I need help!

Invitations to my son's small, backyard bar mitzvah have gone out. This is our first bar mitzvah, so perhaps we can blame some of this insanity on my lack of experience? I had anticipated about 80 people to dinner, about 120 to dessert. Big, but manageable. After all, I've hosted my extended family many times, a crowd of about 50. So this would be double that. I've hosted my entire neighborhood plus family for a buffet dessert, also a large crowd, perhaps 100 people, also manageable. What I did not anticipate is that almost every single invitation sent came back with a yes.

I'm flattered. I'm delighted, actually. I love parties. I love my people. I dearly love my son, I'm so proud of him, I'm so excited for him. I love that our friends and family want to come and celebrate with us. Best we can figure, there will be about 150 people to dinner, many more to dessert.

But I'm also panic-stricken. I have no idea how I'm going to host and feed this many people. I don't even know if our yard can fit this many people. Time to recalibrate! Deep breaths!

A bunch of questions:

First in my mind is food. How much food do I need to feed 150 people? I'm more concerned about dinner than dessert. Dessert will be more of a milling around, nibbling a bit, saying mazal tov, and going home sort of things. We'll have a hot dessert section (cinnamon buns, plum cobbler, jumbo melty choc chip cookies), assorted nibbles, cupcakes, and cookies, a coffee and cocoa bar, fruit, and we're having an ice cream truck for soft-serve ice cream and slurpies. Dinner is what is making me really nervous. Dinner guests need to be fed an actual meal. And they need someplace to sit while they eat it.

We've gone back and forth on the menu, but here's what we've settled on as per my bar mitzvah boy's fantasies of the perfect bar mitzvah menu. It's not typical, but he's delighted with it. We were planning on serving buffet style:

Soup bar: zucchini potato, french onion, not sure about what the third soup will be. I'm thinking minestrone. Make your own salad bar, breads (bagels, rolls, garlic bread, sourdough) and spreads (cream cheese, butter, tuna, avocado).

In Sterno burners: Mini pizzas, pancakes, mac and cheese, fettuccini alfredo, penne vodka, lasagna, some sort of veg, salmon, potato gratin.

I'd like to have some sort of starter course on the tables for when people first come and find their seats. Not sure what though. We've nixed many ideas as either too expensive (individual fondu pots) or not what our bar mitzva boy likes (sushi- so easy, so gross in his culinary opinion.) Were thinking of several varieties of chips and dips. I think this could be fun.. Individual plates of chips and dips? In the center of each table? We'd probably do ripple chips with sour cream and onion dip, pretzels with honey mustard dip, and taco chips with salsa. It's more of a snack than a starter. Can I get away with this?

Dear ladies: HELP!

I have no clue how much of each of these foods to prepare (I also have no idea how I'm going to muster the time and energy to prepare all of this, but that's another conversation. If I see I'm running out of time and stamina, I can always buy some of it.). Have any of you hosted a crowd this big? How do I calculate portions? For example, how many 9x13 pans of pasta do I need? How much salad fixings? How much bread?

We'd thought to borrow tables and chairs from our neighborhood's gamach and to supplement with some of our own folding tables and chairs, but we're going to need a lot more tables and chairs than that. Where can we borrow (ideally) or rent (less ideal) tables and chairs???

We're also a bit stumped about the setup. Without seeing the space though, I doubt any of you guys will be able to help this with me. Initially, we thought we could do all of it under one big tent in the front yard. This would have been manageable for the crowd I was anticipating. But this larger crowd just won't fit. We have a large side lawn, a smaller back patio. We have a large backyard, but it's wooded and rustic and slants down to a lake and doesn't really lend itself to tables and chairs. Can I set up seating wrapping around the house? Too weird?

hodeez

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:26 am

Wow no idea or suggestions but good luck 😃 lmk if there are leftovers ☺️

↑ DVOM ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:28 am

hodeez wrote:

Wow no idea or suggestions but good luck 😃 lmk if there are leftovers ☺️

Help! Help! Help! I'm scared there will be no leftovers. I'm scared my guests will leave starving. I'm scared!

lk1234

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:30 am

DVOM wrote:

Wow- I don't have any answers but just wanted to say that for reason your posts bring me joy. I enjoy reading about the yummy food, the parties, the setup - am I the only one Smile

↑ DVOM ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:37 am

lk1234 wrote:

Wow- I don't have any answers but just wanted to say that for reason your posts bring me joy. I enjoy reading about the yummy food, the parties, the setup - am I the only one Smile

This bar mitzvah has filled me with so much joy too. But now it's also filling me with panic.

Help!!!

amother

Green

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:40 am

1. Sounds delicious and full of simcha. Mazal tov.

2. How about a cold soup? Gazpacho or fruit soup?
Get the smaller bowls. You have a lot of food stations. You don't need huge bowls of soup. I think they are 5oz size, (but check) and use that size to work out how much you need.
Make sure the bowls are sturdy, people will be carrying hot soup in them.

3. Re seating. You can get thin chairs that go with relatively small tables. If people are getting up to get food, you need more space between the tables.

4. Not everyone is going to eat every different thing. You don't need 150 mini pizzas, for example.

5. Mazal tov!

amother

Indigo ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:41 am

150 people aren’t coming to your entire bar mitzvah. Many of them will pop in and leave.

There are plenty of gemachs so you can borrow from multiple if you’d like. It’s definitely more work than renting.

I think you should set things up in whatever way will work. If it means wrapping around the house then do it.

imasinger

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:44 am

Mazel tov!

First, of course you can "get away" with chips and dips in the middle of the table. If you like, you can add some cut veggies.

Second, for amounts, think about how much you were planning for 75-80 guests, and double it. That will probably be more than enough, but better too much than too little.

Totally fine to wrap tables and chairs around the house, your guests will thank you for giving them space to hear each other.

It's helpful to find an IRL friend who likes organizing, and ask for help. She'll be happy to offer advice and possibly practical help, and you'll feel more relaxed. Don't be afraid to reach out and ask, it's a sure win.

Auf simchas!

amother

Smokey ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:47 am

Regarding tables and chairs, check to see if there is a gemach that has enough for you. I am not in Lakewood, but I do have a table and chairs gemach and I do have more than you would need. Perhaps Lakewood has as well. (I have 300 chairs and 3 kinds of tables 30 of one kind, 25 of another and 12 of another)

Regarding food. You sound like you have plenty.
I would check a catering menu, and see how much each 9x13 tray officially serves and take it from there.

exaustedmom

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:47 am

First of all Mazel tov!!

Your menu sounds fabulous! I'm not sure you have to make a huge variety, but make sure to make alot of what you do make.

amother

Beige ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:48 am

I say it's def ok to set up seating around the house. Can you get speakers to every area so ppl can hear what's going on even if they can't see the speaker? I like the chip n dip idea. It's affordable and cute and sounds like there's lots of other food. Maybe add a salad to balance out health? A sushi salad? Way easier than sushi and adults can appreciate.

Im thinking a 9/13 pan feeds about 10 people. You don't need enough of each dish to feed everyone but 10 of each pan should be enough. Maybe more of the dishes you anticipate people wanting more of and less of the less favored dishes.

Sounds so fun and delicious! Good luck!

amother

Pearl

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:48 am

How about some egg rolls in the middle of the table?

Or some rolls and dips with salads.

Or a plated potatoe blintz with mushroom sauce.

amother

Ginger ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:48 am

I think you're trying to make your son happy and that's really sweet. I feel like I'd do the same thing. But..I really think your bringing unnecessary stress on yourself. Think about all the times you have gone to an event. Yes, some people enjoy eating at an event but for most people it's not everything.

You really don't need three soups, especially with everything else being offered.

You need to imagine you're a guest. I think you can definitely tone it down a little. For example tortillas and salsa and guacamole? Sounds awesome! You don't need so many choices for each thing you already have plenty of food!

As far as making your son happy. Yes he needs to be involved and enjoy everything but it's your job to make him realize that people are coming bc they love him and not to be totally wowed and amazed by everything. It sounds like he's so focused on having everything sio perfect and just what he likes.
If sushi is easy for you but he doesn't like it he shouldn't worry so much. If he's a huge foodie then let him have a birthday supper where he can eat what he wants.
This should be a time for him where he feels so happy and like he's the most important person jn the room but I don't see why he needs to like ALL the food choices

Frumme

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:53 am

How is your front yard set up? Is there a a fence etc? If not, can you ask your neighbors if they would mind if you could "borrow" their front yard space? Even rent it from them if they are hesitant.

Also I hope you're hiring 1-2 waiters even with the buffet style set up. You will need people to attend to the various needs of your guests (water at tables etc) as well as setting up tables & chairs, breaking down tables & chairs afterwards, tablecloths, etc. You can't do these things all yourself.

As far as food. Make sure you have plenty of carby, cheap, filling foods available. I see that your list of dinners is all milchig. Make sure you have at least 1 pareve option for the dairy adverse or people who came accidentally fleishig. Tofu lo mein or even a plain pasta w/ margarine/olive oil. Quinoa salad with avocado, sauteed onion, roasted sweet potato

DREAMING ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 9:56 am

For a buffet I definitely think you can do seating wrapping around the house. Is it family style or separate seating? If it’s sep seating you can do the men in one area and the ladies in another.

I’d probably do individual plated salad on the table or fruit cup or veggies and dips in the center. But I think just a nice table setting is fine as well.
I also think two soups are enough.

It sounds like a really fun party!

↑ DVOM ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 10:31 am

amother [ Ginger ] wrote:

The pressure is totally not coming from him. It's totally coming from me! I want him to like everything. And I want a wow wow wow party. If I was all about him, I'd buy 30 pies of pizza and call it a day. He'd be delighted. He'd be delighted with anything really. If I said we're doing sushi, he'd say great. This is not a hard to please child. I'm being a hard to please mom-zilla. This was an eye-opening response, thank you for writing it. Oy. DVOM! Calm down! They're all coming because they love you! You don't need to go this crazy! Deep breaths!

amother

Plum ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 10:34 am

First of all Mazal Tov

This is a big under taking
Are you sure you want to cater it yourself
Is it that much cheaper than doing it in a hall

This is what I suggest
1. Go to a tablecloth Gemach and see what they have in stock you’ll need tablecloth for the tables and the buffets
Real tablecloth adds so much to the event and anchors a color scheme. Also think of layering.

After having your menu planned go to serve ware Gemach, plan where each item will go
Planning is your best friend

2. Rent the tables and chairs.
They do all the shlepping. It takes one thing off your plate and it’s cost efficient when you think about gas and going back and forth

3. Food amount, calculate each 9x13 can serve 16 - 20 ppl, because you have a lot of variety. Mini pizza and pancakes 2 pp

Salmon- 1/4lb pp

As far as bread I would calculate 1 bagel for each person and then supplement with your other breads 1 slice per person. You will have leftover- but it’s easily freezeable. Where ever you get your breads have them pre-slice it.
You could use your breads and spreads as a center piece.

Salad bar- I would calculate again a 9x13 of chopped veggie per 20 ppl and double that for mixed greens (they weigh less)

On the table- the chips and dips are fine in the center of each table.

Think about what ppl will do with the dirty plates when they are done eating, a lot of ppl serve 2nds on a new plate You are going to need servers to go around clearing the tables.

sky ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 11:14 am

One thing to keep in mind with gemach for table and chairs is the shlepping. You need a lot of man power.
For renting try rent wise. You can get a basic folding chair for 25 cents IIRC.

You are going to need 15 sitting 8ft tables plus Buffett tables. Not everyone will sit at same time.

Buy 3-4x the amount of plates and cutlery as ppl invited.

Do you have space to heat up so much food at one time. Do you need to rent dairy warmers?

Get waiters for setup, serving and cleanup so you can enjoy.

Do you have a rain backup plan? I was recently at a simcha in a city were it doesn’t rain and it was super windy and rainy the day of simcha. They had to find alternate location. Transfer food. Setup. And make all decisions day of. Please have a plan just in case to reduce last minute stress.

Last edited by sky on Sun, Apr 18 2021, 11:17 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Papaya

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 11:14 am

You sound amazing! But me personally - I would do chips and salsa on table - one or two, not 3. One soup, and 2 pasta mains, 3 salads and a fish. Dessert - a bunch. That’s it.....

amother

Mauve ↓

Sun, Apr 18 2021, 11:24 am

exaustedmom wrote:

First of all Mazel tov!!

Your menu sounds fabulous! I'm not sure you have to make a huge variety, but make sure to make alot of what you do make.

Agree, I think fewer choices but a lot of each dish. And I agree with the person who suggested a pareve main dish option. Definitely more paper good than you think you will need. You don't necessarily need professional waiters, you can probably hire a couple of teens to help with setting up, keeping food stocked, and clean up.