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How long does chocolate last in the body?
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amother
OP  


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 7:57 pm
This is a very serious question, and I dare you if you ridicule me for this, regardless whether you are staying home this Pesach, are a newlywed, are chassidish, take in your sister's kids postpartum, or watch OTD movies.

Here's the thing. According to our minhag, we do not eat chocolate on Pesach. You hear? No chocolate for 7 days! (We do relax the rules on Achron when I break the chocolate fast).

So to the question, does a human body have the capability of storing chocolate? So I can eat up now and reserve it as camel humps do?
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lilies  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 7:59 pm
Yes! The human body actually stores it better than the camels do. It will take you a few years to get back to your pre-chocolate days.
Go ahead, indulge.
Then start sweating it out.
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amother
Cobalt


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 7:59 pm
If you eat up a lot of chocolate now - you will def. get camel like bumps.
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 8:00 pm
chocolate is allowed during hurricanes & pandemics ... you're welcome !!!

but chocolate sits on your hips forever Wink Tongue Out
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amother
Maroon  


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 8:11 pm
I am not asking you to identify yourself, but please be sure to disclose this during shiduchim. My daughter would not be able to marry your son. In our family, a lack of chocolate would be grounds for divorce.
What about the chocolate can you not have? Is it the processedness? Coco-bean itself? Maybe we can find a workaround for you.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 8:15 pm
amother [ Maroon ] wrote:
What about the chocolate can you not have? Is it the processedness? Coco-bean itself? Maybe we can find a workaround for you.

I should assume something about mishing and finished products. We do use cocoa.
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  lilies




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 8:20 pm
Are you chassidish? Sounds chassidish to me. I could never live like that, it would be too traumatizing. Oy, you must feel so deprived. My great-uncle's second cousin is chassidish and her Rav said she can eat chocolate only on chol hamoed.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 8:28 pm
lilies wrote:
Are you chassidish? Sounds chassidish to me. I could never live like that, it would be too traumatizing. Oy, you must feel so deprived. My great-uncle's second cousin is chassidish and her Rav said she can eat chocolate only on chol hamoed.

We don't hold by that Rav probably.
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amother
  Maroon


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 8:30 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I should assume something about mishing and finished products. We do use cocoa.


If you use cocoa, all is not lost. Google making chocolate with cocoa powder.

It may be long and arduous, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
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amother
White


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 8:31 pm
Didn't you hear? Many many rabbonim are saying to relax most chumros as needed this year. I am sure this is a matter that qualifies as very necessary to ones mental health.

(DH doesn't use most products, just the very basics like milk, sugar, potato starch, cocoa, oil, wine, matzah, fruits & veg. Is that everything? Oh, yes, meat, chicken, eggs, fish. But I decided a few years ago that he DOES NOT get to decide on chumros for me. No, it's not his family's minhag, just s/t he wanted to take on. Go right ahead, just leave me out of it!)

P.S. I only eat plain chocolate, no Torino or truffles etc. Cause that's what I like.
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crust  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 8:43 pm
How long does chocolate last in the body?

I would say you should start testing right now.

Eat a bar right now. See how many hours until you feel the need for another one.

Tomorrow morning take another bar and be conscious.

Repeat every day until Pesach. I hope you'll figure this out. Uch! What a dilemma!

Hugs. This is tough.

You know what Yoli Lebowitz says...

אוי ווען משיח וועט קומען און מען וועט שוין מעגן עסן OU....
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InnerMe




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 8:44 pm
Why would anyone take this any less than seriously?????

Here's my super knowledgeable, expert answer.

Chocolate stays in the body for 21.5 days.

You can even savor the pleasure of it if you know how to tune into it in a very specific way (way too complicated to go into depth here)

But suffice to say it WILL stay in your body throughout Pesach and you won't emerge chocolate starved.

You don't even need to eat on achron shell Pesach, because you still got 14.5 days to go until it disintegrates.

Although of course, you could because no such thing as too much chocolate.

Oh! One minor detail I forgot - it only lasts 21.5 days if you fill your body at list 2/3 capacity with chocolate.
(yeah counting everything, bones, muscles.. you name it)

Otherwise there's no telling how soon it will disappear. I once saw a client (I specialize in these kinda stuff, you can book an appointment) who did 2 ounces less then 2/3rd of her body's capacity and the chocolate vanished after an hour.

I don't want the same misfortune to happen to you. Good luck!
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Einikel




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 9:07 pm
OP I’m appalled by your double standards. No chocolate but cocoa is fine?! The problems run deeper than chocolate. It symbolizes way more.
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amother
Ivory


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 9:16 pm
All the chocolate I have ever consumed is tucked away around my middle.
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Cookie Monster




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 9:21 pm
I am Chassidish. We dont eat chocolate seven days prior to pesach for this very reason. Chocolate is not even allowed to BE in your body on Pesach. I know for a fact that all Chassidim have this minhag.
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enneamom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 9:25 pm
CHOCOLATE is roshei teivos

CHok
Oleinu
Col (kol)
Ovdei Hashem
L'echol
Asach
Tsocholad

So it's a helige minhag to eat as much chocolate as possible all year, and especially on Pesach -- almost as heilig as tying a goat to your bed and teaching him to sing chad gadya.
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bnm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 10:18 pm
this year it is a matter of mental health.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 11:14 pm
crust wrote:
How long does chocolate last in the body?

I would say you should start testing right now.

Eat a bar right now. See how many hours until you feel the need for another one.

Tomorrow morning take another bar and be conscious.

Repeat every day until Pesach. I hope you'll figure this out. Uch! What a dilemma!

Hugs. This is tough.

You know what Yoli Lebowitz says...

אוי ווען משיח וועט קומען און מען וועט שוין מעגן עסן OU....

Oh, I do this test everyday. It lasts for about 23.5 nano seconds.
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Cookiegirl  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 11:24 pm
By us, we are noheig to only eat chocolate for all 8 days of Pesach. It's awesome! We start during the seder when each kid who says the Mah Nishtana gets their own bar and it's off to the races. Of course, we are yotzei with the matzah (chocolate covered) and marror (dipped in...you know) and all that seder stuff off the bat, but after that, it's all chocolate, all the time!
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amother
Brunette


 

Post Thu, Apr 02 2020, 11:48 pm
Im assuming you mean parve chocolate.
Otherwise how will you eat fleishigs? 🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫
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