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-> In the News
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ora_43
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 Wed, Nov 13 2019, 4:33 am
warning dark humor -
"A man plans for his 72 virgins his whole life, and then when the time finally comes, his wife comes with him."
(on Islamic Jihad commander Baha abu al-Ata, whose wife also died in the assassination)
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gingertop
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 4:39 am
| ora_43 wrote: | warning dark humor -
"A man plans for his 72 virgins his whole life, and then when the time finally comes, his wife comes with him."
(on Islamic Jihad commander Baha abu al-Ata, whose wife also died in the assassination) |
LOL!
On that note, one of my favorite comedy scenes
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morningsickness
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 4:40 am
or this one:
What's the first thing the education minister does when he becomes minister of defense? Gives the teachers a day off! 
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morningsickness
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 4:42 am
wish I could include a picture with this one:
you know the Yoplait yogurts that have a time of day advertised on the cover?
The joke goes like this:
"I live in Cholon. I am never eating a Yoplait again for as long as I live! (advertisement on yogurt he was eating said: 6:59- begining of BALAGAN)"
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gingertop
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 4:44 am
| ora_43 wrote: | More jokes:
"Our country's like an old-school appliance. When it stops working, just give it a few hard whacks from the side. Then it starts up again." |
This but unironically.
I complain about different things but I love this country so so much and when we're being attacked I'm reminded of how much I love it so, it hurts.
People here are so kind and so brave and so funny.
I love y'all. Stay safe!
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Aylat
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 4:46 am
| slushiemom wrote: | I've been praying for 6 months to have good weather for my oldest son's bar mitzvah at the Kotel next week.
The date finally crept into the long term forecast and it looks gorgeous, bH- very annoyed that I have to be worried about rockets instead!!
I'll be so sad if my family coming in from America cancels their trip. |
Mazel tov! I hope they make it and you all celebrate together in peace.
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PinkFridge
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 7:05 am
| Aylat wrote: | | Mazel tov! I hope they make it and you all celebrate together in peace. |
And iy"H, may Moshiach come by then and we all join you!
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gingertop
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 7:18 am
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"Naftali Benett is taking religious coercion to the next level. Making all students run to Mamad."
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gingertop
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 7:25 am
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"Only in Israel do all the neighbors go out to take a selfie with a rocket that drops by"
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Rappel
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:38 am
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Ooh, someone just sent me a fabulous video, but I'm not sure how to upload it here. Anyone understand imamother's coding better than I?
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imasoftov
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:56 am
| Rappel wrote: | | Ooh, someone just sent me a fabulous video, but I'm not sure how to upload it here. Anyone understand imamother's coding better than I? |
Imamother doesn't let you upload videos (pictures, too). It has to be stored somewhere else on the internet.
Imamother works best with YouTube, surround the URL of a YT video with youtube and /youtube in brackets. Or just hit the little icon that looks like this  to get the youtube and /youtube tags and put the URL between them.
If the video is stored at another site, you can just post the URL and people can click on it to see the video. If you were sent a link to a video (by email, text, whatsapp, etc.) you can do that.
However if they emailed (etc.) you the actual video and it's on your computer, phone, or other device, that won't work. If that's the case (or you don't know if it's on your device or on the internet) it may be better to ask someone for help in real life.
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Aylat
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 10:33 am
| gingertop wrote: | | "Naftali Benett is taking religious coercion to the next level. Making all students run to Mamad." |
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lech lecha08
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 1:50 pm
| morningsickness wrote: | or this one:
What's the first thing the education minister does when he becomes minister of defense? Gives the teachers a day off! |
I saw a Hebrew one in the same vein.
When the Minister of Education becomes the Minister of Defense, he first worries about the teachers
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gingertop
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 2:51 pm
Not a joke, but I was just came back from a wedding and someone there was on her way to another wedding, in Ashdod. The Ashdod wedding is being in a bomb shelter hall.
So all the ladies were talking about all the Simchos that happened under rocket and Scud fire. One woman had a baby during the Gulf War and the hospital had a whole bunch of babies each in a large box with bleach soaked towels around to filter out poisonous gas (which didn't end up happening b"h). We were all talking about pregnancies, births, bar mitzvas and weddings that happened under fire.
Never a dull moment in the Middle East.
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FranticFrummie
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 3:40 pm
| PinkFridge wrote: | | And iy"H, may Moshiach come by then and we all join you! |
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ora_43
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Thu, Nov 14 2019, 12:31 am
from Facebook this morning -
"Hi, I'm looking for a family from the South who can host my ex-husband for the next few days."
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DrMom
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Thu, Nov 14 2019, 12:46 am
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So fun to wake the kids from a sound sleep to run into the shelter last night.
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Teomima
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Thu, Nov 14 2019, 2:45 am
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I gotta say, I really love how us Israelis deal with so much by finding the humor in it. My extended family whatsapp group had been full of these and other jokes about the situation, along with translations and explanations for the chulnikim (but I don't think they fully appreciate the humor).
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SacN
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Thu, Nov 14 2019, 7:01 am
| Quote: |
So fun to wake the kids from a sound sleep to run into the shelter last night. |
Us too! Ugh.  
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