Please say tehiilem for my 81 year old mom with lung cancer

amother

OP ↓

Sun, Aug 18 2019, 7:33 am

she is diagnosed with stage four cancer and just had a trach put it and a peg for food
she has been in hospice then taken to a hospital where she has been unrespnosive for three
weeks she is on a respirator .please daven that they should take the trach and peg out
thank you
esther bat chana fruma
I have lost all hope

FranticFrummie

Sun, Aug 18 2019, 7:36 am

May she have an easy and painless passing.

We are in the weeks of consolation. I wish you and your family lots of comfort in the coming days. Hug

PinkFridge ↓

Sun, Aug 18 2019, 8:57 am

Hugs, hugs, and more hugs!

This is such a painful tekufah. I will share something personal that my mother wrote as she was niftar this time of the year: This too is part of the year that Hashem wrote up for us.

I hope that she is comfortable, that you/the decision makers have a good rav to help you guide you through this, and that you feel the loving hand of Hashem every step of the way.

amother

Cerulean ↓

Sun, Aug 18 2019, 9:08 am

I’m so sorry for you. I hope you are surrounded by those who can give you a virtual hug. May g-d give you the strength to get through this. I will daven for her.

If you’d like I can pm you a poem I wrote when I was sitting with my mom before she passed.

amother

↑ Cerulean ↓

Sun, Aug 18 2019, 10:43 am

I Decided to post it here instead, I once posted it already before my mom passed away.

Dear mom,

When you will
Be gone forever
Never to be
Seen again

When your touch
Will have no warmth
Left alone
Down below

A piece of me
Will be there
Sitting still
By your side

And my being
Will for always
Never be
Whole again

But today
You are sitting
Right here
By my side

And I will
stay in the moment
as it
Passes by

↑ PinkFridge ↓

Sun, Aug 18 2019, 9:10 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

thank you all, yes I would love to read the poem ,

I'm glad that you found solace from this thread.
I want to say something to some people reading this thread. I want to believe that the words "refuah shleimah" are always appropriate. But there is a point where "rachamei Shamayim" is in order. Not that it isn't always, but it is especially appropriate. Some of you may have never been through this. There is that point where one has to fully accept all possibilities, even if not believing in them. (And ymmv; I don't judge people who do believe in them. I've done it myself, circumstances vary.)

OP, I hope you have the koach you need to get through this, and that you see many lights along the way; you might be surprised by those moments of grace, they are there.

Cheiny

Sun, Aug 18 2019, 10:07 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Refuah shelaima

amother

Bisque

Sun, Aug 18 2019, 10:41 pm

I just went through this painful experience. This poem made me cry...exactly expressed my feelings...My heart is with you...Hashem should do what is best for your Mom. Hope she doesn't suffer. Hugs to you and your family.
My mother was just niftar...onto a better place, hopefully.

↑ PinkFridge ↓

Mon, Aug 19 2019, 7:32 am

amother [ Bisque ] wrote:

Hopefully...definitely.
She now has the answers that we all crave.
She has been met by her parents, grandparents...going all the way back to the avos and imahos who are telling her, well done, and thanking her for raising children who are perpetuating all they lived and died for.
And she's not in pain anymore.

amother

↑ Cerulean ↓

Mon, Aug 19 2019, 7:53 am

amother [ Bisque ] wrote:

I'm sorry for your experience and that you lost your mom. My mothered suffered a LOT before she passed. I remember looking at her when she was nifter and relief washed over me and I thought "nobody and nothing can hurt her anymore" . That thought was a nechama to me.

Op how is your mom today? How are you doing?

ProudMommie

Mon, Aug 19 2019, 8:17 am

PinkFridge wrote:

So well said.. and the truth

amother

↑ Cerulean

Mon, Aug 19 2019, 9:51 am

ny21 wrote:

I’m
Doing ok
Thanks for asking
I’m crying .thanks for asking
My 91 year old father stays with her all day

Wishing you lots of strength to get through today.
FYI, You didn’t go anonymous.

↑ PinkFridge

Mon, Aug 19 2019, 2:58 pm

ny21 wrote:

I’m
Doing ok
Thanks for asking
I’m crying .thanks for asking
My 91 year old father stays with her all day

My mother's note also said, Love Totty and help each other.
But at this point, your father will need help too. I wish you koach, and if you have siblings, that you work together b'shalom through these stages.