What is chassidish life like?

↑ Mama Bear ↓

Tue, Jul 24 2007, 6:02 pm

1. arita, feel free to post all your questions in this thread, I dont have a problem with it.

2. I'll respond to the robe question with several sub-answers.

a. since when are robes untzniusdig? they are just as tzniusdige as clothing - tight robes are not tzniusdig, loose robes are.

b. why wear a robe at home? Because it is 10X more comfortable than a skirt and blouse.

c. most women do NOT wear robes outside the house. they will wear it when going to the bus to put the kids on or take them off, or to the corner grocery, but when going shopping etc they get fully dressed.

↑ amother ↓

Tue, Jul 24 2007, 7:41 pm

The robes I see women wearing outside I don't consider tznius b/c they look like something ONLY to be worn in one's home, not outside! They may be tznius according to halacha, but it just makes me think that they came from their bedroom, without bothering to get dressed properly. This is just my opinion.

↑ amother ↓

Tue, Jul 24 2007, 8:12 pm

Quote:

since when are robes untzniusdig? they are just as tzniusdige as clothing - tight robes are not tzniusdig, loose robes are.

I dont think they are tznius because u can see the shape of woman in them, even if they are loose! also, they arent attractive at all. at least the ones I see beong worn out.... dont people want to be attractive for thier husbands?????

↑ chocolate moose ↓

Tue, Jul 24 2007, 8:28 pm

ladies wear a nightgown in their bedrooms, not a robe or housedress.

↑ creativemommyto3 ↓

Wed, Jul 25 2007, 10:33 am

Breslov mentioned in the minhag hamokom thread that she wears her most chassidish outfit when going to a chassidishe event. What is a " chassidishe " outfit?

↑ creativemommyto3 ↓

Sat, Jul 28 2007, 2:34 pm

downsyndrome:I was discussing this thread with my husband cuz I am not either gung-ho on shaving, even though I do it religiously (pun intended!). My husband told me that tremendous concepts are brought down from Zohar about shaving. In addition, we discussed the poster who wrote that even though she is chassidish, she and her husband have decided that it is repulsive to be shaved and in order to enhance the intimacy of their marriage they both decided that she will not shave (and in order to prevent her husband from looking for 'extra-curricular activities').
Without condemning, only questioning, my husband was curious whether this couple discussed this with a rav. We went into this lengthy discussion about the importance of upholding minhagim in the family. My husband brought to my attention, that which I had never realized before, that in Hebrew the word minhag, when read backwards, is ge-hinnom (ch'v). This is to prove how important it is to keep minhagim, otherwise the reverse carries lots of weight. My husband also pointed out to me that if we don't follow the minhagim of our parents, and our children see that, then what should make them follow OUR minhagim? What would happen if our children would want to become even more lax with observing certain religious aspects, which eventually runs into halacha too? This is a very, very strong point.
Any opinions?
I am just remembering something interesting. My parents-in-law don't eat fish on Pesach; they eat falscha fish. Several years ago, when my father-in-law ran into some health issues he thought it would be lighter for him to eat fish than so much poultry and meat during Pesach. At that point my in-laws were also using only schmaltz. They asked the SAtmar dayan and he paskened that they may use oil, but he did not allow them to start eating fish, even though thousands of erlicha yidden are eating fish on Pesach and it is 1,000% okay. But, he told my father-in-law, Pesach is very much based on family minhagim and don't break this one; you'll be okay. My in-laws are still eating only falsch fish and my husband and I eat only falscha fish on Pesach, even though my parents a'h ate fish.

What is falscha fish? Why don't you eat fish on pesach? What other things don't you do on pesach and why?

↑ sarahd ↓

Sat, Jul 28 2007, 8:41 pm

Falsche fish is a dish that looks like gefilte fish but is made from ground chicken (and sometimes veal too.) Many people have a minhag not to eat fish on Pesach because the fish in der alte heim was preserved with alcohol.

shoy18

Sat, Jul 28 2007, 10:46 pm

I might be mistaken, but when a couple gets married cant they start their own minhagim?

↑ amother ↓

Sat, Jul 28 2007, 11:08 pm

Quote:

I might be mistaken, but when a couple gets married cant they start their own minhagim?

We took some minhagim from his family and some from mine and dropped some from his or mine when it interfered with one another.

↑ Mama Bear ↓

Sun, Jul 29 2007, 12:09 am

amother wrote:

Quote:

since when are robes untzniusdig? they are just as tzniusdige as clothing - tight robes are not tzniusdig, loose robes are.

attractive is a relative thing. While maybe your husband would find a shaved head, turban and robe repulsive, the men in our community do not find this unattractive. They rather find the shlumpy clothes you consider 'clothes' - a sweatshirt, tshirt, or blouse worn outside - with a long skirt, denim or otherwise, and bobbysox with sneakers - extremely unattractive. A neat, clean, pretty robe is far more attractive in their eyes.

I own exactly two outfits, both of them being too uncomfortable to wear while doing housework. I wear them when shopping, but wear a robe during the day otherwise.

↑ Mama Bear ↓

Sun, Jul 29 2007, 12:12 am

arita430 wrote:

Breslov mentioned in the minhag hamokom thread that she wears her most chassidish outfit when going to a chassidishe event. What is a " chassidishe " outfit?

there's a certain "style" of dress in the chasidishe communities, it's hard to describe. It's very neat, very tsniusdig (for the most part - there are 'rebels' in every kehillah!), and very classy. We dont just shlep on a solid colored tshirt or shirt and pair it with a random skirt. The outfits are more classy. When she wants to blend in with the neighborhoods she's visiting, she dresses in that style.

↑ amother ↓

Sun, Jul 29 2007, 12:16 am

Quote:

Not ALL husbands in our community are the same, Mamabear. DH definitely finds a sweatshirt, tshirt, or blouse worn outside - with a long skirt, more attractive than a robe and turban.
I see many of my neighbors in skirts and tops rather than a robe. Even robe stores in Williamsburg are selling long skirts and tops. I agree that attractive is relative but it's also relative between one Williamsburger and another.

↑ Mama Bear ↓

Sun, Jul 29 2007, 12:55 am

last amother, youre right. I guess the women who wear robes are those whose dh'd dont mind that look.

↑ creativemommyto3 ↓

Tue, Aug 07 2007, 4:59 am

Well, last monday, I went to the Bostoner Rebbe in Har Nof for my cousin's upsherin. It was really nice. I decided to read up on the Lelov/Bostoner Chassidus. My uncle has the book " A chassidic Journey" that I am in the middle of reading. Has anybody read that book? Is anybody here lelov/boston? I noticed that the rebbetzin wore a hat on top of her sheitel but a woman there who was a bostoner just wore a sheitel. Why is that?

Newsie

Tue, Aug 07 2007, 5:19 am

It may have been just stam that she was wearing a hat on her sheitel. She was not originally a Bostoner. It may just be what she's comfortable with and the Rebbe may not be makpid.

↑ amother ↓

Mon, Dec 03 2007, 8:28 am

I just saw this thread. Boston is not one of the shtarker Chassidisen. I don't think they really have many minhogim of their own. I know something about them cos I have a cousin who married a Bostoner. They don't shave and she drives. She wears a thin band on leil Shabbos but most of them don't cover their sheitels any other time. The Rebbe is very makpid himself with Pesach zachen and also at Succos but he doesn't make so many demands of the chassidim. My cousin now dresses quite modern chassidish. They go out together sometimes to other couples for Shabbos. Very modern American style, not for everyone. P.S. I'm only posting anon because of my cousin. She is a bit defensive about all of this cos she comes from a real shtark chassidus.

Motek ↓

Tue, Dec 04 2007, 7:19 pm

So you define a shtark Chassidus as one in which the woman shaves her head and wears something over her sheitel?

Maya ↓

Tue, Dec 04 2007, 7:40 pm

What is a 'shtark' chassidus anyway??

↑ chocolate moose ↓

Tue, Dec 04 2007, 8:08 pm

and I was shy to say anything !!!

↑ mimivan ↓

Tue, Dec 04 2007, 8:53 pm

Motek wrote:

So you define a shtark Chassidus as one in which the woman shaves her head and wears something over her sheitel?

And doesn't drive...

Sounds like it...but I think it was written way way above, Motek, the distinction between chassidish (including Chabad) and chaseedish (not including Chabad) I.e. hats on sheitels, not driving, shaving etc...