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Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
Lakewood - anyone still school-less?
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  amother  


 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 9:06 pm
amothertoo wrote:
Ha. my daughter actually has a school, not one that you mentioned> We actually felt that schools like Bnos Rivka and AT are not for us. Alot of the mothers are not on the level of tznius that I want, alot of the fathers are not machshuv torah on the level my husband wants, and there are influences in their homes that I do not bring to mine. ( I know this for a fact bc we did apply there and look extensively into it)


So let me get this straughit.

The school's like AT and BR are not "frum" enough for you and of course the fact that you do not want your child there becuase you do not like the "influences" they bring into thier home is perfectly legitimate.

However it's not legitimate for school's to cater toward's parent's who do not like the influence's you allow in your home ect...?
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  amother  


 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 9:08 pm
amothertoo wrote:

Your just as guilty of judging me bc of unimportant details such as letting my kids watch curious George.
Why exactly didn't you mention any other schools for me such as the holy Bais Tova or Bnos Orchos Chaim.
O right, if your sheital is a drop longer than your shoulder there, its ok, bc after all Grandpa gave 50,000.


I actually did not mention either of those two schools because a) Bnos Orchas Chaim is pretty hard to get into b) I don't know much about Bais Tova other then the fact it's supposed to be well run but has a "fancier" clientele.
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Inspire




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 9:35 pm
Not in Lakewood, but had many difficult experiences with yeshiva rejections in other communities. When we meticulously narrow the type of Jew we are willing to associate with until there is so much sinas chinam among us, Hashem sends us something to help us unite .....a churban!
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  amother  


 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 11:10 pm
I'm a dif parent of a girl not in school. We conform to all the rules of this society. My husband learned for nine years in kollel, my sons are in regular top yeshivos. My husband wears white shirts, I dress very conservatively and tzniusdikly. My children do not have computer access or watch videos. Yes now my husband is not in yeshiva. And we've been going through the worst humiliation I have ever experienced in regard to this game called "getting your child into school". The things I've been told... I feel like the victim of an abusive situation. Everyone, including posters here, seem to be blaming me and those in my position for being in the situation I am in. The hurtful things ppl of power in this town have said to me will haunt me forever... We are vulnerable victims at the hands of cruel selfish powerful ppl
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  naturalmom5  




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 11:13 pm
Last poster are you a masochist
Why do just stay for ?
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  amother  


 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 11:18 pm
naturalmom5 wrote:
Last poster are you a masochist
Why do just stay for ?

Thanks, that's just the chizzuk I needed. It's people like you that'll help us keep our dignity intact.
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  amother  


 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 11:22 pm
amother wrote:
I'm a dif parent of a girl not in school. We conform to all the rules of this society. My husband learned for nine years in kollel, my sons are in regular top yeshivos. My husband wears white shirts, I dress very conservatively and tzniusdikly. My children do not have computer access or watch videos. Yes now my husband is not in yeshiva. And we've been going through the worst humiliation I have ever experienced in regard to this game called "getting your child into school". The things I've been told... I feel like the victim of an abusive situation. Everyone, including posters here, seem to be blaming me and those in my position for being in the situation I am in. The hurtful things ppl of power in this town have said to me will haunt me forever... We are vulnerable victims at the hands of cruel selfish powerful ppl

But what kind of things are they telling you??? You're scaring me!!!!!!
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  amother  


 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 11:37 pm
Bribe your way in, compromise all kinds of garbage..
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  amother  


 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 11:49 pm
I am the mother that started this post. My daughter is still not in school but I feel like we are being ignored. We are not getting yelled at or reprimanded, rather we are not getting information and have not been contacted by the vaad even though we informed them Shavuos time that we were without a school. How did the 20+ parents that are sending to the new school hear about it? Did the vaad reach out to you about it?
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  amother  


 

Post Thu, Aug 21 2014, 11:55 pm
We were contacted because we had "pull" but we're not the original batch of "better" ppl that were the first choice. We were rejected rejects.
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  amother  


 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 12:06 am
Are you going to that new school? How long ago did you get in? I only heard about this school last week from the grapevine.
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  amother  


 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 12:51 am
Getting into schools in Lakewood has nothing to do with frumkeit or how Yeshivish a person is. IT IS ALL WHO YOU KNOW and not who you are. The sooner you learn how to play the game the sooner you will get in.
Lakewood is a sick town run by sick individuals who love the power struggle and they love the fact that people shiver in their presence. The town doesn't want too many schools to open because then they lose all their power.

What Lakewood needs is one wealthy individual who doesn't care about power and to open three schools in the same year. I know that when Bnos Orchas Chaim opened and the same year Bnos Devorah opened the Vaad said that for the next three years no new girls school can open because otherwise these schools won't have a chance of succeeding. Now it worked in their favor plus the growth grew too.

We have a problem and if the rabbonim really wanted to fix the problem they would look for a long term solution. Like start opening schools now so that in four years it will be fixed. Why do the rabbonim wait until the night before school to let parents know where they are going.
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  amother  


 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 1:59 am
People don't realize this but the kindergarten morahs a lot of times says bad about the kids or the families. Of course afterwards they deny it. My son the whole year the morah was telling me how ready he was for primary. then all of a sudden when I called her to tell her that the school should be calling her soon and just to prepare her she started a whole thing how she is not sure maybe my son is not ready etc. To make a long story short the school never called my son because they asked me on the interview what did the morah think and at that time I thought the morah was on the same page as me so I said so and the school took my word for it. B"H the school never called the morah. You see I find that Hashem runs the world and it doesn't make sense that the school didn't call the morah but for some reason they didn't and B"H my son got in. If not who knows I probably would be writing here stating how I'm having issues all because of the morah.
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  amother  


 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 7:23 am
amother wrote:
Getting into schools in Lakewood has nothing to do with frumkeit or how Yeshivish a person is. IT IS ALL WHO YOU KNOW and not who you are. The sooner you learn how to play the game the sooner you will get in.
Lakewood is a sick town run by sick individuals who love the power struggle and they love the fact that people shiver in their presence. The town doesn't want too many schools to open because then they lose all their power.

What Lakewood needs is one wealthy individual who doesn't care about power and to open three schools in the same year. I know that when Bnos Orchas Chaim opened and the same year Bnos Devorah opened the Vaad said that for the next three years no new girls school can open because otherwise these schools won't have a chance of succeeding. Now it worked in their favor plus the growth grew too.

We have a problem and if the rabbonim really wanted to fix the problem they would look for a long term solution. Like start opening schools now so that in four years it will be fixed. Why do the rabbonim wait until the night before school to let parents know where they are going.

Thanks for writing this. It is completely true!!! As anyone who lives here knows, though they may not want to admit it...
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  amother  


 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 7:48 am
Yes the power thing is true.. They decide learning ppl get priority most of the time cause it let's them blame the victim and play the game....
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  amother  


 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 7:55 am
amother wrote:

We have a problem and if the rabbonim really wanted to fix the problem they would look for a long term solution. Like start opening schools now so that in four years it will be fixed. Why do the rabbonim wait until the night before school to let parents know where they are going.


This is an important point. It shouldn't be that difficult to do a census of people who currently are living in Lakewood, including births. It can also account for a certain percentage of growth in the community.

That would allow for space planning. Even if no new schools are opened, they can figure out ways to get everyone into the schools.
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  amother  


 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 8:58 am
Where is the bus strike?
“Acheinu kol beis yisroel…” We are all brothers. Regardless of background, affiliation or apparel, all us Jews are related and lives intertwined by our ancestry, going back to Avram Aveinu. When a segment of klal yisroel faces a challenge, our instinct reaction is to join as one and do anything in our power to help. Usually. Hopefully. Or do we really? What if there’s nothing in it for us; we have no apparent gain in helping a brother that doesn’t look just like us, keep up with our religious or materialistic standards? Or what if we actually derive no obvious benefit from joining together to advocate for an often forgotten brother?
When it became known in Lakewood that there would be cutbacks on the bussing for the coming school year, our community was in an uproar. We pay taxes, this is our right and more importantly, it will tremendously hinder MY life. I will be stuck in traffic, I will have to pay, I will suffer the consequences. Our community leaders immediately recognize this as a problem, as they too would be affected. A drill aka strike was implemented, and much effort went into affect to ensure its success. Children came home with notes detailing the specifications; multiple voicemails were out to all homes of the Lakewood community. The achdus and power of community were on. The feeling of security in knowing the power of our joint efforts could make a difference buoyed the energy of making the drill happen. As we sat in traffic together there was a feeling of camaraderie, together we can implement change. Because this effects me. Or so the big bosses felt. Bus strike they said, bus strike we did. And like to think we were united for a very important cause. Bussing for our children is the largest issue we could be facing as a community. Because that’s what we were told.
There currently is a problem of close to a hundred children not in school for the coming school year, which starts in a few days. The silence echoes. Our answering machines are blank, there is no drill, no community unity. There is a vast nothingness with an underlying slant of blaming those not in school for putting themselves in that awful situation.
I didn't have time to finish writing this. Lakewood folks, help me out….This is in line with the poster who wrote about our town being controlled by evil people...I started writing this a while ago, never got to complete it...
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  amother  


 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 9:18 am
Learning people don't get priority it's only the line the school gives to the working people that they dont want to accept. If u look at who gets in right away it's 50/50 learning and working.

The rabbonim knows there is a problem and they are doing nothing to prevent it from happening year to year. Why are we not working on the issue to prevent it from happening in two years or three years? Why don't te rabbonim care?

I went through this two years ago and my husband who is learning in bmg and is still learning there went to speak to rabbi mattisyahu Solomon the masgiach of Lakewood who is there to take care of Lakewood problems he answered my husband I don't have time for this now I have to give a speech in Monsey in a few hours and I have to leave. The masgiach of Lakewood should make Lakewood issues a priority and not go speaking elsewhere. I lost my respect there and two years later this still hurts me.
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  Notsobusy  




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 9:21 am
amother wrote:
I am the mother that started this post. My daughter is still not in school but I feel like we are being ignored. We are not getting yelled at or reprimanded, rather we are not getting information and have not been contacted by the vaad even though we informed them Shavuos time that we were without a school. How did the 20+ parents that are sending to the new school hear about it? Did the vaad reach out to you about it?

I feel so sorry for you. I think you have to just keep calling and calling the vaad and the schools. I know people who have done that and eventually it works. It's horrible to be that pain in the neck person who doesn't stop calling but at this point I don't know if you have a choice anymore.
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  amother  


 

Post Fri, Aug 22 2014, 9:22 am
amother wrote:
Learning people don't get priority it's only the line the school gives to the working people that they dont want to accept. If u look at who gets in right away it's 50/50 learning and working.

The rabbonim knows there is a problem and they are doing nothing to prevent it from happening year to year. Why are we not working on the issue to prevent it from happening in two years or three years? Why don't te rabbonim care?

I went through this two years ago and my husband who is learning in bmg and is still learning there went to speak to rabbi mattisyahu Solomon the masgiach of Lakewood who is there to take care of Lakewood problems he answered my husband I don't have time for this now I have to give a speech in Monsey in a few hours and I have to leave. The masgiach of Lakewood should make Lakewood issues a priority and not go speaking elsewhere. I lost my respect there and two years later this still hurts me.


Did he very back to your husband later? It is not fair to ask him to hold up a scheduled speech or go unprepared. That is a very unfair demand on anyone's time. Perhaps he gets support in Monsey. Maybe he just told you be was speaking but had a personal crisis he was dealing with.
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