Rude questions about my thin children

amother

Sun, Apr 09 2006, 7:37 am

my children are naturally thin!

once in awhile a friend would ask in a sarcastic way DO YOU FEED THEM?

what should I say >?????

BlumaG

Sun, Apr 09 2006, 4:10 pm

I ahve the opposite my toddleri s thinning out now but shes pretty big for her age but at one point when ppl commented on how BIG she was "what are u feeding her?" made me feel bad

Tefila

Sun, Apr 09 2006, 7:24 pm

Quote:

Look them in the eye and say, "Who has time for that?!"

But really some people r stttrrrange or rather rude to ask a question like that
Exploding anger

mali ↓

Sun, Apr 09 2006, 7:37 pm

people can be very rude, and you sometimes have to remind them to mind their own business. the best way to deal with it, I think, is answering sarcastically.
for example, my 1 yr. old nephew once fell and bruised himself really badly. he was black and blue all over. when my brother brought him to his babysitter the next day, she said "oh my, what did you do to him?" to which my brother answered, "oh that? he misbehaved, so I beat him up!"
another time, he was walking in the rain while talking on his celphone, with three of his kids trotting behind. a passerby screamed at him, "look at them! that's what you have kids for?" (they were, btw, having a great time) so he answered him, "ah - these? don't worry about them. there are ten more at home!"
unfortunately, some people will never get the message otherwise.

↑ happymom

Sun, Apr 09 2006, 7:59 pm

Quote:

"oh that? he misbehaved, so I beat him up!"

sometimes sarcasm can work, but for these things it might not be such a good idea. u never know, someone can take a comment like that very seriously....

↑ mali

Sun, Apr 09 2006, 8:05 pm

happymom wrote:

sometimes sarcasm can work, but for these things it might not be such a good idea. u never know, someone can take a comment like that very seriously....

true

gryp

Mon, Apr 10 2006, 1:39 pm

Quote:

once in awhile a friend would ask in a sarcastic way DO YOU FEED THEM?
what should I say >?????

I would say: no, theyre old enough to feed themselves. Rolling Eyes

ektsm

Sat, Apr 22 2006, 6:17 pm

Just smile and don't say anything. That's really not an appropriate question for people to ask. If Chas V'shalom you had mental issues and weren't the best thing for them to do would be to consult a rav close to you. But you ask such questions.

chocolate moose

Sat, Apr 22 2006, 6:24 pm

dh is thin, I was thin, and dd is VERY thin; I am always asked if she's anorexic and to have her checked. some of the kids make fun of her too, it's very hard.

chen

Tue, Apr 25 2006, 8:52 am

happymom wrote:

Quote:

"oh that? he misbehaved, so I beat him up!"

sometimes sarcasm can work, but for these things it might not be such a good idea. u never know, someone can take a comment like that very seriously....

and there are no emoticons in face-to-face conversation, LOL! But I have had that experience. Rather than hit people over the head with a broadly comic style, I usually deliver my verbal humor in extremely dry tones. As satire goes right over some people's heads, the Lemuel Gullibles of this world have taken me to task more than once for my "inappropriate" attitudes -- though I think that by now all the neighbors know not to take me seriously when I claim, straight-faced, that my children do thus-and-so because I beat them regularly. Rolling Eyes

square_peg

Wed, Apr 26 2006, 9:28 pm

There's a joke.
A woman bought a parrot. She goes to the petstore and tells the storekeeper that teh parrot seems very unhappy, so they recommend she buys a rock for the cage. She comes back tha the parrot is still unhappy, so they recommend a ladder for th eparrot to climb. She still comes back, the parrot is still unhappy, they recommend she buys a bell, for the parrot to get to after climbing the ladder.

she comes back, and they ask "hows the parrot?", The parrot died. So the storekeeper asked "Did the parrot say something before it died", "Yes, don't they sell any food in that pet store?"

supermommy

Thu, Apr 27 2006, 10:36 am

such comments are not only rude to parents but hurtful to children. I was always extremely thin and ever since I can remember people would poke fun at me calling me a toothpick and yelling at me that I should stop eating like a bird. It seems like people think that only someone who is fat shouldn't be made fun of cuz they'll be insulted but maybe they don't realize that thin people have feelings too esp. young children. I hope these comments weren't said in front of your children. And if they were you should stick up for them or at least talk to them about it afterwards to reverse the damage.

ButterflyGarden

Wed, May 10 2006, 10:24 am

I get that question all the time!! My daughter is small. She was born less than 3 kilos and she's now 8 months old and just breached 6 kilos. She eats ALL THE TIME!! But whenever we go out, someone, usually a stranger, asks me that question. I just tell them yes and she comes from small parents. I've thought about the sarcastic things I could say, but I just remind myself that the question is coming from a place of concern and love. It's usually not so easy to see that when your on a crowded bus with a screaming baby and a nosey seatmate, but I smile and change the conversation to how she's been crawling for almost a month.

ny_ima

Sat, May 13 2006, 9:01 pm

u got so many great answers...

another A: "are you sure you have time?(for the full feeding listing...)

just don't forget the MAIN ISSUE here; to keep on telling your awesome skinnies how beautiful and lean they are built and how many ppl have to diet lives to be that slim....everything to give them a positive self image! as long as they love themselves skinny, they'll be fine, which is the only thing that matters in this situation. "but words can never hurt me..." counter the rude remarks by complementing ones.

but really, so what if they say; do u feed them? of course it is not meant literally, probably just an insensitive slip of the tongue or just curious what they should eat to be that thin too!

raizy

Mon, Jun 05 2006, 6:57 pm

alright I am on the other side of the fence. my 6.5 yr old is very tall and broad and chubby. he is wearing size 14 clothes. so pple naturally tell me . he is acting immature. which he is not . he is acting like any 6 yrs old child acts. also they tell me to put him on a diet. now he does not overeat. he its a normal portien of food. yes his diet can be better. but he does not eat a whole day. only 3 meals plus one or two snacks.