Avoiding phone calls

amother

OP ↓

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:16 pm

Is that mean in your opinion? When someone is calling you to discuss something you don't want to speak about at the moment. You know why they're calling. You heard their voicemail/ saw a text message from them but either 1. You don't have an answer to give them or 2. You don't want to be bothered.
People call me at the worst time like when eating supper or kids coming home. Even once everyone is asleep, why do I have to respond to someone who is a pest?
Pls tell me I'm not the only one

amother

Bisque ↓

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:19 pm

I hate the phone. I only answer when I’m up for it. The whole world knows they can reach me easily by text should they decide to discuss things quicker.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:20 pm

I guess it's more awkward when I avoid people and they leave me several voicemails... it gets way more awkward then

amother

↑ Snow ↓

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:21 pm

amother OP wrote:

I guess it's more awkward when I avoid people and they leave me several voicemails... it gets way more awkward then

I never listen to them so my mailbox filled up. Problem solved.

amother

↑ Bisque

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:21 pm

amother OP wrote:

I guess it's more awkward when I avoid people and they leave me several voicemails... it gets way more awkward then

They are being too pushy. It’s not on you.

amother

↑ OP

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:24 pm

amother Snow wrote:

I never listen to them so my mailbox filled up. Problem solved.

I can't use the mailbox is full excuse since they were able to leave a message

amother

↑ Snow ↓

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:39 pm

amother OP wrote:

I can't use the mailbox is full excuse since they were able to leave a message

Leave yourself 20 voicemails until your mailbox fills up. Everyone I know does this.

amother

Pansy

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:40 pm

I took hate the phone. I'm usually overstimulated during the day and the precious few hours I have once everyone's asleep is mine to unwind and think.

Just one thing, while it's true that you don't owe pushy people anything, sometimes they become a nuisance/you come across as rude. Perhaps it would be best to pick up the phone, keep the convo short and make it clear you'll get back to them when you're able, no need for them to keep calling?

amother

Amethyst

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:45 pm

I just send a text message saying “I can’t talk now sorry but send me a message if there’s something I can help with”.

amother

Whitewash ↓

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:50 pm

I have a relative who for some reason thinks it makes her superior (frummer) to call, instead of texting. It drives me nuts. Like I’ll send a group text to my family asking if everyone wants to chip in for a gift. She’ll call in response. And always at a crazy time like 10:30 at night. I just ignore. It’s 2024. You’re not a better person because you don’t text. You’re just annoying. Ugh. I feel you OP.

amother

Poppy

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:52 pm

amother Bisque wrote:

I hate the phone. I only answer when I’m up for it. The whole world knows they can reach me easily by text should they decide to discuss things quicker.

Same. always thought I was the only one.

amother

↑ Snow

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:54 pm

amother Whitewash wrote:

I have a relative who for some reason think it makes her superior (frummer) to call, instead of texting. It drives me nuts. Like I’ll send a group text to my family asking if everyone wants to chip in for a gift. She’ll call in response. And always at a crazy time like 10:30 at night. I just ignore. It’s 2024. You’re not a better person because you don’t text. You’re just annoying. Ugh. I feel you OP.

Maybe she’s really lonely inside and is desperate for a few minutes of your company. I’m not saying you have to talk to her, but sometimes it helps to look at things in a different way.

amother

↑ Whitewash

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 8:55 pm

amother Snow wrote:

Maybe she’s really lonely inside and is desperate for a few minutes of your company. I’m not saying you have to talk to her, but sometimes it helps to look at things in a different way.

Interesting perspective!

amother

Bubblegum

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 9:57 pm

You don’t have to answer the phone or the door for anyone. Sometimes, I put my phone away for the whole day.

amother

Crystal

Mon, Sep 09 2024, 10:00 pm

I text them “Sorry I cannot talk on the phone, txting is easiest for me. How can I help you?

If it’s someone awaiting your response on something you previously discussed, just text “Hi, I saw your call but do not have an answer for you yet. I will reach out once I do, thanks

NotFunny

Tue, Sep 10 2024, 12:31 am

It’s not always about being holy… I prefer a 3 second phone call to a 10+ back n forth text convo on a silly technical thing that can more easily be discussed via phone.
Don’t get me wrong, I love texting for many other purposes and do that too, but yes, even in 2024 phone calls have their time and place.

(In response to whitewash)

Success10

Tue, Sep 10 2024, 1:11 am

I think it's appropriate to at least drop a note saying you saw their message and you'll get back to them as soon as you can.

imaima ↓

Tue, Sep 10 2024, 1:31 am

amother OP wrote:

Respond to the message?

You posted it in Manners and Etiquette
In terms of manners and etiquette you are wrong. Give the person some kind of a feedback, especially if you are connected through work obligations

↑ imaima

Tue, Sep 10 2024, 1:32 am

amother OP wrote:

I guess it's more awkward when I avoid people and they leave me several voicemails... it gets way more awkward then

Yea but you take it that far