At loss what to do mesivta for 15 yr old son

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Our Challenging Children (gifted, ADHD, sensitive, defiant)

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amother

OP ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 5:32 pm

I know it is very very late.
My son is supposed to go into 10 grade.
He had a small yeshiva last year catering to boys with adhd and asd and weak boys.
He hated it and refuses to go back. I applied to another yeshiva and they took a Ling time getting back to me and just heard from them yesterday.
This yeshiva is where a lot of his friends are in. I was reluctant because it isn't a high academic yeshiva but it's still mainstream and I don't think he will be able to sit.
He is very behind because 8 grade was a disaster and he really never had the discipline to sit and study.
This yeshiva he wanted to go to said they would take him but he needs to go into 9.
He refuses because his friends will be in 10 and one boy he knows that will be in 9 is 2 yrs younger than him.
I am so stuck I have no clue who to ask at this point a couple days before yeshiva starts.

Any advice. I am so stuck.

amother

Starflower

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 5:56 pm

I'm so, so sorry that you are going through this. DS just got into a yeshiva a week ago. He's still not enthusiastic about going but I'm hoping he'll make it.

Have you brought up this concern to the hanhala? They should understand the social challenge of your friends being a class above you. Can you offer a tutor to help him?

amother

Apple ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 6:06 pm

OP, where are you located?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 6:27 pm

amother Apple wrote:

OP, where are you located?

Monsey

amother

↑ Apple

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 7:05 pm

what about shaarei arazim

amother

DarkKhaki

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 7:11 pm

My son had to stay back a year cause he came from out of town and he is very very smart so it was really hard for him. He went from being the top to staying back a grade. He worked really hard and then he was able to go into the right grade. Speak to the Yeshiva and ask them if he works hard and shows he is capable will they let him move to the right grade. That will hopefully motivate. I really think the Yeshiva is doing the right thing - they are giving him a chance to succeed. He should be old enough to understand and go for it.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 9:29 pm

Starflower I spoke to them and they understand my concern about him being in a lower class than his friends he was with since elementary but they dont want a boy disturbing the class which I am afraid he will.
. Maybe a tutor will help

apple, he doesnt want shaarei arazim because he feels its too yeshivish for him even though thats who we are but he isnt.

darkkahki, problem is he wouldnt mind repeating 9 grade but not in a yeshiva that he has friends in.
I told him that if he works hard and the hanhala sees he is very motivated then they might put him into 10 grade.

I am just so uptight and sick about this and dont know who to turn to for advice.

amother

Blonde

Sun, Sep 29 2024, 11:21 pm

OP was just thinking of you, did it work out in the end for your son?

amother

Grape

Sun, Sep 29 2024, 11:23 pm

I am also looking for a new mesivta for my son..

amother

NeonOrange

Sun, Sep 29 2024, 11:39 pm

What about the new mesivta in Waterbury - not rabbi kalisch - has a 9th and a 10th - totally. For boys with Asd and ADHD

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Sep 30 2024, 9:25 am

amother Blonde wrote:

OP was just thinking of you, did it work out in the end for your son?

Thank you so much for thinking of me it means a lot to me.
My son is in a yeshiva that I hope will be ok.
We were thinking about this yeshiva last year for him but I didn't think he would be able to handle it. Now he is there but in 9 not 10 grade with his friends.
I was hesitant to send there because it's a drop to the left for us but that's where he wanted to go.
I just hope it all works out.

amother

↑ OP

Mon, Sep 30 2024, 9:27 am

amother NeonOrange wrote:

What about the new mesivta in Waterbury - not rabbi kalisch - has a 9th and a 10th - totally. For boys with Asd and ADHD

Which one are you referring to? In Waterbury or close by?
I only know of Rabbi Martin new yeshiva there but not necessarily for adhd boys.

amother

Pear

Mon, Sep 30 2024, 9:30 am

Szendro has a yeshiva in Lakewood for asd adhd kids.

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