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Forum
-> Judaism
-> Halachic Questions and Discussions
imamommy5
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 Fri, Jun 07 2024, 1:37 pm
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Brother-in-laws playing with sister in-laws
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preciousmommy
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 1:40 pm
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I personally wouldn’t. It’s not that tznius to have men watching you bowl.
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GoldFlowers
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 1:42 pm
Depends your general hashkafa (sp?) and relationship. Most of my family wouldn’t do it, everyone in my in-law’s family would.
I personally wouldn’t have a problem with it.
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Busybee5
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 1:54 pm
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We do it occasionally. Jpf. Litvish
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Blessing1
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 5:31 pm
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I would not. A brother in law/sister in law is halachically no different than any random person.
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agreer
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 5:36 pm
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People go bowling on dates...
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chocolover
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 6:19 pm
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We’ve done it as a family but then men and ladies each had their own lane
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BatyaEsther
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 6:42 pm
| chocolover wrote: | | We’ve done it as a family but then men and ladies each had their own lane |
Just curious how different lanes differ from sharing a lane and each person having their own turn.
If the concern is tznius and seeing a woman’s form when she bowls, being one lane over doesn’t solve anything. If it is laughing, interacting, and playing together in general, then family Purim seudahs might be the same issue.
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Amarante
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 6:50 pm
Please explain the issue because unless you never bowl at all, random men will see you bowl.
I literally have never thought of bowing as being in any way e*rotic
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Blessing1
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 6:52 pm
| Amarante wrote: | Please explain the issue because unless you never bowl at all, random men will see you bowl.
I literally have never thought of bowing as being in any way e*rotic |
For me the issue is not about other men seeing me bowl. It's about hanging out, playing, laughing, having fun together with a random man. (My BIL)
Would you feel comfortable with your son or husband going bowling with random women? This is no different.
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nightingale1
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 6:53 pm
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I’ve done it me, DH, and all his brothers but refused to do it on a date. I felt better having my husband there. I also made sure to stand in an tznius stance even if it affected by bowling.
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chocolover
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 6:55 pm
| BatyaEsther wrote: | Just curious how different lanes differ from sharing a lane and each person having their own turn.
If the concern is tznius and seeing a woman’s form when she bowls, being one lane over doesn’t solve anything. If it is laughing, interacting, and playing together in general, then family Purim seudahs might be the same issue. |
It’s less camaraderie with each other and then sils and bils not competing directly with each other
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Amarante
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 6:57 pm
| Blessing1 wrote: | For me the issue is not about other men seeing me bowl. It's about hanging out, playing, laughing, having fun together with a random man. (My BIL)
Would you feel comfortable with your son or husband going bowling with random women? This is no different. |
This is a group family activity. Presumably the spouses are there as well so it isn't some clandestine meeting with a random group of women like going out to dinner with unrelated female co-workers without spouses.
Everyone's spouse is there - children might also be there since bowling is generally viewed as family friendly.
Do you never have your BIL/SIL or other family members together where they might socialize.
I would have no issues with having a group activity that included members of my family engaging in an activity - a picnic, a cookout, a party.
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Blessing1
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 7:02 pm
| Amarante wrote: | This is a group family activity. Presumably the spouses are there as well so it isn't some clandestine meeting with a random group of women like going out to dinner with unrelated female co-workers without spouses.
Everyone's spouse is there - children might also be there since bowling is generally viewed as family friendly.
Do you never have your BIL/SIL or other family members together where they might socialize.
I would have no issues with having a group activity that included members of my family engaging in an activity - a picnic, a cookout, a party. |
This is where everyone asking a sheila for themselves comes in.
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ProudJew
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Fri, Jun 07 2024, 7:06 pm
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I really don’t see the issue. You’re all family. You’re in laws are not random strangers. It’s like any other family get together except it’s not at home.
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DrMom
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Sat, Jun 08 2024, 4:19 pm
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Seems live the most parve activity I can think of other than sitting around and just eating.
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BatyaEsther
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Sat, Jun 08 2024, 10:09 pm
| DrMom wrote: | | Seems live the most parve activity I can think of other than sitting around and just eating. |
Eating is so rarely pareve. It’s usually either meat or dairy. 🤣🤣
Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.
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