Ring for Daughter in Law

amother

Hydrangea ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 6:25 am

A CZ is not strong like a diamond and has zero value. Lab grown diamonds have gone up in price and really have practically no resale value. Mined diamonds have a resale value. Absolutely you should tell her, and most preferably give her a choice. There really is no reason to keep this a secret.

amother

↑ Hydrangea

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 6:29 am

amother Foxglove wrote:

This is not unfortunate. It's fine. Most people don't sell their stones anyways. Even as a yerusha it's usually not sold.
Same chemical makeup...
BH they get larger and save some money!

OP you do have to tell your DIL

I think the real question is -do you really want to invest all that money, and yes you are still investing a lot for a lab diamond, for something that has no resale value?

amother

↑ Lotus ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 6:40 am

amother NeonPurple wrote:

Where can you get a beautiful lab for $350? I've looking into lab grown and believe you can't find a solitaire 1 caret diamond for $350. Neither can you find a 2 caret eternity band for $700 nor a 3 caret one for $1050.

(At the end we bought a smaller diamond eternity band, due to quality).

There's a subreddit called lab diamond where people discuss all kinds of vendors.

I buy from Mrs. Neustadt 9175891845 or Luvansh.com.

There's lots of places with reasonable prices. Here is a fully set 1 caret for $800 including the band

https://www.superjeweler.com/l......html

Here's a $300 lab necklace 1 caret

https://www.superjeweler.com/l......html

amother

Cappuccino ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 7:09 am

Just saying and I hope this doesn't happen to anyone, but I know someone that had to sell her diamond because they needed money.
I honestly don't know the resale value of diamonds now, I can't imagine it was what it used to be. But don't you want something that holds value?
And yes, I would feel sooo "cheated" if I got a lab grown diamond and wasn't told.
And it became the norm to ask the kallah what she prefers, larger lab or smaller mined diamond.
I think OP doesn't understand what a lab grown diamond is if she is "comparing" it to a CZ. But regardless, you would need to tell her.
And don't the chosson and kallah need to get insurance for it? It's bound to come out somwhow...

Bnei Berak 10 ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 7:15 am

Are you in Israel in chareidi circles? Or American circles?
In Israeli chareidi yeshivish circles I believe all kallot get CZ rings.
Daughter of a friend of mine didn't want CZ. She preferred one diamond ring and *no other jewelry* instead instead of a CZ rings plus necklace plus bracelet etc.
A colleague of mine got extremely upset and cried it work when she got a CZ instead of a diamond (her mother is British so I guess mother had a diamond ring as a bride in British circles at that time)
Be open with your kallah. If she absolutely wants a diamond and you cannot afford tell her your jewelry budget she will have to either add herself to payment or receive only the ring and nothing else.

↑ Bnei Berak 10 ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 7:22 am

amother Cappuccino wrote:

I totally agree kallah should *always* have a choice between small mined diamond vs larger lab grown.

↑ Bnei Berak 10 ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 7:28 am

amother OP wrote:

If I get a lab grown or CZ for a daughter in law, do I have to tell her?

Yeshivish circles

Yes you must tell her.

↑ Bnei Berak 10 ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 7:50 am

amother Darkblue wrote:

Op, if you have an unusual budget, please let dil know in advance and ask what she prefers within that budget. It might sound tacky but honestly it's better than her thinking you're dishonest.

Not tacky at all. Always best to be open and give a choice.

amother

Oxfordblue ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 8:23 am

amother NeonPurple wrote:

If you do the right homework, not online but through private party you can. I paid for setting and diamond color e vvs over 2 carat $1450. The setting was $1000 the rest was for the diamond.

imaima ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 8:25 am

amother OP wrote:

If I get a lab grown or CZ for a daughter in law, do I have to tell her?

Yeshivish circles

Lab not
Cz definitely

Cz is a slap in the face
It’s a present for a child

amother

Seashell

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 8:53 am

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

I totally agree kallah should *always* have a choice between small mined diamond vs larger lab grown.

Unless your budget only allows for a small lab diamond

amother

Tiffanyblue

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 9:40 am

I gave my dil the option between a small diamond or a larger lab grown.
She went for the lab grown.
I wouldnt of gotten one without her knowing.

amother

Tangerine

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 9:46 am

I tell people if anything I give them looks real but is fake. IOW, if it's gold filled, or gold-plated silver, or a garnet rather than a ruby (garnet being real but less valuable than a ruby) or a cz or whatever. I don't believe in deception, whether it's a birthday gift, a gift just because it's Tuesday, or an engagement ring.

amother

Gray

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 9:54 am

amother NeonPurple wrote:

yes that sounds too cheap.
I got a high quality lab grown diamond 2 carat with 50 pointer stones on each side and it was 5k I think...

amother

↑ Cappuccino ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 10:25 am

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

Not tacky at all. Always best to be open and give a choice.

Yes it's totally the norm nowadays.
(Unless the family has enough $ for a decent a size diamond regardless. )

amother

↑ Cappuccino ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 10:30 am

amother Seashell wrote:

Unless your budget only allows for a small lab diamond

But then I still think she should know.
I am wondering how to say it if you're not offering something bigger, but maybe someone here has ideas of wording it.

amother

↑ Cappuccino ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 10:32 am

And some kallas prefer smaller with a pave setting.
And just curios, as much as it's the norm, do you specify diamond size ( 1 CT vs. 1.5) or just say "bigger or smaller)

↑ Bnei Berak 10 ↓

Tue, Nov 19 2024, 10:40 am

amother Seashell wrote:

Unless your budget only allows for a small lab diamond

So much more reason to be open with her. Maybe she wants only one piece of jewelry but a good one (I have given an example before) or she may want to add payment.