Are you pretending or really enjoying?

amother

Lemonchiffon

Tue, May 28 2024, 4:31 pm

It's something I used to do but don't anymore. Now I'm old enough not to care what anyone thinks and I have no problem being honest about not being into things like everyone else. Two things off the top of my head: I hate sushi. I used to try to push myself because everyone's obsessed, always ordering sushi etc. Now I just say no thanks and if pressed I'll say I really really don't care for it. Another thing is flowers. Early in my marriage, dh bought flowers every Friday because he was told that's what wives like. I felt bad to tell him I don't like flowers. Eventually after a couple of years, I mustered up the courage to tell him actually I'm not a fan and he can stop buying them. I think he was kind of relieved. I was certainly relieved to finally to get it out there!

amother

Oatmeal

Tue, May 28 2024, 4:39 pm

People!
I'm the life of the party, you can count on me for laughs or witty remarks. I'm the perfect shmoozer, entertainer......
But all the time I just wish to be left alone, to get away from the silly gossip and small talk. I'm really not interested in hearing about your son's missing tooth or your daughter's friend's adorable baby. I don't have patience to care about your torn book or about your messy house. Instead I just sit there smiling and counting the minutes till I get to go home.

amother

Tomato

Tue, May 28 2024, 4:52 pm

amother Oatmeal wrote:

I should probably start a spinoff but would you consider yourself an introvert or extrovert?

amother

Oatmeal

Tue, May 28 2024, 4:54 pm

amother Tomato wrote:

I should probably start a spinoff but would you consider yourself an introvert or extrovert?

Both.

I thrive around people, I enjoy a good conversation and like I said, I'm usually the life of the party. What I dislike is silly and immature discussions which inevitably always happen at get togethers or parties.

I also like to spend time with myself and I enjoy my own thoughts.

I believe an extroverted introvert is what I am.

amother

Peony

Tue, May 28 2024, 4:55 pm

I pretend to enjoy being an introvert, but in reality I'd give anything to be an extrovert. I think they have a much better time in life for the most part.

amother

Blush

Tue, May 28 2024, 5:05 pm

I pretend to like certain relatives, including pretty much all of DH's family.
WHY?
What do I gain by being rude and isolating myself from them. I can suck it up to make my husband happy and give my kids access to their family.

zaq

Tue, May 28 2024, 5:21 pm

amother Lightpink wrote:

I know a family that don't pretend ever! They are brutally honest.
They tell me I gained weight
Or that I don't look good.
Or tells me bad things about my parents / siblings
Yes I'm insulted!
SO PLEASE PRETEND PPL! Yes!

That's not what OP asked. She asked specifically about pretending to enjoy things that you don't. In your case it might be pretending to enjoy this family's company when you'd be happier spending time in the venomous snake pit at the zoo.

amother

Moonstone

Wed, May 29 2024, 12:40 am

Shmoozing with my teens for hours at night. ( they can sleep late and I have to wake up early in the am)
Yom tov- when I’m working around the clock. Cooking cleaning serving etc.

amother

Canary

Wed, May 29 2024, 1:04 am

Sushi.

There’s nothing I dislike more than sticky rice that is holding together veggies that are sliced too tiny or raw or tempura fish. And I hate the sauces.

I eat it with friends because it’s cool and fun.

renslet

Wed, May 29 2024, 1:15 am

I used to go on amusement park rides because I thought that no one really enjoyed it like me but they went anyway
so I just held my breath till it was over.
Then I found out that some people really do enjoy it and so I stopped going

Cheiny

Wed, May 29 2024, 1:19 am

amother Canary wrote:

What’s cool and fun about eating something you strongly dislike?

amother

Canary

Wed, May 29 2024, 1:26 am

Cheiny wrote:

What’s cool and fun about eating something you strongly dislike?

My friends like to go out and eat sushi together. I dislike fries and salmon poppers too. There’s something fun about eating sushi with chopsticks with friends even though the taste isn’t good.

amother

Wed, May 29 2024, 1:37 am

amother Pearl wrote:

Weddings, bar mitzvahs, shul dinners, and most other parties except for very small at-home gatherings where I know and like all or almost all of the people.

Some people's sense of humor. Looking at pictures of and listening to stories about other people's vacations and grandchildren.

Why pretend? It's called having good manners. And I expect them to return the favor, laugh at my lame jokes and pretend to enjoy looking at my pictures and listening to my vacation-and-grandchildren stories.

I’m not talking about manners.. that’s being a mentsch
Like a pp said- more leaning toward social pressures. Like why can’t I just admit I don’t like alcohol??

amother

Wed, May 29 2024, 1:41 am

amother Lightpink wrote:

I answered this to different poster- I hadn’t meant the thread to come across as manners and social etiquette. Leaning towards social pressures/ norms that are not necessary

amother

Ballota

Wed, May 29 2024, 6:26 am

amother Winterberry wrote:

I never pretend anything. I only do what I enjoy. And I make changes that fit my life better.

Same B’H!

amother

Oatmeal

Wed, May 29 2024, 10:48 am

deena19k wrote:

Purim

I don't pretend I dislike it. I make sure everyone knows how it's my least favorite day of the year.