Body Jewelry | Imamother

↑ freidasima ↓

Sun, Nov 15 2009, 3:11 pm

Zus, a man wearing a shirt and pants is normative. The question is only what type and what color and what material.
A man wearing a hat is normative. Or at least in some parts of the world. The question is what type and what material etc.

Is there anything normative about piercing your belly button, your nipples, your eyebrow and your tongue?

That's where the difference begins.

↑ Zus ↓

Sun, Nov 15 2009, 3:13 pm

I just said, IMO 'non jewish custom' is not a valid argument.
Normative is for the most part defined by the non jewish world around us. Like it or not.

joy613

Sun, Nov 15 2009, 3:20 pm

Freidasima, way to go with your posts! They're exactly what I wanted to write, just written so much better than I would do, so I'm not going to bother. keep it up!!

↑ imamama ↓

Sun, Nov 15 2009, 3:40 pm

It was the norm at one point for women to have their noses pierced, Jewish or not. It was the norm at one point for men to wear fedoras, Jewish or not. Just because one is more recent than the other doesn't make it any better.

In the circles that I run in (which are probably similar to the circles Zus runs in) it is normal and acceptable and completely tzanua for a woman to have a nose ring.

BTW I am friends with a girl who had a genital piercing from back in her not frum days, and she told me she had no intention of taking it out before she got married, unless her husband was unhappy with it. She is now very charedi. Whether she still has it or not, is obviously not my business.

raspberry tea

Sun, Nov 15 2009, 5:15 pm

freidasima wrote:

I guess it just goes to show you how much even the frummest men (and women) are influenced by the non jewish influences around.

I understand it's a cultural thing but to me - as I read the other discussions here of how important tznius is, not only outside but inside, and how we must keep to yiddishe minhogim and not take on non jewish stuff, it's sad to what level the non jewish influences seem to have gone into really frum society...

I agree.

↑ Zus

Sun, Nov 15 2009, 5:21 pm

Emaleh wrote:

freidasima wrote:

I agree.

I do too, but it's nothing new. This trend didn't start with accepting body jewelry.

↑ gold21 ↓

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 12:33 am

I very much agree with freidasima. I also find it interesting that ppl say that they are super yeshivish and their husbands are super yeshivish, they were frum all their lives, etc, and yet their hubby wants a belly ring. really. a man who was super frum his whole life should not be desiring belly rings. how does he know about them? models he may have noticed in magazines and posters generally dont wear them. it is not something done in classy circles. so how do these men know about these things? clearly theres more to this picture. Zus, dont you live outside the US? im thinking that perhaps body jewelry is more accepted outside the US. because here it is not normal for a religious jewish woman to have a nose ring. probably more accepted elsewhere? also, regarding talking to friends about body waxings, it is definitely not a normal topic of conversation, but yes it has come up. also, I used to work with very interesting ppl who would discuss and share their most personal information. and I learned a lot, fortunately or uunfortunately.

↑ chavamom ↓

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 12:37 am

Wait - I hate to bring it up again....but how do "super yeshivish" guys know they want their wives to get a Brazilain? I've asked this on an old thread where people claimed it was their (chassidish or yeshivish) husbands asking them to do it....

↑ gold21 ↓

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 12:41 am

chavamom I guess you follow me around on this board. you have not responded to any other poster on this thread other than myself. how flattering! in any case, duuh I know about brazilians myself. not my husband! how do I know about these things? I read Glamour. I have read Cosmopolitan. I see the price list at the salon. k?

↑ gold21

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 12:43 am

wait now youll ask: what kind of frum person reads Cosmopolitan, right? ok I know im a bum, I guess I should give up right now and get a nose ring. hoop or stud, what do you think ill look better in?

↑ chavamom ↓

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 1:21 am

1) No, I don't follow you around on the board. I'd post my opinion about body jewlrey, but I"m afraid freidasima would think I'm following HER around... 2) I said *the husbands* get the idea. And it's actually a comment from an old thread that you didn't even participate in (I can go find it, but someone did a very funny spoof of husbands schmoozing about Brazilians at the mikvah).

I certainly am aware that there are frum women who read Cosmo and Glamour. Yeah, we have them at work and I will put it out there that I think they are, if not lower class than a belly ring, at least on par. But you seem to realize that.

Seraph ↓

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 1:23 am

amother wrote:

Question for all those with Belly rings - What is your background and what type of community do you live in?

I live in a typical frum community - one that you might describe as yeshivish. Went to a very frum Bais Yaakov and grew up in a typical frum home. As I've said in earlier posts you would never know that I had one by looking at me or how I dress. My husband happens to find belly rings attractive (and yes he went to mainstream yeshivas and also grew up in a very frum home, wears a black hat, goes to daven, learns etc..) so I decided to get one. Its something only he and I know about. It has nothing to do with my community or background.

I'm assuming you either wear very loose shirts or don't wear belly rings most of the time, because more often than not, belly rings show through shirts.

↑ chavamom ↓

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 1:24 am

gold21 wrote:

you have not responded to any other poster on this thread other than myself.

BTW - you are wrong. I posted on page 2 Wink

↑ Seraph

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 1:51 am

I have gotten a total of 3 pierces in my life. One in each ear at first. Then I got one more piercing in one ear. Having small hoops in both ears and then one stud in on ear can look very classy and elegant, and was accepted in my very frum dati leumi seminary.
I took out that third piercing when I became chareidi because its not accepted in chareidi society and the hole is now closed.
I think more than 2 pierces per ear is already losing its classiness.

I think nose studs can be beautiful. Tiny ones. If they were accepted in my community, perhaps I would get one, but they are not accepted. Hoops in the nose gross me out and remind me too much of this:

As for belly piercings. I think they can be beautiful if you have the right body. I always wanted to get one, but said "after I lose weight" because I didnt want to pierce my belly when I was a little chubby. Then I said "after I get married if my husband likes it". And then the stretch marks came. My tummy truly looks gross now and I don't want to call any attention to it, so belly piercings are no longer in the picture at all.
But they really are beautiful. Look at this and tell me its ugly and crass. I dare you.

Hidden:

When I think of what is classy and what is crass, I try to think about job interviews in respectable places, or even imagine a business executive. I can not imagine a business executive of a fortune 500 company with an eyebrow pierce, a lip pierce, a cartilage pierce, a tongue pierce, a nose ring hoop, etc. And I assume that any of the aforementioned would be a strike against you in a job interview unless it was a place catering to teens or punks.
But I can definitely see a fortune 500 executive with a second peircing (diamond studs) in each ear, with the first piercing being hoops.
As for belly rings, no one would see that so its a private thing and would have no issue with it and can see a fortune 500 business exec with a belly ring.
Cant see any male business execs with any piercings though.

However, I wouldn't call any of it disgusting unless its truly overblown. When I was in early labor, I was walking about the hospital lobby and I saw a lady there. To pass the time, I started counting her piercings. I think I must have reached at least 50. She had multiple eyebrow pierces, a tongue pierce, a lip and cheek pierce, nose rings, at least 10 hoops in each ear, and 10s of surface skin pierces up and down her arms, cleavage, neck, etc.

Hidden:

I was truly grossed out, and I dont think anyone would get offended if I say such piercings, the excessiveness, is truly disgusting. I think such piercings distract people from what you're trying to say, and make it hard for people to take you seriously. Excessive piercings, though, not fewer peircings, even if I wouldnt do them myself.

↑ chavamom ↓

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 2:01 am

Now *this*

Hidden:

is "low class" LOL

Seriously, there is a woman who works at Trader Joes who seems to be really sweet. She has the most hideous tattoos and piercings I can hardly stand to look at her. She seriously has her eyes tattooed to look like she's got black eyes and big, violent tattoos on her arms. I can't figure stuff like that out for the life of me.

Last edited by chavamom on Mon, Nov 16 2009, 2:07 am; edited 1 time in total

↑ slushiemom

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 2:07 am

what the heck is wrong with people?!?!?

↑ chavamom ↓

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 2:12 am

slushiemom wrote:

what the heck is wrong with people?!?!?

As best I can figure, some people have a mutilation fixation. Or they see extensive tattoos and piercings as something akin to an extreme sport.

↑ imamama

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 2:37 am

Oooohhh! Why did I click on that hidden content button???? Why, oh why???? Puke

↑ freidasima

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 5:31 am

I'm as modern as they go when it comes to my reading habits, I have in my day read (and very much outgrown I guess) cosmo and glamour and all the rest, but I'm more of the generation of "ladies home journal" "family circle" and "women's day" these days. I like to see high fashion in Vogue sometimes and my kids came back from a visit to wherever and brought me Prima and Self and those were great magazines as well, and clean.

So, here's my take. I have NEVER seen a woman with more than one earring in each ear in:
Ladies home journal
Family Circle
Women's day
Self
Prima
Zest
Esssentials
Good Homes
Women's World
O (the Oprah - who my mother insists on calling Ofra and thinks she is a falashmura) magazine

I HAVE seen all sorts of what I consider to be weird piercings in:
Elle
Glamour
Cosmopolitan
People
Sixteen
Seventeen (or the equivalent)

So where does this leave us.
It seems to be what my generation called a "teeny bopper" thing, meaning for the very young and more as a lark. Orif you are older, for a very specific type of society which, once again, I don't see (from my advanced age) as being "normative" even in upper middle class non-Jewish soceity.

Yeah well, as you get older the "larkiness" doesn't seem so cute I guess.

Temilia

Mon, Nov 16 2009, 9:42 am

Quote:

O (the Oprah - who my mother insists on calling Ofra and thinks she is a falashmura) magazine

FS< for some reason I just found this hilarious. Maybe because I can imagine my mother, or my grandmother doing something similar.