I want to throw away my childhood diary

amother

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 12:50 pm

I kept a diary from age 14-21. I never read it and would be horrified if someone found it and read it.
I started thinking that I want to throw it away. I wasn’t abused or anything, I’m a BT and just don’t like what’s in there.
What would you do?

amother

Tomato ↓

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 1:26 pm

Shred it first before you toss it. It served its purpose at the time, no need to hang on to it just because. I shredded my second one, from when I was in my 20s, before my oldest learned how to read. My first, from about 4th grade, got shredded long before that. It was sheer boredom, anyway: "Got an 86 in arithmetic. Went to Rivka after school. Got new knee socks." The one from my 20s was different, of course, and I didn't want anyone getting ahold of it, ever.

I often wonder how long-deceased people feel about the public reading their diaries and correspondence. Doing so feels like a major invasion, even though it can be a fascinating glimpse into the past. I find myself mentally apologizing to the diarist for the intrusion.

amother

↑ Pewter ↓

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 1:28 pm

amother Tomato wrote:

I hear what you're saying. I happen to think my diaries are fascinating. I have mixed feelings about the thought of it being published after I die. Not that's going to happen but it's kind of cool in a way. I wouldn't be around to be embarrassed.

amother

Yarrow

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 1:28 pm

amother Pewter wrote:

I would never ever throw out my diary. At least not till I'm old enough and I'm worried about my children getting a hold of it after I die.

My mother told someone to get rid of her diary when she dies. By the time we got to it the pages were gone. No idea who tossed it. I would’ve loved a window into her mind but maybe it’s for the best. I got rid of a lot of painful writings years ago. I found it cathartic.

amother

Tealblue

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 2:32 pm

I would throw it out before rereading.
I had a journal when I was 19. I threw it out. It was connected with too much discomfort and not enough joy to warrant saving it. I never wanted anyone to see it.
I am ready to enter the process of parting with cards and letters I have

amother

Garnet

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 2:38 pm

I would’ve paid any price to read a diary of my great grandparents, especially the ones who lived through the war.

I’m saving mine for my grandchildren. I’d love for them to know where they’re coming from, why their life may have turned out how it did, and how things felt like in the years that have gone.

During my lifetime? Nopes. I will never read them again.

loveJudaism

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 2:45 pm

amother OP wrote:

If I were you id keep it, I’m a BT too and have dairies/notebooks of my younger years. Sure it’s a bit embarrassing and cringe but this is who I was and its nice to know and remember the growth of a person.

Again up to you but id think you’d regret it, unless you’ve written horrible things about close people, then id just rip or cross our certain bits, after all you put effort into that dairy, it held your thoughts and emotions, I find it precious.

familyfirst

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 5:49 pm

Dump it
If it will not make your children look at you in a positive light, there is no gain.

It wasn’t a waste of time. It helped you process and become the person you are now. It served its purpose. Time to move on

amother

Lily

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 5:53 pm

Journaling is to dump your thoughts onto a page. There’s very little purpose in rereading them.
I tossed all of mine and stopped writing when my mom told me she was reading them behind my back.

amother

Maroon

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 7:05 pm

My kids are always asking me to tell them stories of when I was younger. In your situation, I would read through it, rewrite some cute interesting stories that my kids would enjoy hearing and the rest get rid of.

amother

↑ Pewter

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 7:07 pm

amother Pewter wrote:

On second thought, I'm really liking this idea. Who wants the rights to publish my diaries after I die?

I've had a pretty interesting life and I'm a deep and introspective person. I think they'll be fun to read.

amother

Seashell

Mon, Jan 13 2025, 7:50 pm

This is so interesting that most people want to chuck their diaries. I reread my diaries from my teen years and it allows me to see the growth I've had since then or even things I still am struggling with but maybe have a different perspective on

amother

↑ Tomato

Yesterday at 5:48 am

The only diary I kept was the journal of the time I spent volunteering on a kibbutz in the months after the YK war. It was a log of events, sights, and impressions as opposed to a chronicle of crushes, jealousies and broygezes.Maybe it'll be of interest to someone after 120.

amother

Cinnamon

Yesterday at 6:03 am

My diary was do depressing, and full of teenage hormones ( ex they were so mean to me, wish I could run away) which after retrospect after my teens, made me realize I was a pack of raging hormones which made me moody and depressed. Threw mine out when my kids were old enough to find it, cuz I dont need anyone seeing the depressed me ( especially not to find after 120, and see me in a negative light) bh that teenage depression and irregular hormones are not me anymore