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Forum
-> Household Management
-> Finances
amother
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Today at 4:54 pm
We pay approximately 50% of our tuition bill in tuition. For reference, we pay about 10,000 per child instead of 19,000.
We are broke and living paycheck to paycheck. We can barely afford the tuition we are paying.
My parents called. They live out of my area. They would like to pay for us to build a new kitchen and a bedroom as well so they can feel like there is space to come visit.
I would love this opportunity. My house is small and tight. This would be a total game changer.
But im concerned about how this will impact on our tuition discount. It would look bad to do a 200,000 dollar renovation and if it was my money I would never.
Before you ask. My parents will not pay tuition. They have offered a little bit here and there. If we say no to the construction, the money would not be given to us to use for other purposes.
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amother
Oxfordblue
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Today at 4:56 pm
amother OP wrote: | We pay approximately 50% of our tuition bill in tuition. For reference, we pay about 10,000 per child instead of 19,000.
We are broke and living paycheck to paycheck. We can barely afford the tuition we are paying.
My parents called. They live out of my area. They would like to pay for us to build a new kitchen and a bedroom as well so they can feel like there is space to come visit.
I would love this opportunity. My house is small and tight. This would be a total game changer.
But im concerned about how this will impact on our tuition discount. It would look bad to do a 200,000 dollar renovation and if it was my money I would never.
Before you ask. My parents will not pay tuition. They have offered a little bit here and there. If we say no to the construction, the money would not be given to us to use for other purposes. |
Take the opportunity!
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amother
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Today at 4:57 pm
If it’s a gift, then I would. Why should you suffer and reject gifts just because you personally can’t afford something?
I would tell the school beforehand so they don’t misunderstand the situation
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Molly Weasley
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Today at 4:58 pm
amother OP wrote: | We pay approximately 50% of our tuition bill in tuition. For reference, we pay about 10,000 per child instead of 19,000.
We are broke and living paycheck to paycheck. We can barely afford the tuition we are paying.
My parents called. They live out of my area. They would like to pay for us to build a new kitchen and a bedroom as well so they can feel like there is space to come visit.
I would love this opportunity. My house is small and tight. This would be a total game changer.
But im concerned about how this will impact on our tuition discount. It would look bad to do a 200,000 dollar renovation and if it was my money I would never.
Before you ask. My parents will not pay tuition. They have offered a little bit here and there. If we say no to the construction, the money would not be given to us to use for other purposes. |
Go for it. What's the issue?
You can't really use this as income; you can't just take $200,000 and pay for school with it. You can't sell the kitchen either - it's either you use it or you lose it...
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amother
Lightcyan
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Today at 5:00 pm
What a lovely gift!
An opportunity from Hashem!
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Molly Weasley
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Today at 5:03 pm
amother Tealblue wrote: | If it’s a gift, then I would. Why should you suffer and reject gifts just because you personally can’t afford something?
I would tell the school beforehand so they don’t misunderstand the situation |
I don't think it's the school's business to know.
You're being fully honest with them - your income is what it is. You don't have any other assets that you're not declaring. They know you own a home; the renovations you are doing to your home with someone else's money for their own comfort are irrelevant to them.
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amother
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Today at 5:05 pm
It's just that on the tuition grant form, they ask about recent construction. I wouldn't know how to fill it out without seemingly like we paid. I feel uncomfortable being poor with a huge kitchen lol.
Thanks for the advice. Sounds like we should jump on it!
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amother
Raspberry
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Today at 5:13 pm
But you are not paying for the construction so I would think you don't need to put it on the tuition form...
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amother
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Today at 5:18 pm
Molly Weasley wrote: | I don't think it's the school's business to know.
You're being fully honest with them - your income is what it is. You don't have any other assets that you're not declaring. They know you own a home; the renovations you are doing to your home with someone else's money for their own comfort are irrelevant to them. |
I disagree, because they are on a tuition discount. The school is allowing them to only pay 50% of the tuition under the assumption there aren’t extra funds available. It is definitely their business to know
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amother
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Today at 5:20 pm
amother OP wrote: | It's just that on the tuition grant form, they ask about recent construction. I wouldn't know how to fill it out without seemingly like we paid. I feel uncomfortable being poor with a huge kitchen lol.
Thanks for the advice. Sounds like we should jump on it! |
On the form write in the renovation and in parentheses write fully paid by parents
Especially since they ask specifically, you have to say something. But it’s very easy to explain, and it looks worse if you hide it
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amother
Blushpink
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Today at 5:22 pm
Hmmm
I’d be completely honest with the board and say it’s all a gift from your parents, kinda like they’re buying a suite to feel comfortable at your house…
I understand, parents choose how they want to give their money it’s tough but take the opportunity- no it shouldn’t affect your tuition break
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nech-3041
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Today at 5:28 pm
amother Tealblue wrote: | I disagree, because they are on a tuition discount. The school is allowing them to only pay 50% of the tuition under the assumption there aren’t extra funds available. It is definitely their business to know |
This isn’t extra funds for their pocket. Op a big kitchen is definitely a comfortable arrangement but no need to go crazy fancy about it either. If anything I would try to give from the surplus as an extra donation to the school coming from your parents or whoever else is sponsoring the project
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amother
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Today at 5:31 pm
nech-3041 wrote: | This isn’t extra funds for their pocket. Op a big kitchen is definitely a comfortable arrangement but no need to go crazy fancy about it either. If anything I would try to give from the surplus as an extra donation to the school coming from your parents or whoever else is sponsoring the project |
I know. My point is, if you are asking someone (the school) for a favor with money then it is their business to know what your finances are and what you spend on. And a big purchase should be disclosed, especially because they aren’t the ones even paying for it
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amother
Blue
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Today at 5:52 pm
My school’s financial aid form asks about financial gifts and I’ve explained when relevant. For example my in-laws gave us money toward a renovation and I disclosed the amount and that it was specifically for this purpose. Our financial aid amount didn’t change as a result.
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amother
Teal
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Today at 6:24 pm
amother Tealblue wrote: | I know. My point is, if you are asking someone (the school) for a favor with money then it is their business to know what your finances are and what you spend on. And a big purchase should be disclosed, especially because they aren’t the ones even paying for it | How does that make sense? They aren't spending any money on the construction. It doesn't affect their finances at all. So how does it affect the school?
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amother
Blush
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Today at 6:25 pm
This isn't a difficult question.
The discount form specifically asks about construction
You answer honestly and state that the money is a gift from your parents.
It is up to the school regarding how they want to deal with it.
To not say you are having construction done is a lie. To not explain that the funding is a gift explains it.
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amother
Poinsettia
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Today at 6:41 pm
I would accept the generous offer. I would also call the school or write a letter to the tuition committee explaining that our income hasn't changed, that these relatives are doing it for them for when they visit so they can stay but they will not just give the money to be used for tuition.
I would also disclose on the form again since they ask about any construction. And explain there, attach a letter etc.
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amother
Bluebell
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Today at 6:45 pm
Sounds like a dream come true
Thank you mom and dad
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seeker
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Today at 7:14 pm
If possible, I would try to have a conversation with the relevant party at the school in advance. The Jewish world is small and you don't want someone sitting on the tuition board who knows you just got a big renovation reading your application saying you haven't spent money on home improvement lately. Make it clear that your parents want it for their visits, and that they are not willing to help with tuition. I think they understand that family dynamics aren't always simple.
I did something like this once when we were offered a vacation. We were not offered cash, we were offered a vacation. I felt uncomfortable doing something inconsistent with the lifestyle I claim to have, and even if I would have done it anyway I felt so much better doing it with the blessing of the school principal who was happy that we had the opportunity and assured me that it wouldn't be held against me for a scholarship (I was so young though... Now I realize that what felt to me like a luxury vacation for 3 was practically a joke compared to the types of numbers they probably see from other people)
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doodlesmom
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Today at 8:13 pm
I would let the tuition board know that your parents are building a suite on your property for their use.
Simple.
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