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amother
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 Yesterday at 5:10 am
We are almost at that time of year again, when I’m forced to spend money somehow to keep my kids busy for an entire week because the school gives off.
When I say forced I don’t mean a lot of money (we don’t go to FL, though many many do), we either go to NY to visit family (which is a large expense in itself from where we live even though we drive), or I need things to keep the older kids busy for the week which costs.
I’m so frustrated by the whole thing, we literally aren’t even making it day to day. And yet I seem to be the only one, so many others are so excited about their trips to FL.
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amother
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Yesterday at 6:11 am
Yes it’s frustrating, but the kids and teachers need a break- winter break isn’t a Jewish invention.
If your kids are old enough, give them a budget and tell them they can either do 1 big thing or a bunch of small things and help them plan it out.
(In case you’re wondering, our plan is to make use of our Crayola membership one day, go ice skating one day, buy 1 new art project and chill the rest- do a lot of baking to refill the freezer for Shabbos till Pesach.
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amother
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Yesterday at 6:16 am
| amother Petunia wrote: | Yes it’s frustrating, but the kids and teachers need a break- winter break isn’t a Jewish invention.
If your kids are old enough, give them a budget and tell them they can either do 1 big thing or a bunch of small things and help them plan it out.
(In case you’re wondering, our plan is to make use of our Crayola membership one day, go ice skating one day, buy 1 new art project and chill the rest- do a lot of baking to refill the freezer for Shabbos till Pesach. |
Right but a whole week? We already have off significant for Chanukah. (Which is nice don’t get me wrong). The issue with midwinter is the expectation to do something.
Honestly even a budget to do one big thing is out of our budget. But ok, will make it work somehow.
I have kids of all ages so constant no structure just leads to fighting and messes and constant eating.
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amother
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Yesterday at 6:28 am
| amother OP wrote: | Right but a whole week? We already have off significant for Chanukah. (Which is nice don’t get me wrong). The issue with midwinter is the expectation to do something.
Honestly even a budget to do one big thing is out of our budget. But ok, will make it work somehow.
I have kids of all ages so constant no structure just leads to fighting and messes and constant eating. |
Ah, we just get 1 day for Chanukah (except the baby in a daycare on a public school schedule- but that’s not the elementary schools fault) so winter break is our big break.
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amother
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Yesterday at 6:32 am
| amother Petunia wrote: | | Ah, we just get 1 day for Chanukah (except the baby in a daycare on a public school schedule- but that’s not the elementary schools fault) so winter break is our big break. |
We have Thursday Friday and Monday. Winter vacation is Monday through Friday.
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amother
Snowflake
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Yesterday at 6:43 am
Hate to ruin your concept. Many who go to Florida are spending the least money to entertain the kids.
They get the airfare that is on those deals that you have to be quick to buy, save their points up all year to do free hotel, cheapest car rental or uber , eat peanut butter sandwiches or cereal and milk mostly and take the kids to free places.
Main expense can be saved anywhere by going free places that are new. With a lot of work you can do a staycation for a great price.
Try to make memories and frame it for yourself in a positive way.
My friend does movie night with sleeping bags and major popcorn once a year (they don't watch otherwise), near free and the kids always look forward. Another only spends on a very fancy eating out trip and the rest low-key. Another does every day trips but less expensive places. Another does a mega project (super handy type).
Figure out what you enjoy, do that ,so your kids will feel your joy, and try to be positive.
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amother
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Yesterday at 7:05 am
| amother Snowflake wrote: | Hate to ruin your concept. Many who go to Florida are spending the least money to entertain the kids.
They get the airfare that is on those deals that you have to be quick to buy, save their points up all year to do free hotel, cheapest car rental or uber , eat peanut butter sandwiches or cereal and milk mostly and take the kids to free places.
Main expense can be saved anywhere by going free places that are new. With a lot of work you can do a staycation for a great price.
Try to make memories and frame it for yourself in a positive way.
My friend does movie night with sleeping bags and major popcorn once a year (they don't watch otherwise), near free and the kids always look forward. Another only spends on a very fancy eating out trip and the rest low-key. Another does every day trips but less expensive places. Another does a mega project (super handy type).
Figure out what you enjoy, do that ,so your kids will feel your joy, and try to be positive. |
Even if we got cheapest tickets and cheapest place to say cheapest car it would be $600. I don’t have that kind of money
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amother
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Yesterday at 7:06 am
| amother Snowflake wrote: | Hate to ruin your concept. Many who go to Florida are spending the least money to entertain the kids.
They get the airfare that is on those deals that you have to be quick to buy, save their points up all year to do free hotel, cheapest car rental or uber , eat peanut butter sandwiches or cereal and milk mostly and take the kids to free places.
Main expense can be saved anywhere by going free places that are new. With a lot of work you can do a staycation for a great price.
Try to make memories and frame it for yourself in a positive way.
My friend does movie night with sleeping bags and major popcorn once a year (they don't watch otherwise), near free and the kids always look forward. Another only spends on a very fancy eating out trip and the rest low-key. Another does every day trips but less expensive places. Another does a mega project (super handy type).
Figure out what you enjoy, do that ,so your kids will feel your joy, and try to be positive. |
We’re done lots of free places not much to do local. Movie night is great but it’s one night we have a whole week.
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DVOM
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Yesterday at 7:06 am
| amother OP wrote: | Right but a whole week? We already have off significant for Chanukah. (Which is nice don’t get me wrong). The issue with midwinter is the expectation to do something.
Honestly even a budget to do one big thing is out of our budget. But ok, will make it work somehow.
I have kids of all ages so constant no structure just leads to fighting and messes and constant eating. |
I totally get you, OP! Money is so tight this year. We'll be going no where for midwinter vacation.
The COVID lockdown was a game changer for me. There was no where to go and nothing to spend money on. The key, for us, to a very positive 4ish months home, was exercise, structure, and ritual. It costs next to nothing, and makes such a huge difference!
Make a schedule with your kids. Write it down. Day one of vacation can be planning day. Engage your kids in helping create the schedule, research your activities, make lists of any supplies needed, send bigger kids out to shop.
Daven together with the littles while the biggies go to shul. Sing together out loud. You'd be surprised by how fun it is.
Make a huge breakfast. Everyone loves a massive breakfast. Food can be such an activity. Find and follow a recipe for homemade bagels, or muffins, or pita. Make a big pan of eggs. Make waffles. Fruit salad. We all look forward to vacation breakfasts.
Pick a place to walk each day. We live in NJ. NJ is beautiful! Vary by day: beach, woods, quaint little town, public garden, interesting playground. We pack thermoses full of hot cocoa and coffee, pack an interesting snack (marshmallow and peanut butter mixed with fiber 1 cereal formed into balls and frozen is a current fave) bundle up, and walk for about an hour each morning. Go geocaching. Collect seashells and interesting rocks and feathers for art (see below). Take bikes or scooters. Find out if there are any free museums nearby. We've gone to so many weird and interesting free museums. Go to the library and see if they have a free tickets program.
Make a huge lunch. At least once or twice make a backyard bonfire and have a cookout. So much fun.
Once everyone has walked and eaten, they'll be very ready to settle down for a creative activity.
Find tutorials on YouTube to follow. Listen to an audio book together while you draw or craft. Make 'junk art'. We save clean garbage (cardboard food and delivery boxes, any interesting plastic bottles,jars, caps, glass jars, wrapping paper and ribbons...) in a big bag in the garage for a few months at a time. Junk sculptures can be beautiful and so much fun to make. Make paper mache out of old newspaper. Go to your local big appliance store and see if they'll give you a fridge or freezer box to make into a castle. Find a home improvement project that everyone can do. We just finished retiling our fireplace. I put pics of it up on my Instagram page (round of applause! I'm really learning how to use Instagram! If anyone wants to see my fireplace, dm me! It came out gorgeous 🤩). My kids had so much fun demoing, cutting tiles, mixing and spreading cement, grouting, making their own creations with leftover tile scraps. Bake and decorate sugar cookies. Make and stretch your own saltwater taffy.
Eat dinner. Have a cookbook party: let each kid pick an interesting recipe to make for dinner each night. Set the timer and play MasterChef.
End each day with a big family clean up, and then a movie or board game or read a chapter book out loud, one chapter a night.
Fun doesn't need to cost anything.
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amother
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Yesterday at 7:09 am
| DVOM wrote: | I totally get you, OP! Money is so tight this year. We'll be going no where for midwinter vacation.
The COVID lockdown was a game changer for me. There was no where to go and nothing to spend money on. The key, for us, to a very positive 4ish months home, was exercise, structure, and ritual. It costs next to nothing, and makes such a huge difference!
Make a schedule with your kids. Write it down. Day one of vacation can be planning day. Engage your kids in helping create the schedule, research your activities, make lists of any supplies needed, send bigger kids out to shop.
Daven together with the littles while the biggies go to shul. Sing together out loud. You'd be surprised by how fun it is.
Make a huge breakfast. Everyone loves a massive breakfast. Food can be such an activity. Find and follow a recipe for homemade bagels, or muffins, or pita. Make a big pan of eggs. Make waffles. Fruit salad. We all look forward to vacation breakfasts.
Pick a place to walk each day. We live in NJ. NJ is beautiful! Vary by day: beach, woods, quaint little town, public garden, interesting playground. We pack thermoses full of hot cocoa and coffee, pack an interesting snack (marshmallow and peanut butter mixed with fiber 1 cereal formed into balls and frozen is a current fave) bundle up, and walk for about an hour each morning. Go geocaching. Collect seashells and interesting rocks and feathers for art (see below). Take bikes or scooters. Find out if there are any free museums nearby. We've gone to so many weird and interesting free museums. Go to the library and see if they have a free tickets program.
Make a huge lunch. At least once or twice make a backyard bonfire and have a cookout. So much fun.
Once everyone has walked and eaten, they'll be very ready to settle down for a creative activity.
Find tutorials on YouTube to follow. Listen to an audio book together while you draw or craft. Make 'junk art'. We save clean garbage (cardboard food and delivery boxes, any interesting plastic bottles,jars, caps, glass jars, wrapping paper and ribbons...) in a big bag in the garage for a few months at a time. Junk sculptures can be beautiful and so much fun to make. Make paper mache out of old newspaper. Go to your local big appliance store and see if they'll give you a fridge or freezer box to make into a castle. Find a home improvement project that everyone can do. We just finished retiling our fireplace. I put pics of it up on my Instagram page (round of applause! I'm really learning how to use Instagram! If anyone wants to see my fireplace, dm me! It came out gorgeous 🤩). My kids had so much fun demoing, cutting tiles, mixing and spreading cement, grouting, making their own creations with leftover tile scraps. Bake and decorate sugar cookies. Make and stretch your own saltwater taffy.
Eat dinner. Have a cookbook party: let each kid pick an interesting recipe to make for dinner each night. Set the timer and play MasterChef.
End each day with a big family clean up, and then a movie or board game or read a chapter book out loud, one chapter a night.
Fun doesn't need to cost anything. |
So I don’t do well with this. Covid was very hard for me. Some people are naturally better at this. I’m not it’s so so hard for me. I’m
Not creative I’m not the type who can entertain my kids for hours. My kids are not the type to agree on and stick to a schedule.
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Amelia Bedelia
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Yesterday at 7:12 am
| DVOM wrote: | I totally get you, OP! Money is so tight this year. We'll be going no where for midwinter vacation.
The COVID lockdown was a game changer for me. There was no where to go and nothing to spend money on. The key, for us, to a very positive 4ish months home, was exercise, structure, and ritual. It costs next to nothing, and makes such a huge difference!
Make a schedule with your kids. Write it down. Day one of vacation can be planning day. Engage your kids in helping create the schedule, research your activities, make lists of any supplies needed, send bigger kids out to shop.
Daven together with the littles while the biggies go to shul. Sing together out loud. You'd be surprised by how fun it is.
Make a huge breakfast. Everyone loves a massive breakfast. Food can be such an activity. Find and follow a recipe for homemade bagels, or muffins, or pita. Make a big pan of eggs. Make waffles. Fruit salad. We all look forward to vacation breakfasts.
Pick a place to walk each day. We live in NJ. NJ is beautiful! Vary by day: beach, woods, quaint little town, public garden, interesting playground. We pack thermoses full of hot cocoa and coffee, pack an interesting snack (marshmallow and peanut butter mixed with fiber 1 cereal formed into balls and frozen is a current fave) bundle up, and walk for about an hour each morning. Go geocaching. Collect seashells and interesting rocks and feathers for art (see below). Take bikes or scooters. Find out if there are any free museums nearby. We've gone to so many weird and interesting free museums. Go to the library and see if they have a free tickets program.
Make a huge lunch. At least once or twice make a backyard bonfire and have a cookout. So much fun.
Once everyone has walked and eaten, they'll be very ready to settle down for a creative activity.
Find tutorials on YouTube to follow. Listen to an audio book together while you draw or craft. Make 'junk art'. We save clean garbage (cardboard food and delivery boxes, any interesting plastic bottles,jars, caps, glass jars, wrapping paper and ribbons...) in a big bag in the garage for a few months at a time. Junk sculptures can be beautiful and so much fun to make. Make paper mache out of old newspaper. Go to your local big appliance store and see if they'll give you a fridge or freezer box to make into a castle. Find a home improvement project that everyone can do. We just finished retiling our fireplace. I put pics of it up on my Instagram page (round of applause! I'm really learning how to use Instagram! If anyone wants to see my fireplace, dm me! It came out gorgeous 🤩). My kids had so much fun demoing, cutting tiles, mixing and spreading cement, grouting, making their own creations with leftover tile scraps. Bake and decorate sugar cookies. Make and stretch your own saltwater taffy.
Eat dinner. Have a cookbook party: let each kid pick an interesting recipe to make for dinner each night. Set the timer and play MasterChef.
End each day with a big family clean up, and then a movie or board game or read a chapter book out loud, one chapter a night.
Fun doesn't need to cost anything. |
Wow! So impressive! You are an amazing mom and so creative! Your kids are so lucky.
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amother
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Yesterday at 7:16 am
| Amelia Bedelia wrote: | | Wow! So impressive! You are an amazing mom and so creative! Your kids are so lucky. |
And not everyone has those strengths. Guess I’m a bad mom and my poor kids who don’t have that kind of mom and just have to sit at home through vacation
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DVOM
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Yesterday at 7:35 am
| amother OP wrote: | | And not everyone has those strengths. Guess I’m a bad mom and my poor kids who don’t have that kind of mom and just have to sit at home through vacation |
Oh hon....
There are lots of ways to be a good mom. I bet you are a good mom!
If the creative stuff aren't your personality, skip them. It doesn't take creativity to take a walk, play a board game, follow a recipe.
Think about what you enjoy. Yoga? Puzzles? Build your day around that.
Your attitude, your joy and contentment in spending time with your kids, will infuse any actively with happiness. Your kids will feel it, and remember it.
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amother
Diamond
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Yesterday at 7:46 am
| amother Snowflake wrote: | Hate to ruin your concept. Many who go to Florida are spending the least money to entertain the kids.
They get the airfare that is on those deals that you have to be quick to buy, save their points up all year to do free hotel, cheapest car rental or uber , eat peanut butter sandwiches or cereal and milk mostly and take the kids to free places.
Main expense can be saved anywhere by going free places that are new. With a lot of work you can do a staycation for a great price.
Try to make memories and frame it for yourself in a positive way.
My friend does movie night with sleeping bags and major popcorn once a year (they don't watch otherwise), near free and the kids always look forward. Another only spends on a very fancy eating out trip and the rest low-key. Another does every day trips but less expensive places. Another does a mega project (super handy type).
Figure out what you enjoy, do that ,so your kids will feel your joy, and try to be positive. |
How many people are really getting those amazing flight deals. I know very few if any and they’re usually for random dates not the perfect times for midwinter. Most tell me oh it’s so cheap because we used points. Well points are money. Some of us don’t have the luxury of using our points for vacation we need to convert them to cash and use them for living expenses.
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amother
Calendula
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Yesterday at 7:47 am
OP, not sure why so many of the responses sound like they are basically telling you it’s your fault you have nothing to do over vacation and if you’d just have a good attitude, your kids would have a blast and they’re making it into potential! And bonding! And excitement! And unicorns and rainbows and sunshine!
Vacation can be hard, and when it seems like “everyone” around manages to go someplace and do something big, it’s hard to be left out. And no matter how good an attitude you have, some teens will still feel bad to stay home and do free day trips. I don’t know how “everyone” manages these big trips, year after year, sometimes multiple times in one year- it seems that has become the norm, and staying home the exception. I don’t have wise advise, just wanted to say you’re not alone.
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amother
Sunflower
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Yesterday at 9:02 am
| amother Petunia wrote: | Yes it’s frustrating, but the kids and teachers need a break- winter break isn’t a Jewish invention.
If your kids are old enough, give them a budget and tell them they can either do 1 big thing or a bunch of small things and help them plan it out.
(In case you’re wondering, our plan is to make use of our Crayola membership one day, go ice skating one day, buy 1 new art project and chill the rest- do a lot of baking to refill the freezer for Shabbos till Pesach. |
Agree that everyone needs a break, but if the school has chanukah vacation, purim vacation and pesach vacation, the kids really do get their breaks already as is.
On a separate note, I love the ideas on this thread, so keep them coming.
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amother
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Yesterday at 9:31 am
I definitely agree that the mothers attitude will carry the day even if the teens sulk. Don't let them bring down the whole family.
Second, check if any of your cc give free hotel nights. I've done some one night trips that were pretty mega. Packing up, driving as long as u can, bathroom breaks... hotel pool, fitness room, movie night... then the next daywe ask for late checkout so until we leave is about 1. Then we find some cheap attraction nearby. Takeout for dinner and we always get good vibes after. And the whole thing cost gas and maybe few snacks.
Teens are asked in advance to be cheerful or make other plans by friends for the night but they always choose to join.
Dh can't take off more than one day from work but this easily fills 3 days. One day is packing and getting ready to leave at 6 when he gets here, next day we're away, and the next day is laundry and just getting everything back together, like a stay at home kinda day.
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amother
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Yesterday at 9:34 am
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I wanted to add that vacation even with the best attitude drains me to the next level. But I really feel that if I don't keep it upbeat and try to have plans then we get into a rut of sulking and fighting which is harder to get out of than to plan ahead simple family activities
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honey36
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Yesterday at 10:13 am
OP, what were you looking to gain from this thread?
Is it just a vent? If so, yes your right. Our kids have too much vacation and it doesn't work for a lot of families. It's a bummer. I totally get you.
But please don't get frustrated by the advice other people are giving. They are not trying to make you feel bad. They are just trying to help. If you feel it doesn't work for you/your family, just say so and move on.
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honey36
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Yesterday at 10:16 am
One more piece of advice no one else mentioned yet that might help you:
If you have any friends/neighbors/family that have kids of similar ages- I've traded kids with them for the day so we could do better age friendly activities. E.g. one mom takes the teens sledding/skating/biking/rollerblading (weather dependent), one mom stays home with the littles and builds snowman/indoor crafts etc.
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