No Motivation to Correct Child

Giraffe

Yesterday at 9:01 pm

I wanted to be the most well behaved child. I did not want to be the stereotyped teenager.

I was beaten and screamed at by parents and bullied in elementary school. Got slapped for getting answers wrong. Did a bajillion chores and was basically the maid of the house. But I never gave in to peer pressure to do bad things.

In high school I was finally not bullied. Got good grades. Did not get in trouble.

High school staff did not like that I was socializing enough. So they forced therapy on me. My parents started to criticize if I did not speak enough. Not enough the stress of doing a bajillion chores. Not enough the stress of keeping high grades. Now I have to be good at such a subjective experience. I told them many times there are successful women who do not talk much. But to no avail.

I acted out in high school. I wanted sympathy so I acted mentally ill. Until I indeed became mentally ill. It stayed with me in college and at my job. Nearly got fired and wanted to take my own life. I did the complete opposite of the forced intervention in high school. I stay away from socializing and avoid people. Only doing what is necessary. My life came back together. Imagine that. I was right all along.

I reached out to my principal from high school. I snapped at her. She asked for my Mechila. But every time I did something at work that got me in trouble because of what I said, I would then email the principal and snap at her until she could not take it anymore and said the high school staff only had good intentions and wished me the best and probably blocked my email. I guess I now can't ask mechila to her for taking it out on her and just have to deal with it in gehinnom.

Now I have a daughter who has problems in school. But I am not motivated to correct her. Because I was so good and everyone found problems with me anyway. So why bother? Better they have some real problems to solve then make up pointless problems so they can get money from medicaid or other insurance to force an easy child into therapy.

So if anyone is complaining about kids these days, make sure you are not punishing the well behaved kids as well. Because what is the point of being well behaved if you are going to force them to be a rigid stereotype and therefore making them problem children as well.