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-> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
imaima
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 Yesterday at 3:20 am
| amother Hydrangea wrote: | | It's been sustainable for 70+ years and suddenly in 2024 its not sustainable? Do you really believe that? |
I personally do believe that many practices in the frum community are not sustainable and will have to die out or change in the future
70 years is a relatively short period of time
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imaima
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Yesterday at 3:36 am
| amother OP wrote: | | Really? Tuition doubling in three years is predictable? How, exactly? Are you really saying that the trajectory of the economy in the last few years was predictable and normal and we should have all seen it coming? |
People did see it coming and economical crises are a scientific fact
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amother
DarkPurple
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Yesterday at 4:16 am
Wow - that sounds incredibly hard. People who haven't experienced it first-hand don't seem to realize that you can do all the right things financially and still find yourself in a really bad place, through no fault of your own. May Hashem send you parnassah b'shefah! Right away!
Just wondering, do you really need two cars? Would that be a place to save somewhat?
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amother
Gold
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Yesterday at 6:33 am
You’re doing everything right.
People who don’t get it haven’t been there.
All Jewish children deserve chinuch even if it’s by community tzedaka or fundraising.
May hashem send you abundant Parnasa.
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care4u
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Yesterday at 7:07 am
| amother Hydrangea wrote: | | And playgroups went up because of CHS. Everyone here knows that. |
In-house play groups have gone up because expenses have gone up for the morahs just like everyone else.
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amother
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Yesterday at 7:30 am
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Side point: running a playgroup means you open by 9 AM and cannot be carpooling at that time.
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amother
NeonGreen
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Yesterday at 7:34 am
I'm still stuck on the part where people actually think that their jobs sustains them and their families.
I think I learned in school (not sure how much tuition cost then) that Hashem is the one that sustains all mankind and even the ant that is building tunnels in the sand. Hashem provides food for the cat that is homeless and for the toad in the pond. None of them hold down jobs or are on birth control.
A person can have all the money in the world and die of hunger. He is not being sustained by his money, he is being sustained by Hashem. At a certain time in history people burned their $100.00 bills to use as fuel because there was no other heating option.
Let's circle back to the real source of all our income, of all our sustenance. It's impossible to sustain yourselves from all these outside things. And if it does happen, it's because Hashem conceals himself within those parameters, not because it's actually a source of sustenance.
This is not an old fashioned concept, it's very much alive these days as it was from the beginning of time.
Unless of course you are transferring your belief from Hashem and putting it onto your jobs/incomes.
Then of course you are confining yourself.
Op, don't let yourself get hurt or change your view in life by the naysayers here.
May Hashem bring lots of shefa into your life and may you enjoy lots of nachas from all of your children!
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amother
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Yesterday at 7:35 am
| amother Wandflower wrote: | | Side point: running a playgroup means you open by 9 AM and cannot be carpooling at that time. |
Not necessarily, demand is so high in Lakewood you’re able to fill almost any time slots.
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amother
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Yesterday at 7:36 am
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OP, I want to apologize for hurting you last night, you have brought 8 neshamos into klal Yisroel and that is very precious. I hope you get a yeshua in parnassa very soon.
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amother
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Yesterday at 8:01 am
This was so painful to read. Everyone here thinks they have the solution. It says never judge another because if you were them you would do exactly like they did.
Such non Jewish concepts seeped into our Jewish world. This is Torah. Hashem said multiply and work. He didn't say if things get tough abandon your children. OP sometimes posting these things are so frustrating to see how Jewish mothers react. And makes you rethink your life. If you have a god trust that he takes care of you because he loves you and loves that you're continuing to build his nation. And also realize we live in a very complicated world. We don't have solutions for everything and everyone. Sometimes it's just a matter of letting go and reminding ourselves that there is a god. And he wants us to turn towards him. Not towards people. And Def not towards imamother.
With that said.. We haven't paid tuition in 3 years. My husband had a great job and we lived very normally with 4 children. Not 8. And crisis hit and he lost his job and went into major debt and mentally was unwell and ended up needing alot of help to live. He attempted suicide because he didn't have the skills to know things are temporary. 3 years later we don't pay tuition and the school has full permission to kick my kids out. And I don't blame them. I'm grateful every they they go and they come home at the correct time. Yet it doesn't stop me from living. And smiling. And believing that hashem gives and hashem takes. And God willing soon when we get through this nisayon hashem will give endlessly. But with the amount of expenses that doubled over the past 3 years does look impossible to live. Our mortgage was very doable when we bought our house. Than property taxes shot up tremendously. Tuition shot up. Gosh just buying a pepper doubled. Can't just give up cars and houses. You'll be left with tuition and homeless crisis. Schools can revamp and change the way they operate. I don't look for people to tell me their genius solutions. They have their own problems they can't fix. I rely on God and I don't need to be convinced I'm doing the right thing.
OP.. Hashem gave you this life. You're given the skills and tools to get through it. And hard times will pass iyh.
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amother
Strawberry
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Yesterday at 8:13 am
| amother Wandflower wrote: | | Side point: running a playgroup means you open by 9 AM and cannot be carpooling at that time. |
930. Maybe 915. Playgroups in Lakewood just don’t start at 9
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amother
Natural
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Yesterday at 8:19 am
Op I'm so sorry for what u are going through.
I dont live in lakewood and I'm in a similar situation, I'm paying tuition but only part of it cause we just can't afford it. My last child was born with some health issues and this put us more in debt. He has health insurance but just gas parking and tolls is ramping up fast, and the entire situation is just very time consuming .
Also have 20k in cc debt which we are slowly paying off , so some things just fall to the sides
Our school has been understanding too bh
I hope it gets easier for you soon.
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amother
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Yesterday at 8:19 am
| amother Oxfordblue wrote: | | This is such a disgusting anti Torah sentiment and reflects on the real issue of our society today. Yeshiva tuition is not more important than birthing another Jewish neshama. Our priorities are totally skewed. |
I don't disagree with this. And I also appreciate that OP took the time to share, in detail, her situation. It's unsurprising that a couple, both working full time, but with less than stellar income, and with many children, can't afford tuition. And I don't think having less children is the answer. Having a large family is beautiful. But I don't think not paying tuition which leads to teachers being paid less than they're worth, and often late, is the answer either. There has got to be a way to revamp our whole system so that every child can get a great Jewish education, that nearly all parents can afford it, and schools can hire and pay the best quality teachers what they're worth.
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amother
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Yesterday at 8:30 am
| amother Hydrangea wrote: | | It's been sustainable for 70+ years and suddenly in 2024 its not sustainable? Do you really believe that? |
It never was sustainable. A system that is built upon the support of others is destined to collapse, it's just a matter of when. In terms of systems, 70 years is short time. If this started 70 years ago, obviously the money was there. But as communities grow exponentially, the money usually doesn't. So we have been heading in this direction for a long time. It's just the inflation that has sped up the process.
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amother
Oleander
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Yesterday at 8:34 am
| chestnut wrote: | That would explain very low tuitions back then there, but rent needed to be paid even for small apartments, plus ppl were still buying houses, I'm sure. Food, medical expenses, Simchas were still happening (yes, on a totally different level, but still).
These days we see families with normal incomes not affording daily expenses. I don't think it was the case in the 70-80s Brooklyn and Monsey. That is not to say there weren't poor ppl back then who couldn't afford tuition and rent. But it's so different now - we aren't talking about poor families. | The $300 BMG kollel check covered rent for the entire month! Money was actually worth something back then.
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amother
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Yesterday at 8:40 am
| DrMom wrote: | | If you read what I wrote, I cited general rising costs as the first reason for tuition increases. |
But the second part is not true. The schools raised their prices before the so called current tuition crisis (incidently, the only place I'm hearing about this tuition crisis is on imamother). So they did not raise their prices because of some parent's inability to pay, if anything, the reverse is true.
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amother
Obsidian
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Yesterday at 8:40 am
| amother NeonGreen wrote: | I'm still stuck on the part where people actually think that their jobs sustains them and their families.
I think I learned in school (not sure how much tuition cost then) that Hashem is the one that sustains all mankind and even the ant that is building tunnels in the sand. Hashem provides food for the cat that is homeless and for the toad in the pond. None of them hold down jobs or are on birth control.
A person can have all the money in the world and die of hunger. He is not being sustained by his money, he is being sustained by Hashem. At a certain time in history people burned their $100.00 bills to use as fuel because there was no other heating option.
Let's circle back to the real source of all our income, of all our sustenance. It's impossible to sustain yourselves from all these outside things. And if it does happen, it's because Hashem conceals himself within those parameters, not because it's actually a source of sustenance.
This is not an old fashioned concept, it's very much alive these days as it was from the beginning of time.
Unless of course you are transferring your belief from Hashem and putting it onto your jobs/incomes.
Then of course you are confining yourself.
Op, don't let yourself get hurt or change your view in life by the naysayers here.
May Hashem bring lots of shefa into your life and may you enjoy lots of nachas from all of your children! |
BH for good posters like you !!
Hashem should bentch everyone here and all of klal Yisroel with shefa bracha HATZlocha and Menuchas hanefesh
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amother
Cantaloupe
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Yesterday at 8:40 am
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The biggest expense difference by far since the 70s and 80s is housing and it affects everyone across the board. When I was married we were told housing should cost 20% of income. We lived in a 4 bedroom apartment in Boro Park for years with a price tag of 800 a month. Now housing is about 60% with the leftover being split between all other expenses. Add in the gashmiyus boom, fueled hugely by the schools and you found your culprit. Family size has nothing to do with it.
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amother
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Yesterday at 8:42 am
| amother DarkViolet wrote: | | It never was sustainable. A system that is built upon the support of others is destined to collapse, it's just a matter of when. In terms of systems, 70 years is short time. If this started 70 years ago, obviously the money was there. But as communities grow exponentially, the money usually doesn't. So we have been heading in this direction for a long time. It's just the inflation that has sped up the process. |
I'm talking about the yeshiva/bais yaakov system. How do you see it being built on the support of others? There is a LOT more money floating around in 2024 than there was in the 1950's, trust me.
And of course it's sustainable, in some way, shape or form until Moshiach comes. Nothing that's worthwhile comes easily, but iyh we will manage.
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amother
Indigo
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Yesterday at 8:42 am
And then we wonder why Mother’s say they can’t work full time….
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