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Forum
-> Household Management
-> Finances
B'Syata D'Shmya
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Yesterday at 7:12 am
amother OP wrote: | This is what I was thinking.
Still not completely sure.
Hard to live with that yet a [gentile] taking it isn't a good solution either |
I think this is one of those posts that OP stops when she gets an answer that validates what she wants to do.
It matters not what other people think and honestly, OP didnt cause the situation nor the problem that brought the house to foreclose.
We do have a mitzvah to help a Jewish family before they fall, so I would involve Daas Torah before proceeding.
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Hashem_Yaazor
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Yesterday at 7:26 am
Definitely speak to a Rav.
This isn't necessarily something related only to personal feelings but has halachic considerations that need to be taken into account.
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amother
Dandelion
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Yesterday at 8:17 am
My relative bought a house in an auction. He had to pay the owner $50,000 to leave even after he won it.
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amother
IndianRed
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Yesterday at 8:23 am
A relative of mine did this. He paid under $200k, sold his house 3 years later for $675k and then bought a huge house for $850k.
He did very well for himself but many people in the community won't have what to do with him because of it.
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Just Me :)
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Yesterday at 8:30 am
Are you willing to lose a relationship over buying a house, and know that every time they hear your name and see your house and your face they will feel so much pain from your actions?
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amother
Crocus
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Yesterday at 8:31 am
Raizle wrote: | I have a question. And this is not a judgement, im just wondering if there is something I don't know about how it works.
How do people get to the point of foreclosure? If you are having trouble paying your mortgage wouldn't the sensible thing to do be to sell your house before the bank takes it from you? Pay down the mortgage and you get to keep the rest as opposed to foreclosure.
Can someone explain it to me? |
When you figure in the realtor fees and other expenses of selling the house it may not always be worth it. I know someone who was foreclosed on. She and husband felt that if they are going to lose the house and their down payment anyway, they may as well stay there rent free for the next two years until the foreclosure goes through and they get thrown out. Possibly something would happen in the next two years that will make them able to stay and avoid foreclosure. If not the two years of living rent free is better than the money they could make off selling the house. Plus they had enough headaches on their heads at the time . They weren't interested in the additional one of trying to sell the house and looking for a place to move to.
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amother
Antiquewhite
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Yesterday at 8:41 am
amother Razzmatazz wrote: | I am the one that posted this why am I rude for suggesting that people and yourself help the family out? aren't we here on earth to help others? unless I am mistaken . . ... |
Ok so help them. How much $$ are you giving so that they don't lose their home? You start, and we'll all go next.
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amother
PlumPink
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Yesterday at 8:56 am
A relative of mine got kicked out of her house by the person who was going to buy her house back for her on auction. Ugly, dirty, horrible thing to find yourself homeless because of another backstabbing yid.
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amother
Calendula
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Yesterday at 9:00 am
..its prob not straight forward foreclosure. Hoping for large cash buy out under table. I wouldnt even look at any yiddisha house in foreclosure for that reason. I do have neighbors that have done it and it caused some discomfort for first few years but then all move on
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nicole81
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Yesterday at 9:04 am
Raizle wrote: | I have a question. And this is not a judgement, im just wondering if there is something I don't know about how it works.
How do people get to the point of foreclosure? If you are having trouble paying your mortgage wouldn't the sensible thing to do be to sell your house before the bank takes it from you? Pay down the mortgage and you get to keep the rest as opposed to foreclosure.
Can someone explain it to me? |
I'll answer. My ex lost his job and we wouldn't be able to afford rent anyway on my salary alone at the time, so if we were to sell it, we'd end up with nowhere to go. We had only purchased the house 2 years earlier after the bubble burst but it was still on the decline so there was no equity. So sell it for nothing and then what? Live on the streets?The hope is you fall behind a few months but then you get back on your feet.
Then we separated and he never paid child support or anything towards my kids' tuition or camp which was necessary due to my job, so there was no way I could pay the mortgage or rent anywhere and every month you don't pay the mortgage, they add it, plus late fees and interest, to what you owe. So for example if you have a 500k mortgage with a monthly payment of 3k and you don't pay it for 6 months, you don't still owe 500k, you now owe about 525k so it's a never ending deep hole.
In my situation, I banked on the long foreclosure process in NYC, especially being a single mother with a lawyer to push things off, to take that time and get a second master's degree that would qualify me in my field for a lot more money, which bh worked out and I tripled my salary and was able to get out of foreclosure before any auction was near.
But to give you an example of the hole that was made, I started with a 415k mortgage and ended up owing 680k at the end of the mess. Bh it's worth more than that now anyway, but you wanted to know how someone falls into foreclosure. It's not hard with a job loss, little equity, and not enough income to pay rent otherwise.
And for anyone who feels bad don't you worry, I actually own 2 homes now. I built myself up in my career, built my credit up, and much more bh. That was a long time ago.
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mizle10
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Yesterday at 9:59 am
amother IndianRed wrote: | A relative of mine did this. He paid under $200k, sold his house 3 years later for $675k and then bought a huge house for $850k.
He did very well for himself but many people in the community won't have what to do with him because of it. |
Very true. If you were to actually end up buying the house your new neighbors would most probably not be very welcoming to you...
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amother
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Yesterday at 10:05 am
We had a beloved neighbor whose house foreclosed and was bought out by someone ….
No one could bear to stop by and visit the new neighbors. It was too difficult for anyone to witness this occurrence.
We all miss the old neighbor and feel sick about the situation.
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amother
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Yesterday at 10:24 am
I'm a little uncomfortable with some of this conversation.
Recently we were in a situation where we needed to debate buying a house that we couldn't afford or to rent much more expensive.
Some people were encouraging us to buy saying "don't worry, klal Yisroel is generous. Worst case you'll go into foreclosure and the community will bail you out and buy up the house for you".
It made me uncomfortable. So we chose to rent for now.
But it also made me wonder how common that thought is. And people who are telling OP not to buy would feel differently if they knew that the family deliberately overextended themselves while buying the house and can't really afford the mortgage.
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amother
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Yesterday at 10:28 am
amother Birch wrote: | I'm a little uncomfortable with some of this conversation.
Recently we were in a situation where we needed to debate buying a house that we couldn't afford or to rent much more expensive.
Some people were encouraging us to buy saying "don't worry, klal Yisroel is generous. Worst case you'll go into foreclosure and the community will bail you out and buy up the house for you".
It made me uncomfortable. So we chose to rent for now.
But it also made me wonder how common that thought is. And people who are telling OP not to buy would feel differently if they knew that the family deliberately overextended themselves while buying the house and can't really afford the mortgage. |
I know of two cases where a kehilla or neighborhood was able to help. So with my neighbor whose foreclosure was bought by a frum person, people were shocked that it all happened like that
The your loss is my gain concept is really frowned down upon in the frum world for good reason.
Of course it is understandable that people need houses and foreclosures can help make a home purchase more affordable in today’s economical climate . Trust me - I need a house desperately!
However, sometimes two things can be true and ends do not justify the means.
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amother
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Yesterday at 10:34 am
amother Molasses wrote: | I know of two cases where a kehilla or neighborhood was able to help. So with my neighbor whose foreclosure was bought by a frum person, people were shocked that it all happened like that |
Ok.
But what about the scenarios where someone buys a house KNOWING they can't afford the mortgage. Knowing they will fall behind. Knowing they will likely go into foreclosure unless a nes happens.
Should the community swoop in and help in those cases?
Im hearing more and more people approaching foreclosure. Especially now. People bought insane mortgages, (6k a month) hoping to get raises or better jobs. Then the job market is doing more poorly so they can't get the raises they were hoping.
Do we think it's the community's responsibility to help people out of foreclosure if they bought unrealistically.
Maybe it should be the community's responsibility to collect so everyone can buy a house in the first place.
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amother
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Yesterday at 10:35 am
amother Birch wrote: | Ok.
But what about the scenarios where someone buys a house KNOWING they can't afford the mortgage. Knowing they will fall behind. Knowing they will likely go into foreclosure unless a nes happens.
Should the community swoop in and help in those cases?
Im hearing more and more people approaching foreclosure. Especially now. People bought insane mortgages, (6k a month) hoping to get raises or better jobs. Then the job market is doing more poorly so they can't get the raises they were hoping.
Do we think it's the community's responsibility to help people out of foreclosure if they bought unrealistically.
Maybe it should be the community's responsibility to collect so everyone can buy a house in the first place. |
That’s obviously a different story .
Is that the case here? Op should have specified .
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amother
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Yesterday at 10:37 am
amother Molasses wrote: | That’s obviously a different story .
Is that the case here? Op should have specified . |
Im not talking about OPs case.
Im reacting to the conversation in general.
Where posters are responding that the community MUST help a family in foreclosure.
Im wondering. Really? Always?
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amother
Gold
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Yesterday at 11:44 am
amother OP wrote: | I see a house going to auction very soon. I know the people pretty well and honestly shocked it is going to Auction. They have a lot of family in the neighborhood which makes it more surprising to me.
I feel bad to bid.
On the other hand it's a once in a lifetime opportunity to live in that area which has gone up so much in price. Finding anything in that location is hard now.
It's tempting.
Yet id feel horrible knowing I 'took' their house.
On the other hand, once on auction, someone will put a bid. And it might be non jews.
I wish they could be helped. I don't know the situation.
So hard. For them. And for deciding what is right.
Any insight to offer? |
This is a halachic question. Ask your rav.
My relative, an alman, was kicked out of his house by a yid who bought it at foreclosure. My relatives rav spoke to the person who bought it and they did not listen to the rav and bought it anyway. This yid will have a big place in gehenom for all the pain he put my relative through. Every time I pass the house I remember what they did and it is so painful. If the person hadn't bought it, a relative was planning on buying it for the alman but that person hiked up the price. Be very careful what you do. Your playing with fire.
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amother
Azure
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Yesterday at 11:55 am
amother Birch wrote: | Ok.
But what about the scenarios where someone buys a house KNOWING they can't afford the mortgage. Knowing they will fall behind. Knowing they will likely go into foreclosure unless a nes happens.
Should the community swoop in and help in those cases?
Im hearing more and more people approaching foreclosure. Especially now. People bought insane mortgages, (6k a month) hoping to get raises or better jobs. Then the job market is doing more poorly so they can't get the raises they were hoping.
Do we think it's the community's responsibility to help people out of foreclosure if they bought unrealistically.
Maybe it should be the community's responsibility to collect so everyone can buy a house in the first place. |
As a community , we should have pity and not let our brothers be thrown out of their homes. These families will still need to come up with a way to pay the monthly mortgage, or find a cheaper place to live going forward. Nobody is expecting the community to pay the monthly payments for them.
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