Is the UK safe? | Imamother

↑ Ruchi ↓

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 2:52 pm

BestMima wrote:

We live here and are leaving ASAP. Within days of us moving here my husband was attacked on the bus and nobody did anything. A week later we were on the bus in stamford hill and a man came on with swastika tattos etc. again nobody did anything. He gave us dirty looks and followed us around the bus. I've also had students who have been assaulted and one who was targetted by missionaries.
this is london, manchester is much safer I feel. I've only had one incident of aggression ever there. we dont feel safe at all in london.
The UK is a total nightmare. we regret it so much.

I'm sorry to hear this. The vast majority of us have not had any such experiences. It's foreign to us.

↑ BestMima ↓

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 3:25 pm

Ruchi wrote:

I'm sorry to hear this. The vast majority of us have not had any such experiences. It's foreign to us.

We know - to be honest I think it may be that we are very very visibly jewish or just maybe have very bad luck. I lived here before I got married and never really experienced much but I feel like its nonstop for my husband. he is very shy and gentle and it's breaking him

↑ Ruchi ↓

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 3:53 pm

BestMima wrote:

We are also very visibly Jewish, chassidish to be exact.

↑ Busybee5 ↓

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 4:05 pm

Ruchi wrote:

We are also very visibly Jewish, chassidish to be exact.

Does your husband go on public transport a lot, or ever? This makes a big difference I find.
And it's the men/boys who get the brunt of it because they're more visibly Jewish.

My wig looks like hair so I really don't think the non jews can see that I'm Jewish as much as the men.

Fwiw we have 2 cars bh, my dh and I never go on public transport. Very recently we flew, dh wore his capel like normal, and zero trouble whatsoever.

Dh works amongst non jews, he's their boss and he has loads of non Jewish customers, they're all so nice and respectful 🤷‍♀️ I do get nervous at times that people know that he's there, and very Jewish!

BH we feel very safe walking out on Shabbos. They're all used to us here.

↑ BestMima

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 4:09 pm

Busybee5 wrote:

Yep, exactly - neither of us drive, we exclusively use public transport. My husband commutes and has to go through Finsbury park every day in short trousers and black socks, payis etc. I am so nervous for him every day. He's a walking target. I wear tichels, but people leave me alone more than my husband, I think it helps that we live in a frum area and I work in a chassidish frum environment etc so im less exposed

↑ Busybee5 ↓

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 4:11 pm

BestMima wrote:

That sounds so tough for him, and you Sad

amother

Olive

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 4:15 pm

BestMima wrote:

I'm so sorry that you've had such a bad experience.
We use public transport a lot, including DH who wears a kapel, beard, sometimes hat and besides for the odd free Palestine we have never felt in danger.
I had an incident on the tube where someone started mumbling free Palestine and saying f*** Israel... But I didn't feel unsafe just very uncomfortable.

amother

Obsidian

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 4:31 pm

Im so sorry Bestmima thats awful.

Where did you move from?

I live in Manchester and since Oct 7 Im always way more fearful.
Maybe not scared but just conscious all the time, that we are the sheep among the wolves and were not in charge.

For myself, I feel guilty going around carefree, because I wear a wig and know I probably dont look so noticeably jewish. So sometimes I feel 'safe'

I sometimes think what would I do if I was a man.
How would I dress.

For my husband and my boys they havent encountered any real antisemitism but we know it lurks around the corner wherever we go.
Growing up theres always incidents here but bh not too often.
Usually verbal but there has been physical.

I used to feel we live in a medina shel chesed but we are not safe wherever we are.
The non jews hate us and its scary.
Thats how its meant to be.

amother

↑ Broom ↓

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 4:32 pm

BestMima wrote:

Sorry you had that, I had the same in Manchester on a bus nearly 9 yrs ago, I dont think it has anything to do with Israel at war. Just being in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong person, 2 people were holding down the guy until he got to his stop and the bus driver just continued the route as if nothing was happening. It really put a bad taste for DH who is from Israel and had never experienced anything lik ethat and suddenly 2 incidets within 48 hrs, but now we were in London over summer and went down town a few times wearing a white shirt or polo shirt kids wearing kippahs etc on public transport and everyone was so nice to us.
Anywhere out of israel there is antisemitisim, some places now because of the War its dangerous, BH UK isnt one of those places unless you act out of charachter or go downtown on Shabbos.

amother

Tangerine

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 4:45 pm

BestMima wrote:

Are you really planning to leave? Where are you planning to move to?

amother

Currant

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 4:47 pm

My husband grew up in Manchester, I grew up in Stamford Hill (80s and 90s) He says he got tons and tons of antisemitism growing up. I didn't at all but I think its less obvious that women are Jewish. We don't live in the UK anymore but go there often, don't really experience any antisemitism in either place in recent years.

I do get a lot in NY, for some reason the non Jews there are better at sussing out that I am Jewish.

We do have friends from the UK (M.O.) who made aliya recently, they say for this reason.

↑ Ruchi ↓

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 6:25 pm

Busybee5 wrote:

Not daily but we use buses and underground as and when. Even with a natural wig, a yiddishe face can't be hidden.
Growing up, I always knew that Manchester had more anti semitic incidents.

↑ Busybee5 ↓

Sun, Nov 24 2024, 6:51 pm

Ruchi wrote:

Not daily but we use buses and underground as and when. Even with a natural wig, a yiddishe face can't be hidden.
Growing up, I always knew that Manchester had more anti semitic incidents.

I wonder what the stats are because I always thought there were more incidents in Stamford hill Wink

My dh is from Stamford hill.

amother

↑ Broom

Mon, Nov 25 2024, 6:54 am

amother OP wrote:

Thanks, that's good to know. Headlines that we see are so scary that for us in the US we really have no idea how it's like on the ground.

As long as you are behaving normally and stay away from protests on Shabbos it's fine.
Just remind kids not to stare at people especially on the tube or anything like that.