The kids suffer | Imamother

amother

OP ↓

Yesterday at 3:53 am

Reading the post about first trimester teacher who doesn't feel well , and thinking about the post partum teachers, 18-19 year old teachers who are kallahs, etc.
At the end of the day, it is our children who suffer the most from this.
While I understand that people need to work and the schools are looking for teachers who will take a lower salary, our children end up suffering.
If the morah is not in the right headspace for teaching, it will not go well. As we all know,it's not about the subject being taught, but how they handle and relate to the students.
My kids have had so many negative experiences with teachers who were just not qualified at the time. Not to mention that many times they leave for a while and then come back. It's just a recipe for disaster.
I'm not sure what the solution is. It's just extremely frustrating that our most important commodity, our kids, are being sacrificed for this.

amother

Pumpkin ↓

Yesterday at 4:00 am

I teach special Ed. All the assistants are young girls. Most are not focused on their jobs. Many young teachers are busy at night with their friends and their prep for class is compromised. I don’t know what the answer is. But the truth is I don’t think anyone can judge anyone in any job unless they tried it themselves first

amother

Sapphire ↓

Yesterday at 4:06 am

What does this have to do with pregnancy? Our childbearing years are generally while working. Are you suggesting only hiring people past childbearing years? How about only men?

teachkids ↓

Yesterday at 4:09 am

Every life stage has their things. Would you prefer the older teachers who are busy marrying off their kids? Or the ones who are running to drs appointments for themselves or their elderly parents? Or even the teachers making bar mitzvahs? Maybe we should go back to colonial times when teachers were required to stay single.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Yesterday at 4:14 am

Like I said, I don't know what the solution is. The students,especially younger ones, don't have the maturity to see it from the teachers perspective. As a consequence, they feel it is a consequence of their own actions, etc..

imasinger

Yesterday at 4:17 am

And that's where parents should come in, to help provide perspective, ease transitions, advocate with administration as needed, look for help for a kid who isn't doing well, and in general, offer a firm enough foundation in care that a child can weather the inevitable.

And, of course, make sure their children develop a great work ethic, so that if or when they ever become teachers, they aren't overly entitled.

Last edited by imasinger on Wed, Nov 20 2024, 4:20 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Mint ↓

Yesterday at 4:18 am

amother OP wrote:

There is no solution. That's part of life. Just like a mother who is pregnant or postpartum might not be there 100% for her children.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Yesterday at 4:20 am

The teachers are not to be judged..they are just going in to work . Most of the time, the long term ramifications on the kids are lost on them completely. The 19 yr old kallah is not thinking that her 6 year old student may be scarred for life bc of her neglect or whatever it may be..
By the time they've gone through this stage, or the stage of having newborns,etc, they usually leave teaching and the cycle starts all over again..

amother

↑ Sapphire ↓

Yesterday at 4:27 am

Kids suffer with this attitude. Impart to your children resilience. Life doesnt have to be perfect. Teachers dont always feel well are sometimes preoccupied need subs get married move away etc no different than mothers who sometimes dont feel well, are pregnant, juggling taking care of aging parents etc. kids dont get full undivided attention thats not how Hashem created the world. They dont need it in fact it would create children who cant deal with anything.

amother

Canary

Yesterday at 4:28 am

This sounds like possibly an issue with your children’s schools. I know my girls school has phenomenal devoted teachers at all diff ages and stages of life. When they do have babies they have some amazing rotating long term subs. Many teachers are in the 35-45 year range some are younger some are brand new but it’s an incredibly hard job with so much responsibility and I have nothing but high praise for 90% of the teachers I have encountered .

Success10 ↓

Yesterday at 4:32 am

I know of at least 2 amazing teachers in our community who were past childbearing age who had to take leave due to their or their spouse’s illness.

↑ Success10 ↓

Yesterday at 4:34 am

amother OP wrote:

More experienced and qualified teachers cost more. It means your tuition will further increase.

amother

↑ Mint

Yesterday at 4:48 am

amother OP wrote:

We spend on clothing,simchas, cars etc..we can spend on better teachers

I don't understand your point. Better teachers will still be in childbearing years.
Better teachers means paying more tuition. Many places have great teachers and you can move there and pay 20k tuition per child.

amother

Bellflower

Yesterday at 5:03 am

Na. I didn't find that to be a large factor on the teachers ability to teach well, have proper classroom discipline and the children engaged positively.

My children have had plenty of 18 year old first year teachers who were absolutely amazing in every way!
Becuase at the end if the day, it's the heart that counts the most. And the skills can be learned on the job. They graduate 12th grade with a basic idea and then the school provides a LOT of support.

Ironically, it was 2 "experienced" teachers, one in her mid 30s and another 40 yo who were so damaging to my children. One kid developed severe tics that year. It completely went away when the teacher went on maternity leave and came back with a vengeance the day the teacher returned.... as much as I kicked up a storm, those teachers are still teaching.....

amother

↑ Pumpkin

Yesterday at 5:04 am

amother OP wrote:

We spend on clothing,simchas, cars etc..we can spend on better teachers

Teaching is a job that no one understands until you’re actually doing it. You’re on every single last second of your job. There’s no spacing out there’s no going to the bathroom there’s no shutting down for ten seconds to think.

Most other jobs you can space out for five seconds or go to the bathroom when you want

A teacher is human if they are going through a trying time it probably will creep up in their performance and that’s just life

amother

Jasmine

Yesterday at 5:05 am

amother OP wrote:

We spend on clothing,simchas, cars etc..we can spend on better teachers

Exactly the point. People spend so much on clothing simchas and cars that they have no money left for tuition.

amother

Hawthorn

Yesterday at 5:06 am

I think teachers can use more support. I've taught in different schools and some schools the principals put a lot into their teachers, help them with curriculum, give them resources, give advice etc..

amother

↑ OP ↓

Yesterday at 5:13 am

amother Mint wrote:

I would ,but these schools don't usually align with our hashkafos. If it exists, why can't we make our schools like this as well?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Yesterday at 5:17 am

To those who are saying to make your kids tougher in order to handle it, a teacher is akin to a parent in a way. You wouldn't recommend to "toughen up" a kid whose parent was abusive or neglectful. The students look up to the teacher. She is older, wiser, and to be respected.