Experience with __ Therapist in Stamford Hill

amother

Cerulean ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 10:34 am

amother Seafoam wrote:

Are you talking about Dr Davis from Manchester who's in prison?
I'm so upset about that. I really don't believe the stories, I think the people who said stuff about him must have been so sheltered that they have in their heads that he abused them.

I went to him all of my life, he had plenty opportunities to abuse me (and I was pretty naive!!) but he was always so respectful. Like I can check if you want etc.

I don't know him or the story but please, please, believe abuse survivors. Even if you were never violated by him.
Preditors pick specific victims for a variety of reasons. They don't abuse everyone, all the time... Be grateful it didn't happen to you.
The likelihood of the stories being untrue is very very low if he's sitting in prison.

amother

↑ Seafoam ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 10:50 am

amother Cerulean wrote:

That might be true, but how would he prove it? He's not practicing as a Dr anymore anyway. He was so so nice! I can't imagine how hard it must be for him, wife, his only child and grandchildren!

I know that there are a team of people/askanim in the community who are trying to get him out.
My bil told us because he's very involved.

↑ Ruchi ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 10:50 am

amother Cerulean wrote:

Even if didn't happen to 1000 other women, doesn't make it untrue. These abusers choose a few victims and to the rest they will behave impeccably well and polite. They will behave so nice and respectful to the others, that naive women might not want to believe who they really are.
For a case to be accepted by the CPS, there has to be a very high threshold of evidence. If this man was locked up, you can be sure they had testimony from more than one woman.
Thank Hashem that this abuser didn't choose you as his victim, but do feel sorry for those who suffered abuse from him.

amother

↑ Cerulean ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 11:07 am

amother Seafoam wrote:

Ouch this hurts deeply!
It reminds me that if I choose to press charges against the person who abused me? many people's response will look like this.
No I didn't make anything up. Yes, abuser, pedophiles, psychopaths etc don't look like monsters. They are usually charismatic and talented. Many of them are in high places in society. Many are well liked.
It doesn't change the fact that they abused/abuse people.
Why do you feel the need to defend him do badly? Can you understand that others may have had a very different experience with him than you did?

amother

↑ Seafoam ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 11:13 am

amother Cerulean wrote:

I'm sorry , you're right. Were you personally abused by him? I'm so sorry for upsetting you.

amother

↑ Cerulean

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 11:54 am

amother Seafoam wrote:

I'm sorry , you're right. Were you personally abused by him? I'm so sorry for upsetting you.

No. I wasn't abused by him. There's a common thread when it comes to abusers. Hearing you say he's so nice jumped out at me because many people consider the person who abused me an amazing person. I'm bh in a place where seeing such comments doesn't dysregulate me. On the flip side they validate why and how abuse happens. Thank you for listening to the other side of the picture. It's important to have those conversations here and irl.

amother

Gladiolus ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 12:12 pm

amother Seafoam wrote:

I know someone who was abused by him. She is not naive or sheltered. Her life is helll because of it.

amother

↑ Seafoam ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 12:17 pm

amother Gladiolus wrote:

I know someone who was abused by him. She is not naive or sheltered. Her life is helll because of it.

Oh my I'm so sorry, that's terrible! I really can't imagine why he'd ruin peoples lives like this. Must be a nightmare!

amother

↑ Lilac ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 1:19 pm

amother Seafoam wrote:

Dr D tried it on with me.
He picked wrong.
I told him that his actions were uncalled for, and unnecessary for the ailment I had gone for. I also pointed out that he did an exam without offering to call a nurse in.

I went to rabbanim (I was new in manch and didn’t have our own rov yet. And they all sung your disbelieving song.
It’s people like you who are a danger to society.
Shame on you to call me naive or make assumptions about victims.

amother

↑ Gladiolus

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 2:08 pm

amother Lilac wrote:

Dayan Westheim z"l was supportive and exceedingly helpful to victims in this case. Unfortunately he is no longer with us.
I am sorry for your suffering.

amother

↑ Seafoam

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 2:55 pm

amother Lilac wrote:

Sounds like a horrible thing to go through, I'm sorry. I don't know why my brother in law is helping to try to get him out of jail then Sad

it's not just him, I'm sure he's going along with what his Rav is saying to do.

↑ Ruchi ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 3:11 pm

OP, perhaps you can create an email address for ppl to contact you. This can be shared on WhatsApp status or text msgs, so that a wider audience can be reached. I can help with that. I know several people who have status and a large text group.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 3:44 pm

Ruchi wrote:

Thanks for the offer - really kind of you!
What do you suggest should be written?

↑ Ruchi ↓

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 5:07 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thanks for the offer - really kind of you!
What do you suggest should be written?

Perhaps others can chime in and help.

amother

RosePink

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 5:58 pm

I would leave out identifying info and only ask people who had bad experience with a male therapist in SH to reach out. Then I'd give one or two clues (on a one-on-one basis) to see if it's the same person, before discussing anything.

I'd encourage you to run your plan past the LH hotline or a LOR before posting on other groups. These things can get nasty fast.

↑ Ruchi

Thu, Nov 07 2024, 6:16 pm

amother RosePink wrote:

Sounds very wise and helpful advice.

OP, what do you think?