Bedtime | Imamother

amother

OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 12:04 pm

Not sure in which section to put it...but my hub comes home mid bedtime if I sit down with him my bedtime routine goes out of the window...he tries to help but sometimes he just leaves mid bedtime and so he's not a reliable source..

Anyways I worked out a system and can handle bedtime alone...so what do I do with DH while I'm busy ? (Yes hes like a child cause he feels abandoned if I dont sit with him...but coming home at 7 to a family of little kids, its impossible!)

For reference before yom tov my bedtime was 1-2am and I have a baby...till the overtired kids closed their eyes I felt like I'm collapsing !

Yesterday with my new system my house was quiet 9pm and I want that life back !

amother

Tangerine

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 12:06 pm

You look him in the eye and say we had these kids I need to care for, you can join and be helpful or enjoy your vacation ALONE while I do my parental duties.

I’m shocked I’m sorry. He needs help like yesterday.

lucky14

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 12:10 pm

Is he actually disruptive to the bedtime routine or his feelings are just getting hurt that you’re “ignoring” him?

amother

Tealblue

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 12:11 pm

You can't sit down with him at that time, not cos you don't want to, but bec you have other responsibilities. If he is hurt by that it's his problem. You can tell him that while you are happy to see him, right now you need to take care of the kids. You look forward to having time together once they are down.

amother

Broom

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 12:11 pm

Can you try putting them to sleep a bit earlier maybe 630/645 ? If not you need to tell him lovingly that you would love to sit with him but the kids need to be sleeping so you can give him some alone time. If he’s acting like a child treat him like a child. When they are sleeping come out and say thank you for letting me finish putting them to sleep and say how excited you are that he’s home

Calmwater

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 12:13 pm

when do you give supper for your kids?

amother OP wrote:

amother

NeonOrange

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 12:18 pm

I’m sorry I’m not understand this post at all. Your husband demands your attention when he comes home even though it’s in middle of the bedtime routine ? And he feels abandoned if you don’t stop everything and give him that attention?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 11:10 pm

lucky14 wrote:

Is he actually disruptive to the bedtime routine or his feelings are just getting hurt that you’re “ignoring” him?

Not disruptive...just feeling hurt...but I can't really help him, can I? At one point the dishes needs to get cleaned too...

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 11:12 pm

amother Broom wrote:

I start bedtime at 6...but I'm done by 8....its a few kids ages 7 and under...between homework/bedtime routine its not possible to put them to sleep earlier...

We eat supper from 4-6 depending on the kid

amother

↑ OP

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 11:14 pm

amother NeonOrange wrote:

Idk he claims that all his friends come home that time and the wives sit and eat with the hub...I thought maybe im not managing my life right...

Thank you for all advice....today I sat down at 8:15 to eat supper...I didnt look at the long nose staring at me nor did I say anything to feed it....

Thanks for making me feel like a normal human being that is actually managing life