Advice needed -school for my daughter! social or academic?

amother

Wed, Oct 30 2024, 11:13 pm

I'm deciding between two schools for my 1st grade daughter and could use advice/insight/experience! We plan to be in our current city for at least 3 or so more years.

One school is a significantly better run, better staff, more creative, great learning, much more child-centric and happy etc... but has few girls that live in our neighborhood and the ones that do are not my daughter's type.

The other school has kids in the neighborhood -about 4 girls or so- whom my daughter likes and plays with (though none seem to be a best friend for her), but the school itself is shvach and I find them old-fashioned and a bit rigid. But kids there do seem happy and she will have good friends there.
She is a very social child and is super focused on that, though I would also like her to develop better skills at focusing and doing things that are hard for her and to love learning.

Appreciate all thoughts, especially personal experience! thanks!

amother

Whitesmoke

Wed, Oct 30 2024, 11:20 pm

The better run school. That’s what I’d pick. If she’s social she’ll iyh have friends in her school and a well run school will also have a handle on helping the child's social development.

For the girls in the neighborhood who go to the other school, she can be friends with them out of school hours. Some of my dd’s best friends are the neighbors who all went to different schools.

TravelHearter

Thu, Oct 31 2024, 12:12 am

I would say the better run school, but try to put in effort on your end to have her interact to those girls out of school. Offer to drive to play dates, drive kids home from you if it’s far, etc.

amother

Catmint

Sat, Nov 02 2024, 6:24 pm

Trying to understand what you mean by girls being "not her type"? For a child in first grade?
Could you specify in what way those girls are not your daughter's type?

amother

Poinsettia

Sat, Nov 02 2024, 7:07 pm

I actually say the school that she will thrive in and without more detail than your first post, I would actually say the second school. Being happy socially and having who to play with is really important.
My cousin sent her dd to a school that was great academically and ticked every box educationally. But her dd had zero social life. After a couple of years, she switched her dd to the less academic school where she now has a social life, even if she isn't being pushed as much academically.
I also think it's important that the school you choose matches who you are as a family and what your values are. If almost the entire student body don't have internet at home, and never watch movies, and your family do a weekly movie night, you may find your child will struggle at the differences. (movies are used as an example of a difference, and should not be taken to suggest they are bad)

amother

Mayflower

Sat, Nov 02 2024, 10:08 pm

So much could change. First of all you don't think about what's good for just this kid. But any future kids of yours (to an extend) I would go with a school thats not supper pressure or supper weak but also had support for the weak and could handle the bright. People move all the time I wouldn't focus on who lives in your neighborhood. Kids change and adapt to their school. So the school has to have at least some families in the school your families type. Don't worry this child will gravitate to those she's most comfortable with. But will turn into a kid from x school.