5 year old Humping chair

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amother

OP ↓

Sun, Oct 20 2024, 4:24 pm

For about a month now I have been trying to figure out what my child was doing under the table when we go to a specific neighbor's house. I thought she was humping a chair but I wasn't totally sure.
Today we went somewhere that has benches and I saw that she was humping it. She is 5.

Is this normal behavior? What do I do?

amother

NeonYellow ↓

Sun, Oct 20 2024, 4:29 pm

Yes, it is normal behavior, but you should teach her that that is something that she should only do in private.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Sun, Oct 20 2024, 4:33 pm

How do I have that conversation? I'm scared of saying the wrong things

amother

↑ NeonYellow ↓

Sun, Oct 20 2024, 4:36 pm

amother OP wrote:

How do I have that conversation? I'm scared of saying the wrong things

I also had a daughter who did that. I told her that it is ok what she is doing, that I know it feels good, but that it is something that has to be done by herself in her room or in the bathroom. Thats all. Dont add more, dont say less. Just the facts.

amother

↑ OP

Wed, Oct 23 2024, 1:20 pm

amother NeonYellow wrote:

Ok so we spoke about it just like this, but I think she can't figure out what to do in her room or the bathroom without that specific chair.
We went to the house she was doing it by, and she kept asking me if she could do it.
I feel bad for her. I don't really know what to do.

Sewsew_mom

Wed, Oct 23 2024, 1:41 pm

Is it possible she was touched inappropriately?
She's young.
I would try and understand her.

amother

Blushpink

Wed, Oct 23 2024, 2:05 pm

This is a private area of your body and we only do this in private (I.e. your room).
Have you taught her about body privacy? If not this is a good time to start.

Totally normal behavior. DS has rubbed against things since he was a baby.

amother

Clear

Wed, Oct 23 2024, 3:01 pm

Sewsew_mom wrote:

Is it possible she was touched inappropriately?
She's young.
I would try and understand her.

Really, this alone is not reason to suggest such a thing when what she is doing is a normal, and common thing.

amother

Cherry

Wed, Oct 23 2024, 3:03 pm

Sewsew_mom wrote:

Is it possible she was touched inappropriately?
She's young.
I would try and understand her.

There’s no reason to suspect that anything inappropriate went on. Clitoruses feel good when stimulated from when we’re born. Many girls discover this when they’re toddlers, myself included.

Especially with the way it’s presenting, where her daughter can only do it with this random chair, this is seriously not a red flag. But it does make it harder to make her stop doing it. Op, just keep reinforcing that she cannot touch her private parts anywhere but in the bathroom or her bedroom. She’ll probably explore more and figure out how to stimulate without that chair. BH she’s a healthy girl.

amother

↑ NeonYellow

Thu, Oct 24 2024, 2:06 pm

Sewsew_mom wrote:

Is it possible she was touched inappropriately?
She's young.
I would try and understand her.

5 is not young at all to be doing this. I know of two different little girls (I babysat one and the other was a family member) who did this at a younger age.
No reason to think she was touched inappropriately.
Its not a zxual thing for a little kid. It just feels good.

amother

Sand

Sat, Oct 26 2024, 8:52 pm

Yeah I've seen at least two little first graders doing it on the corner of their desks when I used to work in a classroom. I don't think it was anything more than 'they found something that feels good to them'.

amother

Tuberose

Sat, Oct 26 2024, 10:14 pm

I remember doing this as a little kid. It felt like scratching a really amazing itch.
My mother just kept telling me it's private and didnt let me do it out of my room or bathroom. I got the idea eventually.

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