Machzorim - What would you think?

amother

Emerald

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 11:45 am

watergirl wrote:

This OP is just another example for stopping these required gifts. Women don't need to feel anxiety about not having the expected item at the right time and place.

I got myself machsorim with my name last year after 16 years of marriage. There is no deadline by the wedding

amother

Oatmeal

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 12:00 pm

My Israeli in-laws bought me the classic kallah miller machzor set, with a matching siddur and tehillim. I wish they wouldn't have felt they need to buy coz every one gives.
For Rosh Hashonah and YK I use my artscroll interlinear I got from my bas Mitzvah, it's the brown not leather one.
I don't look around what everyone else is using.

amother

Hyssop

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 12:10 pm

amother OP wrote:

I've never seen (or at least, never noticed) a married woman in shul without her classic kallah machzor.

What would you think if you saw a woman who did not have that and was using a regular or child's machzor Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur?

I'm most interested in responses from Chassidish women, but I'm curious to see cultural differences as well.

I would think... nothing.
I would not notice what machzor she was using. If I did notice, I would not give it another thought.

amother

↑ Springgreen ↓

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 12:43 pm

I don't think OP actually looks around during davening, I think it's when people are walking in, leave their machzor on the table, when you schmooze after davening....or the "general knowledge" that people get kallah machzors....

amother

↑ OP ↓

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 12:48 pm

amother Springgreen wrote:

This. Especially as a "newlywed" and new to the shul.

amother

Arcticblue

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 12:54 pm

B'Syata D'Shmya wrote:

Whats a childs machzor? (pictures and scratch and sniff shofar pictures?)

Scratch and sniff
Mind you that's a good idea for a Yom Kippur machzor!

↑ Ruchel ↓

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 1:26 pm

amother Mimosa wrote:

JPF- I never got. I did get a siddur with my name spelled wrong, so don’t use that either

My kids got that at school different times 'you'd think people could check. What we could modify we did. But dd1 graduation one? I demanded a change

↑ Ruchel ↓

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 1:28 pm

watergirl wrote:

This OP is just another example for stopping these required gifts. Women don't need to feel anxiety about not having the expected item at the right time and place.

A DANK

Bnei Berak 10 ↓

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 1:32 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

can someone please explain what a CLASSIC kallah machzor is?

AFAIK in my circles there are always ads for leatherette bound or genuine leather sets hardcover for RH YK Pesach and Shavuot. It comes as a set sitting in a box. Usually white ivory or pink and kallahs name embossed in gold print.
I don't have such a set and don't even want it, my Artscroll set is perfect Smile

↑ Bnei Berak 10

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 1:42 pm

amother OP wrote:

Please don't be.

People don't judge others based on their machzor or sidur.

I was only wondering how unusual or noticeable I would be in shul.

I would just think you use the most comfortable machzor *for you and your needs*. Please please use what you like. One could even say "this machzor is a good fit for me and it makes me enjoy the tfilla even more". Nobody would be able to argue about that.

Beautiful

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 1:50 pm

Hey OP. I have the small size artscroll set, I got as a gift as a girl. It was my afikoman, birthday, Chanukah etc present for the year, I begged for it. Still remember it was $125.

The only reason I got a new RH and YK machzor is bc I married into a different nusach. It never occurred to me to expect a set when getting married. For Sukkos and Pesach, I use a siddur.

I wouldn't notice anything if someone had or didn't have a kallah machzor set.

OOT yeshivish

ShishKabob

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 1:52 pm

watergirl wrote:

Ahh ok now the context makes sense.

I'm remarried now BH for 18 years. It was 10 years before I had an engagement ring, so I really get it. We just did not have the money and that was WAY before it was a thing to get moissanite etc. for $200 but even then, we had tuition to pay so who had $200 for a ring?

You don't need to borrow a child's machzor. Let's get creative.

Where I live, there are rummage and rehoming groups and people post machzorim for sale all the time. Can you watch out on the local groups and see who is giving away machzorim?

I bet there are at least three women on this site who have machzorim sitting around they would love to hand down to you!

This is where imamother excels.

Great idea!
OP, there are used seforim stores that sell machzorim for very cheap. Try them!
For those that are not chassidish, you probably won't be able to relate since almost everyone gets a 'kallah machzor'. I personally like the ones that I can understand the translation.

Last edited by ShishKabob on Tue, Sep 24 2024, 3:20 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Apple

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 2:05 pm

Nort chadidish never got one when I got married he was the same one. I always had. I didn’t even know I was supposed to get one for my daughter-in-law. The last year I got it sent for my daughter who is married and my daughter-in-law. So clearly in the circles, I run in and nobody gets them. Unless it’s a gift just because not because they’re getting married.

amother

Burlywood ↓

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 2:32 pm

I do not have, nor have I ever had, a "classic kallah's" anything. My crowd doesn't operate that way. Furthermore, I don't waste headspace speculating on why someone uses any particular item, least of all a religious item. Where I come from, you use any machzor you darn well please and no one thinks even once about it. I have used everything from the old Adler machzor with Yiddish teitch to my dad's machzor from the Haganah to the JBI large type to the Artscroll to the Birnbaum to the one I bought in some obscure out of the way shop in Yerushalayim. Each has its pluses and minuses, and I have yet to find one that hits the spot all around. Artscroll is nice enough, but who told them that black ink on a grey shaded background is a good idea? It works if you're twenty and your shul is well lit. Eyes over forty need strong contrast, so I now avoid Artscroll if at all possible. That kallah's classic machzor is gonna be history once that kallah hits retirement age and has incipient cataracts.

amother

↑ Burlywood

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 2:57 pm

FTR, I not only still daven out of a Siddur Shiloh, which was the classic school Siddur for sixty or seventy years before Artscroll was born, but I went out and bought several new copies a few years ago just in case they ever discontinue it. For over 60 years it has been my favorite; I lost count of how many I've had. When the binding gives out, I replace it with a new one. It's the most user-friendly Siddur I've ever seen. Sorry, Artscroll, your stage notes are lovely but you're hard on the eyes. And I will neither apologize for nor be ashamed of using a "children's" Siddur. If they published machzor I'm I'd be using them, too.

zaq ↓

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 3:07 pm

amother Birch wrote:

And this is a 'kids' one:

https://www.shopeichlers.com/p.....cover

What's childlike about it, other than being a more moderately -priced edition? Does it or does it not contain all the requisite prayers?

↑ Elfrida

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 3:35 pm

amother Burlywood wrote:

Memories! I had one of them for years, but I'd completely forgotten about it. I wonder if it's still somewhere in my parents house.

amother

Magenta

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 3:52 pm

As someone who got a full set of the basic artscroll machzorim for my bas mitzva, I said I didn't see the point of spending money on a new set. My grandmother bought them for me, pretty much the last gift she ever bought me and they hold a lot of sentimental value for me. Also I felt I've davened from these machzorim for years and they hold all those tefillos, I didn't want to change them.
I have considered one day getting them rebound with one of the beautiful leather covers, but for now the plain blue works for me.
Op, it sounds like it's bothering you that you don't have your own machzor. But most people wouldn't notice what you're davening with, as they're busy with their own davening.

amother

↑ Springgreen

Tue, Sep 24 2024, 4:08 pm

OP I'm genuinely asking, after hearing all the responses, do you feel a little more confident using whatever machzor you do have?
I know it doesn't take away the feeling of "wanting a nice set" and hopefully a few years down the line you'll get one. But in the meantime, after see everyone's response, do you feel better?