Every single thing is fight

amother

OP ↓

Tue, Sep 17 2024, 9:52 am

Every single tiny little thing is a fight with my 2 year old. And I am someone who really has a lot of patience. I am a very hands-on, loving mother, the type that gets down on the floor to play with toys, the type that makes up bedtime stories and songs and makes up games for cleaning up and bathroom and all that. But my 2 year old is so unbelievably stubborn. He won’t let me change his diaper, he won’t let me get him dressed, he won’t eat breakfast, he won’t let me clean his face, he throws food all over the place, he tried to hurt the baby. He won’t get in the car, he won’t get out of the car. He won’t even do things he likes like go outside to go to the park! But what really gets me is that every single part of everything is a fight-he won’t let me take off his pants, his dirty diaper, he won’t let me wipe him, put back on a clean diaper, put his pants back on. Literally every single part of everything. Right now we’re half hour late to playgroup with no end in sight…he is not getting dressed and if I force it on him he takes it off. I’m literally going to cry.

amother

Diamond

Tue, Sep 17 2024, 9:56 am

amother OP wrote:

I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. I don’t know what the issue is but it’s worth it to get your child evaluated and see if he can qualify for any services through early intervention. OT or play therapy might help. This behavior is extreme, even for the terrible twos

justforfun87

Tue, Sep 17 2024, 10:20 am

I wrote two threads about this years ago with my 2 kids. Turns out it really was the terrible 2's cause BH 6-8 years later things really improved. I didn't even remember writing the first post until I posted the second time and it showed up in related topics. Is this your first kid?

mha3484

Tue, Sep 17 2024, 10:31 am

Some kids are just inherently very strong willed. I seem to have quite a few. My rebbetzin would tell me the kids who give you the biggest challenge will give you the biggest nachas and I would remind myself of that and its really turned out to be true.

With my oldest, his early years were HARD but in 8th grade he has such strong hashkfaos and sees the world in such a good way. When he was in nursery (year before pre1a) I went to a lecture from Ross Greene who wrote the book the explosive child. It really works for this type of kid. At this age you cant really have the type of conversation the method uses but the premise changes how you see their behavior which changes the whole dynamic. You can read more at www.livesinthebalance.org in the parent section if you dont want to buy the book.

amother

Nasturtium

Tue, Sep 17 2024, 11:22 am

I had this with my now ds6. It’s really hard. You have my sympathies. Bh it’s much easier now but I still need lots of patience getting ready in the morning and at night. He definitely needed OT so would be worthwhile looking into that.