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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Preschoolers
amother
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 Thu, Jul 18 2024, 9:14 pm
My 5 year old went on a playdate (much awaited) on a tuesday. She usually has girls come to our house, this was her first time going to someone else (except for neighbors).
A full week later, we were just talking, and she mentioned to me that when she was at the girl's house, the girl said she's allowed to cross the street by herself, and so they crossed the street to the girl's cousin.
I asked my daughter why she didn't say that she's not allowed to cross the street herself and she said she couldn't.
So there's obviously two problems.
One - the street crossing - majorly dangerous for two 5 year olds to cross the street themselves. But B"H that was ok.
The bigger issue at this point, is that she needs to be able to say no. Throughout all the years ahead iy"H.
Can anyone recommend a book or a story about exercising the "no" muscle when it comes to peer pressure?
Any thoughts welcome. No bashing please.
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dena613
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Thu, Jul 18 2024, 9:29 pm
I think it's an important thing to talk about as a mother.
It's also important in terms of unwanted or inappropriate touch.
Keep talking about how if you know something is wrong, then even if someone tells you to do something you don't listen, etc.
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dena613
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Thu, Jul 18 2024, 9:29 pm
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And obviously I wouldn't send again unless you make it clear to the mom that your dd needs someone over age X to cross her.
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B'Syata D'Shmya
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Thu, Jul 18 2024, 9:55 pm
So its well known that your child is your child till age 5 and then peer pressure kicks in. I would be pleasant and positive rather than negative and judgemental in your responses to situation s of this nature. You can tell her that you love her and your job is to help her protect herself, Hashem wants us to take special care of ourselves. We know that its dangerous for children under age 8 to cross themselves and thats why she always always needs to have an adult to help her cross safely. Reassure her that she will grow and do it herself, but for now its dangerous.
Regarding the friend, it could be the girl misunderstood. I would mention something to the mother in a light way, avoid being judgemental.
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amother
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Thu, Jul 18 2024, 10:10 pm
Thanks everyone!
I will think about these!
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