S/O mock weddings | Imamother

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children

S/O mock weddings

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View latest: 24h 48h 72h

What do you think of mock weddings?

I love them! Think they're a great idea.

21%

[ 38 ]

I don't really care, but I think they're harmless.

50%

[ 90 ]

I'm a little weirded out by the idea, but I guess I've gotten used to it.

16%

[ 29 ]

So strange. I really don't get it.

11%

[ 20 ]

Total Votes : 177

amother

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:31 pm

The post about little girls and makeup made me think...Does anyone else think that mock weddings are strange? I never really "got" why camps/schools/playgroups have them, and it seems so odd to me. My daughter in a 2 year old playgroup was chosen to be the kallah in their mock wedding, and a little boy was the chosson. The morah sent home a video, and it was so, so strange watching her walk down the aisle and then walk seven times around the little boy, and then the boy giving her a ring...It made me cringe. My husband felt even weirder about this than I did -- he'd never even heard of the concept before.

And the older girls, elementary school aged, have a girl getting married to another girl dressed as a boy. I just don't get it. I remember having one mock wedding, way back when I was a kid, and I didn't really get it then either. But now it seems to be the norm.

Am I the only one who thinks it's strange?

amother

Lavender

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:39 pm

First time I heard of mock wedding

I don’t live in Lakewood needless to say

amother

Lotus

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:39 pm

The actual copying of the chupah down to the ring is strange, never heard of doing that. Stam the dress up, dancing and shmorg I think is harmless fun.

Going anon for this, as many who know me would recognize me... My DH and I were in the same bungalow colony as 3 year olds. There was a mock wedding, and yup I was the Kallah and my DH the Chosson... We have a picture of the 2 of us holding hands!

amother

Dimgray

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:49 pm

amother OP wrote:

It's actually realy problematic to do a mock wedding and give a ring with witnesses. Hopefully because of age there are ways around this, but there are actually times when these "mock weddings" have required a get.

amother

NeonOrange

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:50 pm

I think it’s a cute way for kids to learn about weddings, and a fun activity for older children.

Little kids doing the whole circling thing is odd though.

amother

Crocus ↓

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:52 pm

This scenario is strange.

When we did fake weddings for my preschool boys students. One was the kallah the other was the chossen put on the chuppah niggun made a fake chuppa and after 30 seconds played oiyd yishama for a few seconds.

amother

Denim ↓

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:52 pm

Mock wedding with boys and girls can be Halachically problematic and really weird
But in just boys or just girls setting it's different. I think the point of this was originally to teach kids (maybe from non religious background) about a Jewish wedding

amother

Purple ↓

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:53 pm

amother Lavender wrote:

First time I heard of mock wedding

I don’t live in Lakewood needless to say

lol mock weddings are done all over the world in every society. What in the world is the connection to Lakewood.

amother

↑ Denim

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:54 pm

amother Lavender wrote:

First time I heard of mock wedding

I don’t live in Lakewood needless to say

Why bring Lakewood into this? No connection

I don't live in Lakewood, never have, and don't associate with that type of community and I've seen many many mock weddings

I wonder why you felt the need to mention Lakewood for absolutely no reason

gootlfriends

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:57 pm

I see no harm in it and it can be fun. But it is a little weird how some camps do it.

amother

↑ Purple

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 5:59 pm

Kids really do enjoy it. Weddings are fun and many kids don’t get to go to many. I’d hope they don’t mimic the chuppah too much and focus on the party part to avoid halachic issues. Our preschool has one when they teach about weddings in the parsha.

amother

Lily

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 11:18 pm

I remember a teacher in sem telling us about a mock wedding in which the "chosson" said the actual words "harei at mekudeshes li" and gave the "kallah" something and it ended up being a real halachic issue.

Just be careful and make sure the wedding isn't too "real"!

Otherwise, it's just plain fun. Mock wedding was one of the best activities in day camp/camp growing up.

amother

Holly

Sun, Jul 14 2024, 11:29 pm

Apparently years ago there was a carnival that had a mock wedding booth. There were two lines, boys and girls. And when they got to the front, the boy said harei at and gave the girl a wedding ring. Was a huge halachic issue after and they had to track everyone down and give gittin to each other.

No idea if this actually happened, but this is the story I heard years ago regarding all those rumors about halachic issues.

amother

Burlywood

Mon, Jul 15 2024, 12:06 am

I think it is so weird. I mean I kind of get it for when learning the parsha in preschool they have a very simple mock dress up play wedding is one thing- where there is a chupah out of a sheet they stand under for 30 seconds, maybe they wear a white dress/suit, some of the songs and some dancing and snack time.

But for anyone older than 3 or 4? Uh, no.
It is a kadosh time. Not a game or a fun activity in camp for teens.

amother

Junglegreen

Mon, Jul 15 2024, 1:41 am

I'm in my 40's and have never been to Lakewood and this was always a part of my childhood. Doesn't bother me at all.

In my experience it has very little to do with the couple (Walk down the aisle, Mazel Tov!, that's it.) and more to do about the guests. Growing up, each class or bunk had to dress up as a certain kind of guest ("The Weird Uncles", "The Shadchans", "The Tzedakah Collectors") and the wedding was much more about the fun of dressing up and dancing (and great food!), than the chuppah or the 'couple'.

amother

Cantaloupe

Mon, Jul 15 2024, 5:03 am

amother Lavender wrote:

First time I heard of mock wedding

I don’t live in Lakewood needless to say

Why the dis to lakewood?

amother

↑ Crocus

Mon, Jul 15 2024, 5:37 am

amother Lily wrote:

I’ve heard the same /similar story of a bucher who threw a shoe at a girl and said harei at… and she caught it was a big problem.

Simple1

Mon, Jul 15 2024, 6:06 am

I grew up in NY in the 80s and mock weddings were definitely a thing especially in camps and bungalow colonies.. I remember chashuv rabannim warning about the dangers of this activity especially one incident where there was an actual boy and girl. I could see thinking it’s strange OTOH counselors have to keep coming up with new ideas and this is a fun activity for the kids.

tigerwife

Mon, Jul 15 2024, 7:48 am

Weddings are fun, this is a cute activity to bring that joy to kids who don’t often go to weddings.

Ruchel

Mon, Jul 15 2024, 7:54 am

Can't imagine

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