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Forum
-> Vacation and Traveling
amother
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 11:09 am
DH and I vacation is (somewhat) ruined by my unpredictable perimenopause period coming sooo early. We hardly get to go away just the two of us , last summer we got a couple of days and now finally this summer we get a week BH. But I am so bummmed about my extremely early surprise period , exactly at the wrong time. Same thing happens last summer , but that was less of a deal it was just a couple of days and not expensive. I feel like canceling this vacay but it’s all non refundable. We were rly looking forward to this vacay after a loooong year . I know there’s nothing to do , but Thnx for listening to my vent. Can’t vent to anyone in real life , appreciate having this safe space.
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amother
Caramel
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 11:10 am
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amother
Vermilion
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 11:10 am
I’d still go. You can bond in other ways and it’s nice to be away just the two of you.
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amother
Hyssop
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 11:10 am
Such a disappointment and so private lol
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amother
Vanilla
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 11:10 am
Happened to me too, so so sad!
Hugs!
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amother
DarkGreen
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 11:22 am
Perimenopause sucks. If men had to go through this they would all get some kind of operation right away - no way they could handle it.
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amother
Lightblue
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 12:31 pm
I know it’s too late now and I’m so sorry this happened. I’m in a similar stage of life and I take agyston if we have a vacation planned so that I don’t have to worry about it coming early. This changed my vacation life. Like I said, I know it’s too late and I’m not trying to put salt in your wound just so that you can plan ahead for next time. I take it five days before I expect it and honestly honestly if I have a trip I might even start it earlier so I don’t have to worry about a problem.
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amother
Mulberry
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 12:58 pm
I don't think I've ever been on vacation with my DH where I haven't been niddah for at least most of the time. As disappointing as it is, it just something I've learned to take in my stride and I manage to enjoy myself anyways. I suggest you do the same.
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amother
Oxfordblue
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 1:27 pm
amother Mulberry wrote: | I don't think I've ever been on vacation with my DH where I haven't been niddah for at least most of the time. As disappointing as it is, it just something I've learned to take in my stride and I manage to enjoy myself anyways. I suggest you do the same. |
same. maybe our honeymoon but that’s it. vacation is about so much more to and cancelling wouldn’t be on my radar at all
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AlwaysHoping
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 1:29 pm
I haven't been able to get away with dh in over 6 years... so count your blessings, even if you are niddah
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amother
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 3:34 pm
Thank you to the imamothers who took the time to respond kindly. ❤️
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amother
Dandelion
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 4:12 pm
amother OP wrote: | Yes. I made sure to get some and I planned to start taking it today, more than five days before expected period . But then it came today. |
In the same boat. Got me period on day 21. Flying off to israel this week.
I was always regular until 4 months ago. Now cant plan anything. 2 cycles ago was 45 days. Figured menopause is around the corner.
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amother
DarkViolet
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 4:48 pm
I sympathize but I also don't understand. Is your relationship based only on s*x? Isn't the chance to spend relaxed time together and have uninterrupted grown-up conversations without the kids listening in or making nuisances of themselves worth anything to you? Is it really just about uninhibited s*x and therefore "ruined" if that's not an option?
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amother
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 4:59 pm
amother DarkViolet wrote: | I sympathize but I also don't understand. Is your relationship based only on s*x? Isn't the chance to spend relaxed time together and have uninterrupted grown-up conversations without the kids listening in or making nuisances of themselves worth anything to you? Is it really just about uninhibited s*x and therefore "ruined" if that's not an option? |
No. It’s not just about that. It is part of it.we have had a very long year and that was going to be part of our reconnecting , which we could use , in a beautiful location. And even just casual kissing. Just holding hands. And passing things to each other , and not having to be hyper vigilant about shoulders rubbing in small airplane seats. Being Niddah - especially unexpectedly the day leaving on a long planned and long saved up for trip - does have a big effect.
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amother
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 5:01 pm
amother Dandelion wrote: | In the same boat. Got me period on day 21. Flying off to israel this week.
I was always regular until 4 months ago. Now cant plan anything. 2 cycles ago was 45 days. Figured menopause is around the corner. |
Dandelion you have my sympathy. Similar numbers for me too. And part of why we chose this trip was due to the timing. Ha. Man plans GD laughs. PSA perimenopause may last for several years , sorry.
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amother
Begonia
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Tue, Jul 02 2024, 5:24 pm
amother DarkViolet wrote: | I sympathize but I also don't understand. Is your relationship based only on s*x? Isn't the chance to spend relaxed time together and have uninterrupted grown-up conversations without the kids listening in or making nuisances of themselves worth anything to you? Is it really just about uninhibited s*x and therefore "ruined" if that's not an option? |
It’s not just the lack of s*x, which yes for both of us is a huge aspect of going away alone both on the vacation itself and it carries through in a positive way when we come back, it’s needing to maintain boundaries that just doesn’t lead to the same connection.
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