Father bathing girls

Trademark ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 7:22 am

amother Fern wrote:

Seems like op is trying to get us to bash her bil and sister. The original op didn’t work so she added on stuff. Sorry op, I don’t believe you, you don’t come along as genuine.

Agree, something seems off.

singleagain ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 7:26 am

amother Amaryllis wrote:

Totally depends on the circumstance. Yhe only hard and fast rule I'd say is never past age 12. Even if Dad is single and daughter broke her leg, he should hire a woman to bathe her.

As a 38 year old who had back surgery almost a year ago and needed help in the shower, you bet my dad helped to reach my back when my mom wasn't available. And don't freak. I sat on a stool in the middle of the tub, leaning forward covering my front while he opened the glass door behind me and washed and rinsed just my back for me since I couldn't twist. And I only needed help for the first week or two,... But I had absolutely no qualms asking my dad to help me bc you know he's my dad.

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 7:29 am

LovesHashem wrote:

I don't know, kinda sounds creepy to me. Granted my oldest isn't 8, and my husband is a super involved father, does bath time most of the time because I have lingering back pain from having my babies.

He loves giving them baths, taking them to the beach to the pool etc but if I heard a father say he specifically loved giving his 8 yr old dd a bath.... I don't know, it sounds creepy to me. 8 is huge, I think my father helped me at that age with my curly hair and shower but he didn't sit there and do the whole thing for me and he didn't say he looked forward to it as bonding time....

Just the vibes here are making me uncomfortable. If there's a legitimate need at that age I don't see an issue but this doesn't sound like that.

See, thars not how I hear it. I hear that a father loves to hqve father daughter time. And bath time is the ideal time. THATS ALL.
Im really not sure why people read into threads when there is nothing there to read into.

↑ WhatFor

Mon, May 20 2024, 7:40 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

Are you serious? You are taking the op waaaay too deeply. Your answer makes ZERO sense. Zero.

That comes across as quite disrespectful, frankly. And yes, I am serious. I'm sure we can communicate respectfully, even when we disagree with someone.

If there's something you don't understand about my post, feel free to ask for clarification. It's a bit bold to state my post makes "zero sense". Do you find my syntax confusing? Are there particular words you don't understand? Is there a logical flaw in there? If you're more specific maybe I can help you out.

↑ LovesHashem

Mon, May 20 2024, 8:05 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

It's not about loving it, it's also the age. There's a difference between saying loving giving a 2 yr old a bath and an 8 yr old.

My husband loves giving my 2 yr old a bath, why is an 8 year old having a bath with everything done like a 2 year old has?

amother

Teal

Mon, May 20 2024, 8:06 am

My husband doesn't bathe my kids but my father did the baths thursday night when I was little. My sister was 7. He put all of us in the tub at the same time. I doubt he loved it but he certainly made it fun.

amother

Diamond ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 8:16 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

How is that a bad thing? Its lovely that the father wants daddy daughter time.
Not everything has to be creepy.

Except if said daughter posts on Imamother in a decade that her father molested her c'v right under her mother's nose....

If my DD 9 ever needs help in the bath or shower my DH tells me to attend to her.

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 8:35 am

WhatFor wrote:

I just meant you were making assumptions and great leaps into ideas that were not in the op at all.

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 8:37 am

LovesHashem wrote:

Who knows why the 8 year old is aldo having a bath? Thats not whast people are up in arms about here.
I think the father just likes bsth time. Thats it. Nothing to read into. Seriously.

↑ Trademark ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 8:44 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

I just meant you were making assumptions and great leaps into ideas that were not in the op at all.

Seems like you didn't read all of op's posts. She was talking about her nieces walking around the house naked.

amother

Fuchsia

Mon, May 20 2024, 8:44 am

I don’t remember how old I was but I definitely have fond memories of playing tic tac toe on my stomach with bubbles with my father and now 35 years later I can tell you he’s the most innocent person!!!

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 8:51 am

Trademark wrote:

Seems like you didn't read all of op's posts. She was talking about her nieces walking around the house naked.

I read every post. The reply that I was rwplying to added in other assumptions.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 9:00 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

He loves having daddy daughter time while bathing the girls, to the point of not teaching 8 year old how to bathe herself & only him bathing her, never mom. I think it's just weird.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 9:01 am

amother Fern wrote:

Seems like op is trying to get us to bash her bil and sister. The original op didn’t work so she added on stuff. Sorry op, I don’t believe you, you don’t come along as genuine.

It's fine, you don't have to believe anything. It doesn't make it not happening...

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 9:07 am

amother OP wrote:

He loves having daddy daughter time while bathing the girls, to the point of not teaching 8 year old how to bathe herself & only him bathing her, never mom. I think it's just weird.

Some things the husband always does, some the wife. There is NOTHING strange about that. And you shouldnt think there is.
Also, about teaching a kid to clean themselves, im sorry but by 8, just by hwving the parent do it every time, they know. Im sure the 8 year old knows how to wash her body. Tts just a bondinvmg experience.

amother

Opal ↓

Mon, May 20 2024, 11:55 am

Am I the only one who feels as OP does, that it feels off?

Doesn't mean it IS, but it *feels* wrong.

I have all girls. I do showers, and at about 6yo I start teaching them to do it themselves.
Btw, at 4/5yo I start teaching them to wash themselves.

Here's how I see it. I start teaching them at a young age body safety. No one is allowed to touch their bathing suit area. So once they are able I teach them to do it themselves. I don't even touch them. (Except when needed) Not bc I'm a creap, not that I voice that it's for body safety. I just say it's a tznius thing and they are big so they can do it themselves now. It's not a big deal on either end, and they love being independent.

But I think if they know that no one is allowed to touch them. And mommy and daddy don't even touch them, then it sets them up better to understand/protect from bad touch. It also teaches modesty, so they won't go around naked, that they want to cover up...

My husband bathed them as newborns, especially my oldest bc I was so nervous to. But as we've gone on I do it. For sure once they are 1 I am doing it. Not for tznius,but bc schedule doesn't allow for it.

If that weren't the case, I wouldn't let after age 2 tho, personally.