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8 year old cries from scary thoughts
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amother
OP  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:32 pm
My 8 year old twists and turns many nights and calls me that she hears noises in her room. So I got her a sound machine. But recently it got worse and she keeps calling me to her room that she's having scary thoughts. She was just sobbing that she's trying to make the thoughts go away but they keeps coming back. Any tips?
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amother
SandyBrown  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:34 pm
did you ask her what type of thoughts?
my 10 yr old had this when he was 8 but BH it got better. I'll ask dh what we did, I don't recall.
I also took him for craniosacral therapy.
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amother
Brunette  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:38 pm
Does she watch movies?
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amother
Scarlet  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:42 pm
Check for strep
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:46 pm
Checked strep twice in last 2 weeks. Negative.
No movies, the most she watched in her life was some cocomelon or blippi Smile
She says she thinks of robbers most and house fires. I tried talking her out of it, and trying to teach her to distract herself with happy thoughts.
It seems to be getting worse. She's in bed over an hour already and was just sobbing so that's when I posted cuz I don't know what else to do.
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amother
  Scarlet  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:48 pm
amother OP wrote:
Checked strep twice in last 2 weeks. Negative.
No movies, the most she watched in her life was some cocomelon or blippi Smile
She says she thinks of robbers most and house fires. I tried talking her out of it, and trying to teach her to distract herself with happy thoughts.
It seems to be getting worse. She's in bed over an hour already and was just sobbing so that's when I posted cuz I don't know what else to do.
What made you check for strep?

Could it be pinworms?
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amother
  Brunette


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:49 pm
Sounds like anxiety you might need to involve a psychologist
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:05 pm
amother Scarlet wrote:
What made you check for strep?

Could it be pinworms?


She complained about her throat but ended up coming down with massive cold so I guess was just that.
How would I know if it's pinworms if she's not touching or complaining about that area? And does this cause such anxiety?
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amother
  SandyBrown  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:07 pm
you can put a reziel hamalach under her pillow. tell her it's for protection. she can say shema carefully.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:08 pm
amother Brunette wrote:
Sounds like anxiety you might need to involve a psychologist


This is what I'm thinking too. She always was a worrier but if it's turning into something that's dictating her life it prob needs more help than I can provide
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:08 pm
amother SandyBrown wrote:
you can put a reziel hamalach under her pillow. tell her it's for protection. she can say shema carefully.

I will try this right now. Thank you
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amother
Cinnamon  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:09 pm
I would start with giving her a segula. Either saying shema or something similar. I'm not a big fan of sigulas but they work for anxiety very well.

If that doesn't work, Maybe try professional. I'm a big believer that it's more effective for you to go yourself than your daughter too.
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amother
  SandyBrown


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:11 pm
my kids do well with storytime distractions on ipod. shouldnt be anything too exciting or scary obviously.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:14 pm
Thanks. I would Def try to be the one talking to a professional at this age. She wouldn't even have to know about it hopefully.
I can try a cd. Never liked giving kids a crutch to fall asleep but maybe this is the time for it
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amother
  Scarlet


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:35 pm
amother OP wrote:
She complained about her throat but ended up coming down with massive cold so I guess was just that.
How would I know if it's pinworms if she's not touching or complaining about that area? And does this cause such anxiety?
You wrote she's anxious in general. And now she's sick, and her anxiety is ramping up. Sounds like inflammation can be causing her anxiety. I would be curious to see what happens with motrin.
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amother
Springgreen


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:40 pm
Play therapy with a licensed therapist can be really helpful for children who have anxiety and fears especially when you can’t pinpoint exactly what causes it.
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amother
Celeste


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:55 pm
This was me, and it’s still me 20 years later

My anxiety actually started off with the night fears around that age, before it snowballed into all other aspects of my life and got crippling. 13 years into therapy and im at least a functioning human capable of being married and a parent and driving and going into stores to shop. But it took A LOT of work to get here unfortunately

The insomnia still come to me but in phases, I can go months sleeping fine and then weeks straight of being up all night because of my anxiety (same fears- break ins, fires). It is a horrible thing to live with, fear is like death

Different things helped me in different stages for the sleep issues. I find the most helpful to be falling asleep watching tv, something safe and soothing. That’s what I’ve done the most throughout my life. Personally my experience with shema and similar ideas- it triggered major OCD and fears itself. I started doing it around 10yo, I became obsessed thinking that I needed to say shema correctly to be safe, and I’d say it 30+ times every night throughout. I also had to say chas veshalom to every single scary thought I had. It ended up just making things worse and making me focus on my fears a lot more than making me feel safe

Definitely recommend sending her to therapy. I wish I’d done that as a kid, I might have avoided a lot of damage in my life. I’m not saying it’s the same situation, and I know the cause of my issues, but it’s definitely something to take seriously
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 7:58 pm
amother Springgreen wrote:
Play therapy with a licensed therapist can be really helpful for children who have anxiety and fears especially when you can’t pinpoint exactly what causes it.


Is an 8 year old too big for play therapy? She's a mature, smart kid. Always thought play therapy was for preschoolers
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amother
  Cinnamon  


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 8:07 pm
Just one example, because you could use some education on anxiety.

If you try to make intrusive thoughts go away, they get stronger and come back stronger. Your daughter is doing exactly the counterproductive thing.

This book can be a good start for you.
Breaking Free of Child Anxiety and OCD: A Scientifically Proven Program for Parents https://a.co/d/dQ2CedL
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amother
  OP


 

Post Tue, Apr 02 2024, 8:15 pm
amother Cinnamon wrote:
Just one example, because you could use some education on anxiety.

If you try to make intrusive thoughts go away, they get stronger and come back stronger. Your daughter is doing exactly the counterproductive thing.

This book can be a good start for you.
Breaking Free of Child Anxiety and OCD: A Scientifically Proven Program for Parents https://a.co/d/dQ2CedL


Thank you. I am an anxious person myself but distraction and self talk just seem to work bh. I guess everyone is wired differently.
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